Hmmm
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Thread Starter
Join Date: May 2004
Location: England
Posts: 3,410
Hmmm
Well, seems like I’ve hit a few raw nerves here. It’s good for me to remember that just because an alcoholic stops drinking, doesn’t mean that the “It’s all about me” attitude just disappears overnight.
I wrote most of this to put on the “General” thread, but it was closed before I had a chance to post. However, I feel that I want to clarify a few things and then maybe we can go back to normal (Ha!). For the record, I don’t post on the Alcoholism board very often, but I do read it every day. I feel that if we stick to our own “camps” then we lose the opportunity for education and growth.
I posted the thread for two reasons.
Firstly, because the image of even a General being able to tell alcoholics anything made me chuckle. I am glad that there are people on these boards who I can share that with.
But I admit to a subtext - I got weary of reading stories by (mainly) women who are doing everything in their power to keep their families together, working 2 or more jobs, running around after the kids, whilst their partner spends the house-keeping on booze and sits on the couch all day. Do you know how hard it is to see an escape from that life when you haven’t got a minute in the day for yourself?
Tracey, I’m sorry (for you) that you find the Friends and Family Forum “dreadful”. This is often the only lifeline these people have. They often can’t get to meetings because they can’t trust their partner to be sober enough to watch the kids. Those of us who are a bit further down the road do our best to help them see that their situation isn’t hopeless, but there isn’t an overnight cure to their problems. I liked the “rallying the troops” tone of the original post, which is what I meant by “rousing”. Maybe that’s just an Anglo-American misunderstanding.
I didn’t for a minute expect that an alcoholic would stop drinking because of this thread. I know enough about alcoholism to realise that I certainly don’t have anything like that amount of power.
Oh, and by the way, I am far from unhappy. Admittedly, this is because I have decided that I cannot live with an alcoholic, early recovering or otherwise, and have broken out of my codie bonds and leapt into the arms of recovery.
I am off to find my spot……
I wrote most of this to put on the “General” thread, but it was closed before I had a chance to post. However, I feel that I want to clarify a few things and then maybe we can go back to normal (Ha!). For the record, I don’t post on the Alcoholism board very often, but I do read it every day. I feel that if we stick to our own “camps” then we lose the opportunity for education and growth.
I posted the thread for two reasons.
Firstly, because the image of even a General being able to tell alcoholics anything made me chuckle. I am glad that there are people on these boards who I can share that with.
But I admit to a subtext - I got weary of reading stories by (mainly) women who are doing everything in their power to keep their families together, working 2 or more jobs, running around after the kids, whilst their partner spends the house-keeping on booze and sits on the couch all day. Do you know how hard it is to see an escape from that life when you haven’t got a minute in the day for yourself?
Tracey, I’m sorry (for you) that you find the Friends and Family Forum “dreadful”. This is often the only lifeline these people have. They often can’t get to meetings because they can’t trust their partner to be sober enough to watch the kids. Those of us who are a bit further down the road do our best to help them see that their situation isn’t hopeless, but there isn’t an overnight cure to their problems. I liked the “rallying the troops” tone of the original post, which is what I meant by “rousing”. Maybe that’s just an Anglo-American misunderstanding.
I didn’t for a minute expect that an alcoholic would stop drinking because of this thread. I know enough about alcoholism to realise that I certainly don’t have anything like that amount of power.
Oh, and by the way, I am far from unhappy. Admittedly, this is because I have decided that I cannot live with an alcoholic, early recovering or otherwise, and have broken out of my codie bonds and leapt into the arms of recovery.
I am off to find my spot……
Member
Join Date: Jan 2005
Location: Concord, CA
Posts: 1,910
First, let me appologize to everyone for my comment on your post, I was feeling a tad neurotic, and bitter that day after consuming an entire box of chocolate covered honeycomb...after I'd sworn to start my Atkins regimine again, of course. :lumpy Achb, don't take what I said personally, it's not about you...
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