Richey

Got back yesterday actually...but felt too exhausted to post. Now it's 6am and I'm insomnified (I know that's not a word, but it should be)...so I thought I'd say 'hi' ...which is actually ********...as I actually came here because I have a quatre bottle of whiskey staring at me that I keep smelling and dipping my finger in a sucking it off...and I feel so pathetic I could cry.

TracyAgain

Richey, throw it away and go to a meeting.

Tracy

TracyAgain

This is the AA contact number for London: (020) 7833 0022.

Call it.

Tracy

Richey

The stupidest thing is...I did such horrible things to earn this stupid bottle...in a way I can't bare to throw it out....and I know it's stupid...STUPID ******* STUPID! argh...

there's no meetings at 6am...I'm shoveling sleeping pills into me but I can't sleep...I can't take my mind off it. it's so pathetic.

TracyAgain

There's always someone answering the phone. (020) 7833 0022.

Tracy

Richey

thank you

TracyAgain

You're welcome. Write back and tell us that you picked up the 800 pound phone. People here are pulling for you.

Tracy

Don S

Take care of yourself, Richey, and please stop beating yourself down. Detox got you to a point where you can now focus on the reasons you want to drink in the first place. Support from others can help a LOT. So make the calls, get in touch with the folks we talked about before, and please start planning for how you're going to make healthy decisions.
Did you make an appointment with a counselor?
Keep posting, ok?
Don S

blitz

You have been sucking your finger and feeling pathetic.

I once drank a whole bottle of beer, opened a second one and broke it on the ground and threw away 2 more. After the first bottle I felt angry; how on earth, after 2 detox, doctors, rehab programm, dissulfirame and 3 years of alcoholism could I feel anything but angry at myself?

This is the time for you to be strong and throw those bottles away (don´t break them, you're at home and I wasn't), call A/A, maybe do both at the same time.

Don't pick up now it's too stupid, you said it yoursef.

Best of luck and keep us posted-Pedro

blitz

Hi Richey, it's me again. Just remember you said you were shoveling sleeping pills. It could be life-endangering to mix them with booze, and you probably know it.

Take Care - Pedro

Time2Surrender

Welcome back Richey. What did you do to earn your sobriety? Pour the whiskey out! Nothing good can come from saving it.

Chy

Welcome back Richey, you didn't go through detox to start all over again! *hugs*

Anna

Richey, I'm glad you're back. It's hard when we've sobered up enough to look at all the messes we've made. I know how you feel but drinking won't help anything. Hang in there.

Love, Anna

CarolD

have a good cry while you pour out the bottle.
:shysmile:
Then....a warm bath and to bed.


Tomorrow will be better if you do not drink!!!

Patsyd1

Hey Richie, nice to see you back. I would suggest going to your phone book and look up "Alcoholics Anonymous", call that number, and find out where the nearest AA meeting is in your area, and then go.

Val-light

Tap, tap....throw the alcohol away Richey.
Val

2dayzmuse

Don't jump back into that viscous cycle again. Make those calls and keep coming back.

GettingSober

Standard recomendation for insomnia.

Workout hard during day.

Eat a bunch after downing 2 melatonins.

Lie down in front room with lights off and see what parts are unable to relax, stretch on the uncomfortable floor with heat off and room cooling, repeat relaxing until you want a warm bed to crash in......

jlo34

Richey,
Hopefully you are still with us.

I went to a noon meeting today and wanted to share with you what a new person said. He said that he was in an accident back on November 21, 2004. His car vs. a semi-truck. His car went underneath the semi and he was flown to the nearest trauma center with 8 broken ribs, lacerated spleen, a few more damaged internal organs, and a massive laceration to his face (still visible) going from his eye jaggedly circling around to his ear. He felt fortunate that he had survived. He was grateful he had survived so he has the opportunity to change and be a good (sober) father for his 10 year old.

I woke up this morning and had a brief thought of drinking this morning. I thought that a 1/5 of Jack Daniels sounded pretty good. I wondered what it tasted like (it's been nearly 14 years since my last drink of alcohol). I wondered what it would be like to be drunk again. I wondered what it would be like to NOT be responsible and do what people thought or expected me to do...then I prayed, got in the shower and got ready for my morning meeting. Had a great table and then decided to make it to the noon meeting where I heard the story from above.

This gentleman shared that he's been in and out of AA for many years, he tearfully exclaimed his sincerity at staying sober this time. He has decided (just for today) that sobriety is more important than drinking. Looking into his eyes, I would have to believe him (just for today). I made sure I thanked him for helping me to stay sober another day and told him no matter what, don't forget how you feel right this moment. With all the conviction he had at staying sober. That he too, could enjoy a life of sobriety wilder than his wildest dreams.

Coincidence, I don't think so. I've been saying prayers for you Richey, and I will continue to.

I pray that you will find your way and you will find your path.
Love,
Jen

progress

Welcome back Richey! Please tell us you threw the bottle away.