blackpearl

I am new to this this and very confused. This is my second time at trying to get sober and stay sober but I just can't seem to get pass the 6 month thing. I knew what went wrong the first time, the second time, i was making meeting calling people but still ended up taking a drink and for me, having one is never enough. Can someone really explain to me how this works? Because of my work and my children I am not able to always make the noon meetings like I want and I am in a new area trying to get awasy from the people places and things I thought were abling me to get drunk and stay there only to find out that it is me that I need to change. I'm scared, lonely, and very confused.
CAN SOMEONE PLEASE POINT ME IN THE RIGHT DIRECTION?

Fadedwaste

only you can point yourself in the right direction, sure meetings and people on this board can help be pointing out your flaws and telling you how great life is sober but only if you have the strength and willpower to say "I am never going to do this, no matter how hard it is" and actually follow through. I'm still heavily struggling with alcohol and as well have a child. I am trying to go to as many meetings as possible. During all this I am gradually building up the will power to put the bottle down for good...a few days of sobriety here and there eventually will lead me to that light. Your time will come when you find that light and mine will to.

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sober days counting:3

Morning Glory

Others will be along to share their experience, but I wanted to share some links with you while you're waiting. These are not in any kind of order. If they are about drugs then substitute alcohol. Write down your questions and ask for answers.

Hugs,

MG

http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...&threadid=1211

http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...&threadid=1527

http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...&threadid=1566

http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...&threadid=1453

http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...&threadid=4469

http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...&threadid=1721

http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...&threadid=1295

http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...&threadid=1261

Paulie

Blackpearl -

Do you have a sponsor? Are you working the 12 steps. that is my suggestion to you, do these things. Do whatever someone that came before you in the program suggests that you do.

You have to put your recovery first. that is the only direction that I can give you.

Keep posting - read the threads that MG pointed you to, they will help you understand what you are feeling. It is normal to be scared and confused, it sucks but it is normal. Go to as many meetings as you possibly can and if you can share at the meetings, if you are not comforatble doing that, then just listen.

Stick around - it will get better I promise.

blackpearl

THANKS FOR ALL THE ADVICE!

No I don't have a sponsor yet.. I have a hard time trusting women so it is taking me some time to find one I can "let my hair down" with... As for working the steps, the traditions, that is where I get confused.. I don't know how to begin to work them, I know I need a sponsor to give me this direction but it is about trust.
I have been fortunate enough that the jobs I have gotten where I live at now, they have been with recovering people who don't mind sharing their story which has been a big help. I am going to check out the other threads because what i have seen so far REALLY helped me get through a time when there is no meeting to go to.

THANKS... AND I WILL KEEP COMING BACK...

Morning Glory

We're glad to have you here blackpearl and the same goes for you fadedwaste. I hope the links are helpful. If you have any questions, please feel free to ask others.

There have been a lot of things that I don't understand and I just jump right in and ask. Then sometimes I don't understand the answer and have to ask what the answer meant.

I process information the hard way.

Hugs,

MG

blackpearl

I don't know how I found this site
but I am sooooo glad I did. I guess what kept me going back to drinking.. my pride kept me from asking and reaching out but now i don't want to live the way I have been I want to be sober, learn how to be a mother.. and actually be productive.. They said at a meeting that I didn't become an alocholic in a day and it is not going to take a day to get sober... thanks for posting!