11 years sober and i wanted to drink yest
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Join Date: Jun 2012
Posts: 5,229
11 years sober and i wanted to drink yest
i was in a gas station and they had some mad dog colorful looking stuff and fire ball all stuff i n ever got to have back in the day so my AV is like see you got cheated.... i'm reading the labels it says 12% i was bombarded by it or at least felt like i was it was all over and then they had wine as well. The wheels where really turning.
now most of the time i go out i dont have to face it. most places i m at dont have it. but my local grocery store is going to start carring booze now too and i'm like awe come on. I wont lie when i go into a place where its prevalent the wheels turn. usually i just see it as a fantasy. But those little colorful bottles that are high alcohol and seem so easy to hide are tempting the heck out of me when i'm in those places.
I'm hoping this is just a blip on the radar and i dont feel as strongly pulled to it next time as I was yest. I got to thinking too is that how an accident will happen? will i mindlessly grab a bottle and go for it one day? i'd hate to think i'd be so mindless about it but i dunno. Or if it was so prevalent would it be easier for me to say screw it on a bad day?
its concerning yest was concerning. any advice welcome.
now most of the time i go out i dont have to face it. most places i m at dont have it. but my local grocery store is going to start carring booze now too and i'm like awe come on. I wont lie when i go into a place where its prevalent the wheels turn. usually i just see it as a fantasy. But those little colorful bottles that are high alcohol and seem so easy to hide are tempting the heck out of me when i'm in those places.
I'm hoping this is just a blip on the radar and i dont feel as strongly pulled to it next time as I was yest. I got to thinking too is that how an accident will happen? will i mindlessly grab a bottle and go for it one day? i'd hate to think i'd be so mindless about it but i dunno. Or if it was so prevalent would it be easier for me to say screw it on a bad day?
its concerning yest was concerning. any advice welcome.
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Join Date: May 2012
Posts: 3,748
I think its wonderful you came here and posted instead of drinking. This forum is a great tool.
I dont think you were cheated, although I do understand the sentiment. Its all the same whether it be in a shiny bright labeled bottle, or it be in a jug buried in the dirt, it is alcohol. What brought you to sobriety? What other tools are using to remain steady and solid in your recovered state? This will be a blip of thought if you let it be a blip of thought. It cant go any further unless you take steps into making a reality.
I dont think you were cheated, although I do understand the sentiment. Its all the same whether it be in a shiny bright labeled bottle, or it be in a jug buried in the dirt, it is alcohol. What brought you to sobriety? What other tools are using to remain steady and solid in your recovered state? This will be a blip of thought if you let it be a blip of thought. It cant go any further unless you take steps into making a reality.
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Join Date: Mar 2014
Posts: 25,373
I live in a state that used to only sell hard alcohol in State run liquor stores.
When we started selling it everywhere (maybe 12 years ago or so??) I noticed my drinking increased. It was silly, because I used to live in Nevada and California and both those states sell it everywhere and I didn't drink more because it was in a grocery store. I drank more because I liked to drink.
These days in my state the liquor section of the store is right next to the Produce and it's huge. No way to avoid it, so yeah, it's harder when it's in your face and you may have a few little twinges when your grocery store starts selling it - but you'll get through that just like all the zillions of other, "A drink would be good," thoughts that come up. I just don't pay it any more attention than the ice cream aisle. Also an issue!!
*A* drink would never happen.
You and I both know that.
Nice to "see" you.
When we started selling it everywhere (maybe 12 years ago or so??) I noticed my drinking increased. It was silly, because I used to live in Nevada and California and both those states sell it everywhere and I didn't drink more because it was in a grocery store. I drank more because I liked to drink.
These days in my state the liquor section of the store is right next to the Produce and it's huge. No way to avoid it, so yeah, it's harder when it's in your face and you may have a few little twinges when your grocery store starts selling it - but you'll get through that just like all the zillions of other, "A drink would be good," thoughts that come up. I just don't pay it any more attention than the ice cream aisle. Also an issue!!
*A* drink would never happen.
You and I both know that.
Nice to "see" you.
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Jun 2012
Posts: 5,229
Originally Posted by biminiblue 
I live in a state that used to only sell hard alcohol in State run liquor stores.
When we started selling it everywhere (maybe 12 years ago or so??) I noticed my drinking increased. It was silly, because I used to live in Nevada and California and both those states sell it everywhere and I didn't drink more because it was in a grocery store. I drank more because I liked to drink.
These days in my state the liquor section of the store is right next to the Produce and it's huge. No way to avoid it, so yeah, it's harder when it's in your face and you may have a few little twinges when your grocery store starts selling it - but you'll get through that just like all the zillions of other, "A drink would be good," thoughts that come up. I just don't pay it any more attention than the ice cream aisle. Also an issue!!
*A* drink would never happen.
You and I both know that.
Nice to "see" you.
When we started selling it everywhere (maybe 12 years ago or so??) I noticed my drinking increased. It was silly, because I used to live in Nevada and California and both those states sell it everywhere and I didn't drink more because it was in a grocery store. I drank more because I liked to drink.
These days in my state the liquor section of the store is right next to the Produce and it's huge. No way to avoid it, so yeah, it's harder when it's in your face and you may have a few little twinges when your grocery store starts selling it - but you'll get through that just like all the zillions of other, "A drink would be good," thoughts that come up. I just don't pay it any more attention than the ice cream aisle. Also an issue!!
*A* drink would never happen.
You and I both know that.
Nice to "see" you.
Yeh i'll just have to push through all that like i do all the other times i've had to say no. I've been fortunate thus far that its been easier in this regard. I hate to be such a sensitive snow flake about it too. but geeze it really got me yest.
p***enger
Join Date: Nov 2012
Location: NYC
Posts: 19,042
Getting surprised by liquor is the worst. Me, I get to thinking something like my walk home is easy-peasy, and put down my guard, and maybe my tools have got a little rusty because I've shaped my life so I don't have to use them every day -- and bam! caught off guard. It might be sign for a new brand I never tried -- "I wonder what's that like?" As if maybe there was one special kind of booze I wasn't hooked on.
An alcoholic's thoughts about liquor are just plain ridiculous. Rule 62.
An alcoholic's thoughts about liquor are just plain ridiculous. Rule 62.
Member
Join Date: May 2010
Location: East Coast
Posts: 1,906
It's been a loooooong time since I had a craving but I get destructive thinking all of the time. What always helps me is thinking through the relapse. Not just the first sip or the first couple of hours but when my body goes into full addict mode again and suddenly is willing to throw away everything I've been living for. That feeling of hopelessness I had....that feeling like I was always about ready to jump out of my skin. The shame. The sadness. The anger and rage. The shaking and seizures. Throwing up all the time. The insomnia-The liver disease. The hell? -no thanks.
After thinking all of that through-What am I really missing out on? Not a GD thing.
hope that helps.
After thinking all of that through-What am I really missing out on? Not a GD thing.
hope that helps.
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Join Date: May 2012
Location: Wisconsin, USA
Posts: 16,945
I am coming up on 10 years and freely admit I still have those kinds of thoughts occasionally. I drank every day for almost a quarter century so I doubt all that will ever be completely erased from my mind ;-) But as Dee accurately points out, there are just thoughts - and what matters most is how you act on them. You recognized them for what they were, came here to talk it through, and made it through just fine - i'd call that a win across the board.
Free.
Join Date: Apr 2020
Location: Saskatchewan.
Posts: 2,972
Yes, zjw, the sparkling display items can be very tempting.
I’ve been stopped in my tracks too once.
The truth is that alcohol is a life-shattering poison for us. Period.
Always best to see the truth about how destructive ANY amount of alcohol is in our lives.
I sometimes will reflect on a couple of mental images of the worst places booze has taken me.
Irrefutable.
I’ve been stopped in my tracks too once.
The truth is that alcohol is a life-shattering poison for us. Period.
Always best to see the truth about how destructive ANY amount of alcohol is in our lives.
I sometimes will reflect on a couple of mental images of the worst places booze has taken me.
Irrefutable.
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Jun 2012
Posts: 5,229
Thanks guys. Yeh I guess it’s just normal for folks like us to have these kinds of thoughts.
i just gotta the swallow the pill that I won’t ever be cured. I’ll most likely always have to work at this to some degree. Sometimes it’s easy sometimes it’s hard either way the more forward I go the more progresss I seem to make despite the difficulty.
is what it is I guess.
i just gotta the swallow the pill that I won’t ever be cured. I’ll most likely always have to work at this to some degree. Sometimes it’s easy sometimes it’s hard either way the more forward I go the more progresss I seem to make despite the difficulty.
is what it is I guess.
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Join Date: May 2014
Location: Kerry, Ireland
Posts: 2,703
Originally Posted by Dee74
Thoughts are thoughts - its what we do with those thoughts that counts zjw
D
D
sure that thought doesn't turn in a bad action.
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Join Date: Oct 2019
Posts: 259
I have wondered what it would be like to drink again and each time I know there is no stopping for me until I pass out cold. Even to think of drinking now, I don't see the point of having 2 beers and white knuckling it for the rest of the night. Its easier for me to never even start that whole downward spiral.
Like Bulldog said above, its really easy for me to recall how the night will go if I take one drink. There is no mystery about it.
Like Bulldog said above, its really easy for me to recall how the night will go if I take one drink. There is no mystery about it.
voices ca**y
Join Date: Mar 2013
Location: St. Paul Minnesota
Posts: 4,360
I feel the same way about Fireball. I could have got myself into so much trouble with that and I never even got to try it. Not really tho. I am ecstatic I made it out in one piece.
I get the thing with having to see the bottles. At about a year sober I went to Chicago and was unexpectedly confronted with a giant wall of booze in a drug store. I'm glad that Minnesota isn't like that. I completely forgot there is even such a thing as alcoholic and then have to be reminded of it.
I get the thing with having to see the bottles. At about a year sober I went to Chicago and was unexpectedly confronted with a giant wall of booze in a drug store. I'm glad that Minnesota isn't like that. I completely forgot there is even such a thing as alcoholic and then have to be reminded of it.
it's all happening
Join Date: Sep 2009
Location: Ann Arbor, Mich.
Posts: 125
It was so nice of your brain to remind you that you're an alcoholic! I always take these thoughts as a reminder that I can't drink like normal people do. Who looks at MAD DOG of all things and thinks, "Yum, I want a piece of that"? Mad Dog is awful, LOL.
When I see someone drinking and I have a brief pang of regret, wishing I could drink like that, I let my brain show me how I would drink that stuff. For me, I would be knocking down an entire bottle of wine as quickly as I could drink it. Just unhinge my jaw and pour it in. I think about that for a second and then am grateful for the reminder that I still have a problem with drinking.
I guess maybe one day I'll look at a glass of something and think, "Oh, one of those would be nice." But for now, I'm not there. And it looks like you aren't there either. Thanks, brains!
When I see someone drinking and I have a brief pang of regret, wishing I could drink like that, I let my brain show me how I would drink that stuff. For me, I would be knocking down an entire bottle of wine as quickly as I could drink it. Just unhinge my jaw and pour it in. I think about that for a second and then am grateful for the reminder that I still have a problem with drinking.
I guess maybe one day I'll look at a glass of something and think, "Oh, one of those would be nice." But for now, I'm not there. And it looks like you aren't there either. Thanks, brains!
Member
Join Date: Jun 2013
Posts: 568
11 years is amazing! Congratulations on all your hard work!
I went into a liquor store for my 4th of July party we throw and bought a bunch of hard liquor and beer for the party. I had the same strange thoughts about how pretty the bottles looked and also the smell in the liquor store triggered me. I can honestly say it was a difficult moment for me. I got everyone's liquor and then bought myself some pretty pricy entertaining nuts.! LOL No one complained and I protected them and ate them all when I got home.
I went into a liquor store for my 4th of July party we throw and bought a bunch of hard liquor and beer for the party. I had the same strange thoughts about how pretty the bottles looked and also the smell in the liquor store triggered me. I can honestly say it was a difficult moment for me. I got everyone's liquor and then bought myself some pretty pricy entertaining nuts.! LOL No one complained and I protected them and ate them all when I got home.
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