8 years and six months but on the pity pot
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Aug 2013
Location: TN
Posts: 365
8 years and six months but on the pity pot
Hi there, missed my monthly reminder to myself on the 20th of the month. I have had a great birthday today, but ended up fighting some pity pot thinking. I guess because I got reminded yesterday about my drinking life and how much it has cost me over the years, financially, healthwise, emotionally and you name it. I was involvd in a bar fight in my youth about 33 years ago. My dentist at the time was able to save my four front teeth in both upper and lower jaw. It cost a pretty penny even back then and after root canals I was able to carry on with my life. Although I kept drinking and had dui's and other alcohol related problems. Yesterday, at the regular dental checkup they noticed that one of the teeth is starting to come lose and I will eventually end up with implants which will be tremendously expensive. I'm not upset about the cost per se, it's just that it's so unneccessary. The money I have to spend on this could be used for something a lot more worthwhile. Donation to charity, or whatever. But this is the nature of alcoholism. Even after more than 8 years of sobriety, I have to pay the cost for my stupid decision to live a drinking life. So after a couple of hours last night and this morning with a pity pot session, I did what I did 8 years and sxix months ago. I did a mental inventory and decided that enough is enough. Be grateful that you have experienced another birthday. I have a home, a car and a wife. I have some health problems due to drinking, but they are manageable. So I end up this day with being grateful for that fateful day in July of 2013 when I had moment of clarity and put the drink down for good. If you are young and reading this, or old for that matter, please put the drink down. It's not worth it. You can end up with all kinds of problems which are for the most part avoidable if you don't drink. Take charge of your life and realize that if you are on this forum, you can't control drinking and moderation is a myth. Stay safe and thanks for reading.
And gratitude has saved me many times too. 
Member
Join Date: May 2021
Location: England
Posts: 1,850
Thank you for your insight, it's good to read and take stock of what had been, it sounds like you turned your life around at the right moment, the last moment even. I feel the same way, so much has been lost, but so much has been saved and will be saved through sobriety
Member
Join Date: Jun 2013
Location: Sonoran Desert & Southeast Asia
Posts: 6,561
Thanks for the post, TN Man, and happy birthday! We all have regrets - lots of them. I was a month behind you (class of Aug 2013) and made it over 3 years but my bad thinking got to me and I picked up again in early 2017. Ironically, it was on a trip to Chiang Mai, Thailand to have a gold crown put on. Fantastic dentist, saved me a fortune. Modern office, etc. If you need a lot of work the savings would pay for your trip to an amazing part of the world.
Anyway, best to you, appreciate your regular monthly posts so much.
Anyway, best to you, appreciate your regular monthly posts so much.
Member
Join Date: Nov 2018
Posts: 67
Thankyou for your post - It came as quite a shock as I am currently firmly on the same pity pot.
I have spent the last 8 months and £15,000 to repair my dentistry. 20 years of drinking, smoking, cocaine and neglect left my teeth as a visible reminder of my past. This is a lot of money for me, I won’t starve but I’ve had to forgo many things to get it together.
It has not gone to plan. I made a poor choice of dentist who I believe has cheated me or exaggerated his competence. The finished result is wrong cosmetically and wrong clinically.
I have been as close to relapse as I have been in 3 years sober. In the sense of - what’s the point, I can’t get anything right.
I have the meeting with the dentist tomorrow which is going to involve conflict which I hate, and I’m not good at. I’m worried I will just lay down and take it, be cheated and think it’s all I deserve - an attitude that kept me drinking for far longer than made any sense.
Thankyou for posting and you’ve made me reframe these problems in the light of still clearing up from the past
I have spent the last 8 months and £15,000 to repair my dentistry. 20 years of drinking, smoking, cocaine and neglect left my teeth as a visible reminder of my past. This is a lot of money for me, I won’t starve but I’ve had to forgo many things to get it together.
It has not gone to plan. I made a poor choice of dentist who I believe has cheated me or exaggerated his competence. The finished result is wrong cosmetically and wrong clinically.
I have been as close to relapse as I have been in 3 years sober. In the sense of - what’s the point, I can’t get anything right.
I have the meeting with the dentist tomorrow which is going to involve conflict which I hate, and I’m not good at. I’m worried I will just lay down and take it, be cheated and think it’s all I deserve - an attitude that kept me drinking for far longer than made any sense.
Thankyou for posting and you’ve made me reframe these problems in the light of still clearing up from the past
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