Sick again
 

I keep getting sick I was sick for 2 weeks a and just got over it 2 weeks ago. I was sick for 2 weeks in September. I'm not sick for 3 time with the worse sore throat I've ever had, I was at urgent care were wasn't given covid test I tested negative for strep. I do have tonsils problems. I'm sick and I have to work. My boss will Give me a hard time if I call in. Emotionally I'm doing better but physically I feel terrible. I feel like I'm sick constantly. Just as I started to feel good bam sick again.
David

I hope you feel better soon David.
Did they give you anything or suggest anything at Urgent Care?

D

David that’s rough getting sick like that! I feel bad for you! Hope you feel better!

Said it was a virus I was to afraid to ask for covid test..also each time I've gotten sick I start feeling depressed. I have to work full time this week and I've barely worked for months because of the hotel being really slow. The thing is I can't sleep at night until 2 30am then I need to get up at 7 45 am. I have been sleeping most of my days off all day unless I go skiing. To catch up on my sleep which really screws up my sleep schedule. I'm almost ready to just quit my job. If I did I'd probably start sleeping every day till 4
pm. My sleep doc told Me to stick to a sleep schedule but i can't make my self do it.. it's strange yesterday I felt grate but today I feel do bad. I also gained 55 pounds in the last couple of years. I'm currently eating compulsively it's all I can do to stay sober. When I want to drink I eat something else eating out control I can't stop. Im so anxious at night I pace for hours. I think being over weight is causing a lot of problems. My doctor diagnosed me with class 2 obesity with cormiditys. I have sleep apena and high blood pressure. I afraid diabetes is coming next. My a1c has slowly crept up even though is in the technical normal range with an average blood sugar of 120. People at aa say when I mention my diet better than drinking. I probably 500 grams of sugar a day. Once I start I can't stop. I live with my parents and the house is full of sugar. It's Also full of booze so many bottles of booze .
I generally don't want to drink but I have these thoughts I need to escape my worry. I'm sorry for ranting. I don't plan on drinking but it's definitely on my mind. At the same time I can't remember the bad times when I was drinking and hopeless it feels like a dream that wasn't real. The memory is fuzzy to me. I don't want to drink but at the same time I do. I missed a meeting today because I was sick and it really is messing with my mind. I have a very hard time being honest with my self and others how I feel. I just dont know what you say. Also if I say u
I want to drink they say what lacking in your program. I've been doing the steps but still I crave it. I also have a history of chronic relapse. I'm going to keep giving this soberity thing a chance give at least 2 years before I make any judgments. I know I want to drink because I'm an alcoholic that knowledge I'm very grateful for. I'm glad I'm no longer in denial. When I feel bad it's natural for that myself as a person in addition to want to drink. Posting here has helped clarify in my mind what I really want.
David

I called in sick left a voice message. I'm not going in to work sick anymore. I went in sick so many times . It'd irresponsible and not my problem if thier isn't enough workers I'm sick and sick people shouldn't be spreading thier sickness around. I'm standing up for my self now. One of my Character defects is being a people pleaser. It's dishonest to people please. No one respects a people pleaser. Honesty Is the best policy. A lot my problems are caused by me not being honest.
David

Hey David, I think alot of reasons we're tempting to drink has alot to do with the way alcohol is marketed to us. It's always been marketed as a good thing, a drink you're offered with a meal, and we are told we are the problem because we can't "handle" this good thing. Even alot of programs have this reasoning. One program I was in blamed it on something Hereditary or brain chemistry. Alcohol is a drug, and it's just as dangerous and even more so than some "harder drugs". It's become a huge part of culture which is why no one says this, but alcohol isn't really good for anyone. The buzz it provides doesn't last long, in order to prolong it you risk blacking out/losing control of yourself. It makes horrible decisions seem great. The next day you end up sick and you can't remember anything. If that isn't bad enough, the more you continue to drink through life the shorter that buzz last due to tolerance, and the more you end up blacking out. It's just a very lame drug in my opinion.

Hope you feel better, I was sick for the entire month of September, I couldn't talk the entire month.

It can feel like you've been sick for ages but you sounded pretty good in your last thread. I'm sure you'll feel good again soon.
maybe you caught a chill when you went skiing or something David.

D

David that’s rough! Being sick is miserable and can put you in a state of mind that’s bad for your recovery! Be careful! Know that this will pass! I wish I could say more on medical but we’re not allowed to give medical advice on this forum! Hang in there buddy!

Excellent analysis! Thanks!

I agree wholeheartedly with this! I tried to say something similar on a different thread, but you summed up my thinking much more to the point. Alcohol is no good for anyone, we've been sold a lot of lies.

And David, I do hope you feel better!!