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Creating New Habits

Old 11-25-2022, 10:29 AM
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Happy Thanksgiving, Everyone!

Im doing well, Advbike. Ive been away from online stuff for a bit. Absorbed in writing in the mornings, work, write, then wake up and do it all over again. Life is good. Nothing dramatic or over the top has happened. My last post may have eluded to something going on, but life has surprised me in such a good way. Our heads can sometimes get away from us/ me. My head.....It likes to create chorus numbers and sometimes I listen to the song it sings, and watch the dance it dances.

Im getting better at not listening and not participating in the over the top antics.

I was on the wine aisle yesterday talking to the worker. Looking at all the bottles that I once drank on repeat. After a minute of standing there I thought that this little place is not a safe place for me. I abruptly ended the conversation and went back to my work. I didnt have cravings, or thoughts that I could or should drink. I just knew the conversation needed to end. "Ya, bye. Im going to go where I am supposed to be and where I am supposed to be is not here!"

Other than that.... Im just hammering away on this keyboard for hours on end. Editing the hours of words. A story is being written in a fashion that is whimsical and telling of how my brain works. So far so good. Also, the anxiety has all but left once I started to focus on a different story to tell. So, I think I learned something there...... Focus on a different story.

How is everyone doing?
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Old 11-25-2022, 02:14 PM
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Yay for you, Mizz! So happy to hear you're doing well and making positive changes, haha. Keep it going!

All good here, a lot on the plate (literally and figuratively, haha). If I don't stop eating pie my bike tires will go flat.

I just love your positive attitude!
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Old 11-25-2022, 11:05 PM
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Good to hear from you, Mizz. My spouse and I are suffering from long Covid, in other words coughing every now and then, so I need to scale back exercise. Apart from that life is good, the young tom we got a couple of months ago is now a part of the family and the adult cats like him. The little guy's a lot of fun.
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Old 11-26-2022, 06:03 AM
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Advbike- Life sounds busy for you. I hope its all a good busy. No one likes to be busy in a bad way! haha
It looks like you are making plans to head back over seas? How's that coming along? How's the house over there?

As for the eating.....Ya, I had loads of food yesterday and slept for a very long time. This past week was BUSY and a bit overstimulating with all the customers and flowers. Carving out squashes and making centerpiece arrangements. Its great work but its also very tiring.

Plop- Im sorry to hear about long COVID. Its horrible for the individuals who have it. Sending all the healing vibes I can to you and yours. I didnt have long covid but the COVID I did have took away every last bit of energy I had. I really hope you two are on the tail end of this and getting back to healthy and happy.

A young tom! Wonderful. The felines are such a joy. My girl cat shows bursts of young energy every now and then. I remember how fun it was to see her zooming around doing her exercises through the house for hours on end. The boy cat was born an old man. He never zoomed or played like the little Miss.

Its also really good to hear your other cats have accepted the little one. We all know how territorial cats can be! The "this is mine" attitude can be next level at times. Extra. So, Im happy for you, the spouse, and the three felines!

Exercise. Well, I have also scaled back with running and weights. My legs started hurting the other day and I knew it was from the lack of running. So, I got on the mill for a 30 minute jog. Leg pain went away immediately. Its been good for me to not participate in the obsessiveness. The best part is that I am mentally and emotionally fine with it. Ill get back to all of that when my body tells me that its time.... Most likely today. I love running. So, I cant let the running get too far away as its the leveler for this life I live.

Stay warm everyone.
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Old 11-29-2022, 08:27 PM
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Hi Mizz, glad to hear you had a good Thanksgiving and got plenty of sleep - yay! What a blessing sleep is. When I get 7 or 8 hours I'm overjoyed. Things are going well. Just finished up the travel arrangements for January, staying through March. Great time of year - cooler and not much rain. The visit this past summer was pretty brutal with all the heat, humidity and smoke. The house is coming along. Still needs a kitchen and paint inside and out, something for me to be involved with while I'm there. The tile work is all done inside and also on the long balcony, so that's the best spot.

I have also had some knee pain from an overuse injury in my left knee - rode 50 miles the other day.. my normal is about 25-30.. and felt it a day or two later. What a goofball I am. Have to work up to those distances. So it goes with us of us who love our endurance activities.

Have a great week doing all those amazing and talented things you do!
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Old 12-07-2022, 07:39 AM
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Everything is moving along. I spent a great deal of time last week creating structure in the areas I manage. Writing out a comprehensive guide for all the tasks we need to accomplish. With guidance and a detailed format there is no reason that we cant accomplish our work.

With all the different personalities it can be hard to figure out how people learn and thrive. So, I am taking all the steps necessary to empower others. Some implementation had resistance. Some implementation created headway. Some implementation had people in tears and big reactions. So, I keep throwing structure at the wall to see if it sticks. No one can say I am not trying as hard as I can to make all the areas stay afloat. With the structure, I am hopeful the people I manage rise to the challenge with a spirit that they will never be defeated.

I held a team meeting with the new and improved structure. I created a communication log and we write in it daily. I printed and reprinted the structured guide. Then I wrote everyone else a structured guide for their departments (just kidding) lol!

Actually, my spouse said "You wrote a guide for your areas and then wrote a guide for everyone else's areas, Then you wrote a guide on how to follow the guide for your areas and everyone else's areas!" One of my coworkers rolled her eyes in a loving way at the new "Comprehensive Guide."

She may think I am over achieving or she may have to write her own guide in the future. Not my problem. I will not work in chaos even though the environment is 100% chaotic. We will succeed by identifying our challenges and finding solutions. We march into our future feeling accomplished and feeling empowered.

All of that being said, last week was rough. The above is the happy version. I was walking through sludge for a few days. A person might ask why this structure did not exist before? Pandemics can really turn everyone's world upside down.

advbike- I hope your knee is feeling better. I like hearing about all that is going on with your new home. It sounds like it has really kept you busy. You certainly juggle a lot everyday. Keep on moving forward. Are you painting the home yourself or hiring?






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Old 12-08-2022, 03:12 AM
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I loved this:

I will not work in chaos even though the environment is 100% chaotic. We will succeed by identifying our challenges and finding solutions. We march into our future feeling accomplished and feeling empowered.

X

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Old 12-09-2022, 07:35 AM
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Anuual Review:
I got a stellar report card from work. I hate reviews. A few years back, my review was so bad I wondered how I was still employed at this company. I mean, my head was chopped off and thrown in the ocean by the GM. He laughed manically as it floated out to sea. In hindsight, I probably deserved a last paycheck. This was when wine and Mizz were best friends. So, thanks GM for keeping me employed and for believing in me.

This year though.....All areas were excellent or distinguished. One area was "meets expectations" but I cant force people to buy high end supplements and I cant help that spending habits are different. "Lets see....Do I buy "49.00 in fish oil or do I buy gas and bread? Do I starve myself so my face looks awesome from this high end face cream, or do I get some oatmeal and coffee?" Hard decisions to make. My manager knows this and felt some kind of way with the "meets expectations" and I certainly agree that I am only meeting expectations with all the millions of bottles that are not selling..... That being said, I have been diligently working towards bringing in less expensive products.

We reset our floral area yesterday. Customers come into our work space. Unload their pockets or in this case their fanny pack. Take over the area. We try to work around them. "Excuse me" as we bob and weave through. "Will you please stand over here?" Then there is frustration from the customers and frustration from the employees. Then there is an encounter with a man. Then the man complains. Then Mizz gets pissed off due to not having space to work and also that this man complained to management.

So, yesterday we set about to make a change. A structured divide letting the customers know where they can stand and where the workers work. "This is your space. This is our space" Then i walk around like Im Vanna White with my arms extending showing management the spaces we created. "Im not sure what the owner will say" says one manager. "Great. Thats just ******* great! Send him that one Bob Dylan song about the "TIMES ARE A CHANGIN" Cause the times, they are a changin.

Having a work space is a necessity. Having a space for the customers is a necessity. We can do both. We dont have to suffer or have customers complain. We dont have to exist this way just because we have always existed in this way. i know...Change is hard. So hard. I certainly know about making changes and how hard it was to adjust to the change. Ill find a different solution if the owner gives it the red light.

Personal year end review:
Im healthy. My eye does not have cancer. I am sober. I am writing. I have new boots. The heat is on full blast and I also have a coat to keep me warm out there in the GIANT world. I ran a half marathon.

This year, filled with challenges and personal growth, has been hard and also rewarding. I learned how to say "NO." I learned how to help my anxiety. I learned and then learned some more. I stood up when I fell down. I went to bed when I needed to go to bed. I did not drink one drop of that stuff that rendered me unhealthy and toxic. GO US!

OFF to tackle the world now.














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Old 12-11-2022, 11:41 PM
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What a wonderful report card! You're doing so great , Mizz, and it's all because of that amazing attitude! All the positivity! It even makes me happy!

I forgot to answer your question about the house painting as I've been busy finishing up my way overdue bathroom project here. Because I have company coming next weekend, haha. They will need a guest bathroom. Nothing like a deadline to light a fire under me. I have to say it's gone well, no leaks and my caulking job along the backsplash looks almost professional.. haha. And I got back on the bike today, finally, which felt really good.

So about the painting, we will have it done. Labor is cheap over there so no point in doing it oneself. And they use a special epoxy paint on the concrete. The house is sparsely furnished right now so it's the best time to do it. We have wrapped it up for the year and my GF gave each worker a small bonus this weekend, something we had discussed and which I really wanted to do. These guys do backbreaking work in the heat and humidity and are just happy to get a regular wage. And almost always happy and smiling. She put each one in a nice red embossed envelope with a personal note, it was a very nice touch. Apparently they don't normally get bonuses and were very happy and grateful. I am very grateful that I could help them with 6 months of work and a little bonus at the end. And for a beautiful little house. Just in time for Christmas. My GF and her two sons will spend the holiday there and I will show up in January.

Wishing you a wonderful holiday season, Mizz. Thank you for sharing your amazing journey!
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Old 12-12-2022, 04:31 AM
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How wonderful to catch up, Mizz.

i really enjoy your thread, and love to read your words. What an amazing woman! Organizing through chaos. Boundaries—identifying, verbalizing, and adhering. Tough stuff! Bummer. We didn’t win the gazillion either. We won $4 💰

Scooching out of the wine section when your spidey sensé said “Go, Mizz! Now!” Brilliant.

I used to obsess about exercise, it kept me going for years. I’m so glad you are listening to your body and mind. Amazing what are bodies tell us, that we can hear and listen to, when we are sober.

As for me, I have my ups and downs. I’m up (literally awake I mean), with anxiety, hoping to find out what the heck happened to my black eye (as in shiner, my irises are bright blue), may be having a retinal detachment. We have a call in to the ophthalmologist requesting an urgent appointment today. Otherwise, must go to Denver. Things can always be worse, so not complaining, Just where we live there aren’t specialist 24/7, and I didn’t mention the issue to hubby until Friday bedtime. Ooops.

Meanwhile, I’ll live vicariously through your lovely posts.

Much love, partner ♥️🤓😁

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Old 12-13-2022, 07:00 AM
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Advbike- Good to hear about the house. Also, really good to hear about bonuses and paying a wage that is decent. These things are really important in life. Treating people with kindness, paying decent wages, and making sure people are appreciated is really top notch in my book. This new home of yours sounds really lovely. Im very happy for you. What an impressive situation. I hope you have a great time with your guests!

Free- Your eye situation sounds really frightening. I hope the doc figures out the path forward and you heal quickly. When I read what you said was happening, I let out a tiny shriek. Eye problems are no joke. Please let us know what is happening. Sending all the healing vibes to you.

I head to the town where I was raised today. We are having lunch with my mother. I wont go into all the feelings I have about this. Its a mixed bag of emotions. I put a GIANT bow on the mixed bag, and I will open it when I am consciously trying to have a bad day. Today, I am working towards creating happy memories.

I'm still laughing over the scenario I found myself in yesterday while I was washing my hair. I got a new shampoo. I used the same amount that I always use but this shampoo lathers differently. So, there I was in the shower covered in so many bubbles and frothy lather that I was concerned for myself and the bathroom. It was the gift that kept on giving. Suffice to say, my hair is really clean now. It took some time to get all the bubbles and froth washed away. I should probably warn my spouse or just let him figure it out on his own....... It was epic. Now Im wondering if its actually shampoo in the bottle?!
True story.

Happy day, ALL!





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Old 12-13-2022, 11:29 PM
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Possibly permanent distorted vision, no retinal detachment, but vitreous s’espaçât ion from trauma.

Good news, NOT going blind.

i have a shampoo like that. Olaplex. 😬😅
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Old 12-14-2022, 02:11 PM
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Possible permanent distorted vision? ummmm...... No.
Im sorry to hear this. I hope this is not the case, Free. Your eye hemorrhaged?

I made the trip to the place I was born and back. I got dressed, putting on my best face glow, and then drove 2 1/2 hrs south. Me, my spouse, Brene Brown, and Bono were hanging out for the ride. Great Episodes out now on "Unlocking Us with Brene Brown"

Fortunately, I left my mixed bag of emotions at home so I didn't have an eruption or avalanche in the street. All went as planned.

The landmarks:
1) "To your left you will see a Juvenile Hall. This is where I spent an unspecified amount of time for crimes that were mild in nature. I thought I was going to be locked up for the remainder of my life."

2) "To your right is the studio where I lived. I had to close the curtains due to the man who lived behind me. He liked to look in the windows. It was terrifying. People get arrested for that behavior now. Not in the late 90's though. In the 90's, people just did all kinds of wacky inappropriate stuff. It was like the Wild West around here"

3) "Down this street is where all the cool kids lived. I also shared a studio here with a Punk Rocker. She listened to Black Flag all night long while consuming Natural Ice Beer. Needless to say, I didnt sleep much and I hated my roommate"

4) "That store is where I sold Vintage clothes to all the young twenty somethings... . We now call them Hipsters. I dont know and I dont care what it was called then. I was broke. I worked two jobs. Vintage clothes seller by day and a Waitress by night. I still couldnt afford to pay the $300.00 in rent. I think my priorities were a bit askew..... "

5) " This is the High School. I was supposed to make it here, but life got away from me. Please see landmark ONE for explanation.


That's how the trip went. I also forced my spouse to take a picture with the Golf Course Sign. He was not too pleased that I continually made him smile over and over again. "Just take the Picture, Mizz"

The idea was for him to send the picture to his father who loves this particular golf course. I should probably go and check to see if the picture actually made it to his father. I wont let this idea die!

We ate lunch at a place that had 4.3 stars on Trip Advisor. In my next segment of "Life with Mizz", I will touch base on Restaurant decor, and how sticking to ONE THEME is not only reasonable but advisable. I felt so confused by the aquatic, western, new age, religious, and things that I just cant put a name too everywhere I looked. It was overwhelming but def filled the time while I ate a strange Gorgonzola bread type thing.....

My mother, spouse and I held light conversation and kept everything on the surface. That is how we roll. Surface level conversations will keep everything calm, cool, and most importantly collected. No one needs anymore trauma or needs to visit old wounds that still have bandages. It was a visit that gets 3 stars.

Happy Day, ALL!





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Old 12-16-2022, 09:08 AM
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I LOVE this, Mizz.

I have ties to you, a wonderful writer who is going to blow the whole world up with your articulation, accountings, and emotional stirrings.

Thank you!
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Old 12-17-2022, 07:05 AM
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Free

I work in retina - I know medical advice is not allowed, but please drive to Denver and see the best retina specialist you can get into see.

I will see if I can find any Denver contacts and will PM them if I do.

If its your retina, time is really important.
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Old 12-17-2022, 12:31 PM
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Free- How is your eye? Dropsie is on to something here.
Let us know how its going when you a minute.

I've been trying to be like Plop. I ran in the freezing weather yesterday and today. Im getting back to the ol' daily routine of running and weights. I allowed myself some breathing room and didnt stress too much over the lack of daily exercise. Im back now. I feel so much better when I stick to the routine that has been engrained into my cells. Ive not lost any strength or stamina so that feels good.

We had a storm a week ago that took out our back yard area. The Climbing rose had to be cut down. The cemented posts tore in half due to the MILLION MILE AN HOUR winds. So, I spent time filling up the green waste bin and rolled it down to the curb. "Its a long ways to Wednesday" a neighbor says while slowly walking by. "You're right. Im just leaving this here though" and then I carry on MINDING MY OWN BUSINESS and whistling while I worked.

On a different note. I'm more than willing to let any one of you adopt my felines. They are ten years old and have quite the zest for life. My entire Thursday was spent raging against the machine, raging about how fed up I am over these cats and their territory issues, spending way too much money on cleaning supplies, and washing load after load of laundry while hand washing 6 dresses. My house is really really clean though. I mean, it was clean before but its now ULTRA clean. So, after I evicted these two felines from the house, I decided (16 hrs later) that I would give it "one last solution oriented try."

Seeing how its winter, It would be cruel to force these two assholes to sleep outside.

The "one last solution oriented try" plan:
1 new cat tree, 3 new boxes, 1 giant box of litter, 2 new beds, 2 pheromone diffusers, 2 new cat toys, 1 bag of calming treats, 2 bottles of enzymes, 2 plug in smell good things, one rearrangement of the bedroom, one bag of super expensive cat food......

Also, my spouse wrote to Jackson Galaxy. He is the cat whisperer. So, Jackson if you are reading this....HELP!


And....Now I go off and enjoy the rest of my day. Ill probably take a nap at some point.

HAVE AN AMAZING SATURDAY!
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Old 12-17-2022, 05:40 PM
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I think its important for me to clarify my "rage" when it came to these felines:

I didn't have violent uncontrollable fits of anger as the definition would state. I was just angry, overwhelmed, and vocal about being angry and overwhelmed. I had one last working nerve with this situation. That last neve broke. So, I think the better term is: Very angry over these felines and their destructive habits. Rightfully so. Its maddening.
Just wanted to give a bit more clarification as I don't want to give the impression that I turned into the Hulk!
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Old 12-17-2022, 07:48 PM
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Mizz, I had a gorgeous kitty that had a pee pee problem.

Took it to the vet, and there were no medical issues found. I did it all. Put the feeding dishes down where it urinated. It even urinated in the garage on plastic bags, not on laundry, or other more popular cat pee pee places that aren’t the litter box.

I cried and said I have to give it away to a farm to be a mouser, or I have to put it down.

The vet said she agreed, some cats can’t be retrained or get it from the git go so they earn a ‘gone’ ticket. I would have been very resentful and angry at the kitty if I’d kept her.

I LOVE kitties, but I love my space without cat elimination more than them.

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Old 12-17-2022, 10:43 PM
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Mizz, I feel you. We once had a queen (from the animal shelter) that started peeing on the hall carpet once she felt at home. We took her to the vet, no medical problems, she just wanted to mark her territory. We knew that she'd been thrown out by her previous owner after they'd found out she was pregnant (yes, a genius move not to sterilise your cat) and felt sorry for her and had already grown attached to her, so we just kept buying her cheapo carpets from flea markets. After a while we got used to the cleaning and buying new carpets. She was four years old when she came to live with us with her daughter and she died at the ripe old age of fifteen years and nine months. Yeah, I know. I just can't get angry with cats, no matter what they do, but I understand they can be a pain in the butt.
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Old 12-18-2022, 07:13 AM
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Thanks for the understanding, peeps.

The benefits of getting through territory marking:

I now have a room devoted to all my belongings. I feel like Im a Bravo housewife, minus the millions of dollars, and the overly expensive articles of clothing and shoes. Opens door to back room, "This is where the magic happens." The camera gets one shot to film the small room with a treadmill and dresses hanging to dry. Hats, jewelry, and scarves are placed about with some free weights on the floor. A small rubber duck sits in the corner on top of a pile of books. The room is smaller than a housewives bathroom, but its a safe space away from territory markings and claws. Its my space. No spraying allowed.

Im going to create a sign for the door and hang it at a level where the cats can read it. "BEWARE OF DOG"
The felines will surely get the message after they read the sign. Yep. This plan is the greatest plan ever!

*No animals were yelled at or harmed during this process.









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