JaseUK

Well despite my other post (about alcohol being expensive) I'm really struggling today.

I just really crave a drink and feel like crying.

My usual trigger of going to my parents (that I can't get out of this time) is part of it. Also I guess my other post is part of it as my AV is saying 'you've done well, you're out of the woods, treat yourself'.

Not sure what's going to happen tbh .

doggonecarl

Stay strong. Now is a good time to test out some coping skills. Not sure what it is about a visit to your parents that would prompt a spree of drinking. But if it's just a visit, then it will be over, you can leave, and the "trigger" is no more a reason to drink.

JaseUK

Basically my dad was abusive to my mum and his kids when I was growing up. He's a better person now but seeing him brings back memories. I 'have' to go though because I want to see my mum and sis (who has a learning disability). Also I take my mum shopping and to her hospital appointments etc. So yeah.

SoberLeigh

I understand, Jase, how your visit could be challenging. Keep reminding yourself that the visit is temporary and that you are seeing the people who are important to you - your Mom and sis - and that you are helping them. Keep the important ones and your sobriety front and center. You can absolutely make it through this and, as Dee says, you will be building sober muscles in the process.

Hevyn

Hi Jase. I agree with SoberLeigh's advice. You grow stronger when you face these things sober & clear headed. We know it's hard! The anxiety will ease up.

tomls

You can do this!

biminiblue

Hey, Jase.

I had to try to forgive some family members for a few really awful things...and it isn't easy. Sometimes it still bothers me, and they've been gone for decades. Most of the time I'm okay with just letting go of it. I'm sorry you went through an abusive situation. You're safe now. It's over.

I think a lot of us have scary or bad memories when it comes to our family members. I'm glad to hear your dad has tried to change, so maybe it's time to try to change yourself? You can't change what's already happened, but you can try to not dwell on it, and definitely don't drink at it!

Honor that little kid that was scared and protect him now.

Many socially-distanced hugs.

Dee74

I think you can do more than hope
Think about the kinds of pressures that make you drink and make plans against those feelings, to stay sober.

Read around here to remind yourself of how self destructive our drinking is. Don’t confuse abstinence for control,
No matter how much time has gone past since my last drink. I can never forget I’m an alcoholic.

Remember you ‘re there for your mum and sister…and I agree with Bim - if your dad is a better person now you can be too.

You can do this.

LadyBug66

Hi JaseUK, I hope you didn't drink today. You recognized what triggers your desire to drink now plan around it ways to keep from drinking.

Hevyn

How's it going today, Jase?

Free2bme888

((((((JASE))))))Hugs to you.


Good words…..don’t confuse abstinence with control.

JaseUK

Hey Guys
Thank you all for your kind words and encouragement.

I managed to resist the nagging words in my head and I'm back home now. So yeah. Feel I can relax a bit now.

Hope everyone is doing good and thanks again.

SoberLeigh

Well done, Jase. Flex those sober muscles!

Dee74

Glad you got through that Jase - don't relax too much tho - stay vigilant.
The most dangerous times for me were after I got through something hard.

D

dustyfox

Well done Jase - I hope you're feeling ok. People are here for you.