Self medicating
 

Okay I realize I'm primarily self medicating for anxiety,depression,and chronic pain. I need to find a way to deal with these things(in a healthy manner)in order to stay sober. I also need to remind my self using just makes me anxious once the anesthesia from alcohol and weed wear off. I get rebound anxiety. Using isn't helping and worse it makes doing nothing with my life feel like okay leading me be filled with regret when sober. This leads to use to take away feelings of regret. Then thier is chronic pain but using just makes hurt more when said substances wear off. I'm going to look into cbd as it's non-pyschoactive. The other thing is I need to make friends as the biggest trigger for me other than pain is loneliness and having nothing to do but watch TV or read. Deep down I believe I'm incapable of making and Mantaining friends.
david

I think you have to simply the process to get started. Don't drink today, don't drink tomorrow NO MATTER WHAT...repeat.
Its tough but thats really the bottom line of recovery.

As you're doing that you can look for professionals to help you with your anxiety, pain, and depression.

They may not all be the same doctor but its worth looking for and finding that help :)

D

Try this...
 

Hi David. I was self medicating lots of mental health problems and a life dominated with trauma, loss and sadness. Nor can I sustain relationships, I don't think I ever learned how to.

Sobriety can still be achieved, you have to take a great big leap of faith. For me it has not been a fix all wonder cure. I still hurt from the past and am scared of the future. I still have no friends and isolate for fear of pain or rejection from others.

But I am no longer a slave to a toxic substance. I don't wake gasping for my first drink, how to get it, when to drive with the least chance of being caught, keeping the curtains closed for fear of someone seeing me. Nothing peaks anxiety more than a blackout when you have no recollection what you did.

Life is far from perfect but it is definitely better than it was.

Start your healing today. :)

I think we all were self medicating something.
Personally my anxiety has all but gone away since quitting.

Start by leaving alcohol behind and go from there.
It won't be easy but it will be easier than the path you are on now.

I agree 100%, I was using alcohol to self-medicate for my anxiety and other issues, and while it did work for a while it made everything worse in the end. I can't speak to the chronic pain issue as I do not have experience, but I know for certain that the first step for treating the others is to quit drinking. Anxiety and Depression are very common and very treatable. You will likely find that in some instances, your drinking is indeed the partial cause rather than the solution, so the act of quitting will alleviate some of the symptoms. Alcohol is a very powerful CNS depressant, so if you are clinically depressed drinking is literally like pouring gasoline on a fire to put it out - exactly the opposite effect.

Another point worth making is that most of the methods you might use to help with your mental health issues ( therapy, medications, etc ) are not going to be effective while you are still drinking. Again, alcohol is a very powerful drug and it alters your brain chemistry in a very significant way so other interventions will be less effective or sometimes even counter-effective.

My "toolbox" for dealing with my anxiety included therapy, mindfulness and mediation, diet and exercise modification, reading and I even tried a couple of meds. I did not personally seek these tools until about a year after I quit drinking - I had hoped that quitting would solve all my problems. It certainly did help with some of them, but not all.

All brilliant advice David. As for friends. How can you make friends when you feel so rubbish about yourself ? You will be amazed once you start to feel a little good yourself you will start to connect with people more. You will allow the real you to be glimpsed by others and slowly you will start to want to be part of things, people will reach out to you. It is all part of the healing - Try and think about what you like to do, what makes you happy, because what ever it is there will be other people who enjoy the same things. Don't drink. Post here instead.

There's some wise words here for you my friend. Unfortunately we've all had to find out the hard way that alcohol is not an effective pain reliever.

Getting sober is not for the faint of heart. Sure it's not as bad as being in a Turkish prison or being stuck alone in a hot elevator for 48hrs with Kenny G music playing on a constant loop but it's still a hellish experience.
If there was an easy way for people to get sober without having to deal with the initial withdrawals and coping with the anxiety/depression/pain/cloudy feelings that can last for months on end then we would all taken that path.
There's steps you can take to help soften the impact of getting sober that you can find all over this site but at the end of the day it all comes down to grit and determination.