when you decide its the last time
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Feb 2020
Posts: 5
when you decide its the last time
Hi, just a bit of background, I am not new to these forums have been here a few times over the years.. anyway, I decided about 6 weeks ago to never drink alcohol ever again since i live with my parents i was going to get thrown out the house, made homeless for drinking and that scared me. I always didnt really care enough in the past and would just sneak beer or whatever. Not to mention i was drinking whilst medicated for severe mental illness. I allow myself nicotine and some caffeine but that's all. So i was wondering was there a moment that changed everything for you concerning your addiction?
Hi again steelchain
yeah for me it was the moment when I knew for sure my drinking would kill me if I didn't stop.
Not everyone drinks to that point tho, or gets that kind of surety, so as weird as it sounds I consider myself lucky.
If you have that surety that you're done with drinking for good, then that's awesome
D
yeah for me it was the moment when I knew for sure my drinking would kill me if I didn't stop.
Not everyone drinks to that point tho, or gets that kind of surety, so as weird as it sounds I consider myself lucky.
If you have that surety that you're done with drinking for good, then that's awesome
D
The choice to stop drinking on my own was taken
away because i had tried countless times before
and failed every time.
The night i decided to call it quits on life, family,
myself, drowning my sorrows, failures with pain
pills and alcohol, i didnt expect to wake up the next
morning.
I also didnt think about the consequences that would
follow my actions either. What about my 2 little ones
being left alone in the house or my husband without
a wife. Deceased.
That way is a permanent solution to a temporary problem
of addiction. However, I had to learn that there was a better
way to end the insanity that comes with addiction.
There is life after addiction. A rewarding life filled with many
of life's gifts.
When under the influence of a toxic poisonous substance
it can be fatal. And once gone, there is no coming back. That's
the reality of it. Sad but true.
Thank God, I did wake up. Not by the kids trying to wake
me, because they did, but with no avail. Then, a faint ringing
of the phone next to my bed allowed me to answer it with
my in law calling asking where we were.
With slurred speaking, the alarm went off for family and
a plan of intervention was hatched and hours later i was
escorted away to the officers car and driving to a court
ordered rehab hospital for evaluation.
From their i spent 28 days instay with a 6 week aftercare
program attached and AA meetings to follow.
That phone call, the ringing of the phone I answered,
was my HP calling to say, get up, because I'm not thru
with you yet.
When i returned home from rehab, my spouse gave
me an ultimatum telling me that if i ever drink in the
house again then i would be out.
How dare you tell me that.
So yes, anger and resentments fueled me to do whatever
i needed to do the remain sober no matter what. I wanted
to regain control of my own destiny with help and guidance
of my AA program of recovery and HP.
Today, some 30 yrs sober later, i did exit my marriage
but well after my kids were grown and with a good amount
of sobriety under my belt.
Im happily remarried today as I continue on my own recovery
journey in life listening, learning, absorbing and applying this
gift of AA, my faith, then passing it on to others.
away because i had tried countless times before
and failed every time.
The night i decided to call it quits on life, family,
myself, drowning my sorrows, failures with pain
pills and alcohol, i didnt expect to wake up the next
morning.
I also didnt think about the consequences that would
follow my actions either. What about my 2 little ones
being left alone in the house or my husband without
a wife. Deceased.
That way is a permanent solution to a temporary problem
of addiction. However, I had to learn that there was a better
way to end the insanity that comes with addiction.
There is life after addiction. A rewarding life filled with many
of life's gifts.
When under the influence of a toxic poisonous substance
it can be fatal. And once gone, there is no coming back. That's
the reality of it. Sad but true.
Thank God, I did wake up. Not by the kids trying to wake
me, because they did, but with no avail. Then, a faint ringing
of the phone next to my bed allowed me to answer it with
my in law calling asking where we were.
With slurred speaking, the alarm went off for family and
a plan of intervention was hatched and hours later i was
escorted away to the officers car and driving to a court
ordered rehab hospital for evaluation.
From their i spent 28 days instay with a 6 week aftercare
program attached and AA meetings to follow.
That phone call, the ringing of the phone I answered,
was my HP calling to say, get up, because I'm not thru
with you yet.
When i returned home from rehab, my spouse gave
me an ultimatum telling me that if i ever drink in the
house again then i would be out.
How dare you tell me that.
So yes, anger and resentments fueled me to do whatever
i needed to do the remain sober no matter what. I wanted
to regain control of my own destiny with help and guidance
of my AA program of recovery and HP.
Today, some 30 yrs sober later, i did exit my marriage
but well after my kids were grown and with a good amount
of sobriety under my belt.
Im happily remarried today as I continue on my own recovery
journey in life listening, learning, absorbing and applying this
gift of AA, my faith, then passing it on to others.
Member
Join Date: Oct 2019
Posts: 259
I had decided to quit a lot of times but it never stuck because as soon as I wasn't hanging over, I figured it was ok to go back to drinking again. What changed for me was deciding that I wanted a sober life, not a life of "not drinking". That meant i had to let go of alcohol and everything I associated with it, the night life, the bars all that
I had a series of moments, week after week, month after month, year after year...
What I learned is that there really is no "rock bottom" because I kept finding yet a lower low.
Two moments changed everything for me, in this order:
1. I gave up. I could not stop drinking on my own and I couldn't fathom continuing to live either drunk or sober.
2. I learned to accept and eventually enjoy that I am an ok person with human flaws; not the inherently "bad" person I always feared (knew) that I was.
What I learned is that there really is no "rock bottom" because I kept finding yet a lower low.
Two moments changed everything for me, in this order:
1. I gave up. I could not stop drinking on my own and I couldn't fathom continuing to live either drunk or sober.
2. I learned to accept and eventually enjoy that I am an ok person with human flaws; not the inherently "bad" person I always feared (knew) that I was.
Hi steelchain. My turning point came when I finally realized I'd never, ever have any control once it was in my system. All my determination to just have 'a couple' never worked. It had become dangerous - it was poisoning me - and one drink always led to drunkenness, loss of control, personality & behavior changes, alienating of friends & family, poor health - the list goes on. It was no longer ever fun, exciting, relaxing, or an escape. It was toxic, dangerous, and soul stealing.
Honestly I'm not entirely sure what finally did it. I had slowly over the course of two years been admitting to myself that I was an alcoholic and something had to be done. But being young, I convinced myself that "one more week/month/year wouldn't hurt" since my body could take it. Really stupid. I started having what I think was liver pain (dull ache in my right side) at the age of 24 and it really scared me (I'm 26 now). Still drank for awhile after though.
I'm not sure what finally clicked, but one day I just stopped. I think I was so tired and sick and I just couldn't take it anymore. So I stopped and I started taking it seriously; I made a plan, went to meetings, and did what I could to support my recovery. I knew I could never have the life I wanted or be successful if I didn't deal with my alcoholism. I have been thankfully alcohol free ever since.
I'm not sure what finally clicked, but one day I just stopped. I think I was so tired and sick and I just couldn't take it anymore. So I stopped and I started taking it seriously; I made a plan, went to meetings, and did what I could to support my recovery. I knew I could never have the life I wanted or be successful if I didn't deal with my alcoholism. I have been thankfully alcohol free ever since.
Oh, I dont know.......
I was laying in my bed with a hangover and I couldn't get out of bed for the millionth time. Anxiety set in, again. I cried, again. I feared, again. Seeing how I had been in that spot so many many many times I knew, again, that I was truly alcoholic and there was no way out of the hell but to surrender.
I was really getting sick and tired of being ******* sick and tired.
Its all a series of unfortunate days leading me to where I am now.
SOBER.
So THANKFUL AND GRATEFUL!
I was laying in my bed with a hangover and I couldn't get out of bed for the millionth time. Anxiety set in, again. I cried, again. I feared, again. Seeing how I had been in that spot so many many many times I knew, again, that I was truly alcoholic and there was no way out of the hell but to surrender.
I was really getting sick and tired of being ******* sick and tired.
Its all a series of unfortunate days leading me to where I am now.
SOBER.
So THANKFUL AND GRATEFUL!
Member
Join Date: Aug 2020
Posts: 16
I think mine was last night. It was my first Sunday off this year. I have been drinking every night after work for as long as I can remember. So last night I headed to my favorite bar and got black out drunk. I don't remember anything from last night I woke up in my kitchen floor this morning and called out from work because I was still drunk and didn't want to drive. My house key was bent I don't know why. I don't remember the Uber ride home. My knees and chest hurt like I fell down somewhere and I don't know where. There is nothing in my life that has been so terrifying than this most recent black out. I'm pretty sure I got kicked out of the bar but I really don't know. Now it's just time to try and remember the shame I felt this morning. This isn't the first time I've woke up in a weird place. I once woke up in a parking lot in college but I just chalked that up to being in college instead of what it was a warning sign. I really want to stay sober but I don't know if I can find the will power to do so.
I don't think my revelation was a specific moment, but rather, a culmination of all the horrible mornings waking up sick as hell and wishing I was dead.
The last time I drank, it was for two days and I woke up feeling worse than I'd ever felt. I felt a shift in my thinking and vowed that I would never drink again. That was almost 11 yrs ago.
The two best pieces of advice I was given on staying sober was: You must want to be sober more than you want to drink. And second, I was advised to start practicing gratitude every day. Best advice I ever got.
The last time I drank, it was for two days and I woke up feeling worse than I'd ever felt. I felt a shift in my thinking and vowed that I would never drink again. That was almost 11 yrs ago.
The two best pieces of advice I was given on staying sober was: You must want to be sober more than you want to drink. And second, I was advised to start practicing gratitude every day. Best advice I ever got.
almost died from booze. my style of drinking had turned suicidal after over 30 years. I will die if I pick up. My children, grandchild and myself don't deserve that. Finally I realized that and now live each day as it comes. Have a counselor and my children's complete support. If I can do this, anyone can.
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