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200 Days today…

Old 06-28-2020, 12:47 AM
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200 Days today…

On the 12th of December last year, I set myself a goal; if I could just pass my previous sober record of 63 days, I would have been happy. But it just sort of snowballed – thank God – and today I have 200 days of sobriety under my belt. One day just ran into the next and they piled up: First 1 week, then 30 days, 50 days, 10 weeks, then a 100 days, then 4 months, 20 weeks, 6 months… And now 200 days.

I have much less anxiety (even taking into account my personal situation – which many of you know), I’m more at peace with myself than I have been in years; calmer, but far from complacent. I know it just takes a minute and one drink to take me right back to the beginning of the zombie-like hell I was in just a few months ago. Just one drink, and strangely enough, that was what I was offered yesterday, for the first time since I kicked the booze. My stepbrother asked me when I visited his house (we live on the same stand; different houses), if I was still not drinking or if he could offer me one? This while he sipped from a Brandy and Coke. It was easy to say, “no thanks, tomorrow I’ll be sober for 200 days”; much, much easier than it would have been a few months ago.

Which brings me back (again) to a point I’ve made on SR many times before. IT GETS EASIER EVERY DAY. It really does. The AV gets easier to shrug off and you smile a lot more – even if sometimes it is only to yourself. You’re happier, healthier - I could go on and on - and after each and every day, drinking becomes/seems like less of an option.

A line from an old Jim Croce song comes to mind; “If I could save time in a bottle”... I so much wish I could have, these days; instead, “I drowned time in a bottle”, and a large part of my life with it. The silver lining, thankfully, is that in three or four years from now, people won’t stand next to my grave and say “He killed time in a bottle”.

Early days still, but each of them is a (sober) gift.
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Old 06-28-2020, 01:30 AM
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congrats on 200 days RB

D
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Old 06-28-2020, 01:41 AM
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Congratulations! Two hundred days is quite an accomplishment! Your story sounds a bit like mine -
At first I had one day sober,
then I had two.
A week went by, and then I didn't count the days anymore.
After awhile I realized I had 100 days, then 6 months went by.
Some time back it came to my attention I had 17 years.
I'm at over 22 years now. Keep it up, it did get easier, and good luck!

Lautca
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Old 06-28-2020, 04:25 AM
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Hey Rock!

I'm so pleased for you and thankful for your message. I'm at 150 days now (!) and am very much looking forward to the part where it gets easier every day at 200 days. I was going to say it's been the same for me - the getting easier part - but i'm not sure if that's true. I think what's true is that I get stronger every day and that's good enough for me right now.

In any event, you've really pulled of a miracle getting and staying sober in that environment. I hope you share my certitude that if you can make it there, you can make it anywhere.

xo
O
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Old 06-28-2020, 06:38 AM
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Congratulations on 200 days, Rock, that's an awesome achievement!
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Old 06-28-2020, 07:33 AM
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Originally Posted by Obladi View Post
Hey Rock!

I'm so pleased for you and thankful for your message. I'm at 150 days now (!) and am very much looking forward to the part where it gets easier every day at 200 days. I was going to say it's been the same for me - the getting easier part - but i'm not sure if that's true. I think what's true is that I get stronger every day and that's good enough for me right now.

In any event, you've really pulled of a miracle getting and staying sober in that environment. I hope you share my certitude that if you can make it there, you can make it anywhere.

xo
O
Hi, O. Stronger is good, I agree. Impervious and/or more resistant, I like as well. All qualities, I think, that gets stronger with each new sober day I wake up to. One thing, I know, that does help and assist in my fight for sobriety, is knowing that I’m not going it alone; that there are thousands just like me and a lot of them are on SR. Sharing, caring and rooting for one another. It makes it so much easier, does it not?

150 Days is great, O, with 200 just around the corner. Time really flies when one doesn’t meander through each day on an alcoholic haze; to me it does, at least.

It’s just after four in the afternoon South African time and everything is back to normal here. The old man is in bed after having a screaming, swearing, hate-filled fit around two; stepmom had a drunk-crying episode at around the same time and has been stumbling around the kitchen ever since, mumbling and gulping from a beer-glass of frequent topped-up brandy and coke. They start around noon on weekends. But oh well: That's “Par for the course” here…

Hope you’ll have a great week, O.
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Old 06-28-2020, 07:36 AM
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Originally Posted by Tatsy View Post
Congratulations on 200 days, Rock, that's an awesome achievement!
Thanks, Tatsy.
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Old 06-28-2020, 10:05 AM
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Nice job!! keep up the great work!!

i love reading posts like this!! Wishing you the best!!

have a great week, thanks for sharing!
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Old 06-28-2020, 10:08 AM
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Originally Posted by Dave42001 View Post
Nice job!! keep up the great work!!

i love reading posts like this!! Wishing you the best!!

have a great week, thanks for sharing!
Have a nice week yourself, Dave.
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Old 06-28-2020, 10:29 AM
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Congratulations on your two hundred days-double triple digits, as it were. You really are building a great recovery in an incredibly hostile housescape RB. Looking forward to reading your books 📚 soon.

You are a real success story. Ever thought of blogging or writing autobiographical material? Lots of people know so little about SA and life there. I’m glad you are sharing through fiction, but I bet your own story is pretty interesting as well. . . Just a thought 💭
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Old 06-28-2020, 10:45 AM
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Congrats on your 200 day milestone! You’re right about the threat of relapse with just one drink. It’s surprisingly easy how you can just slip back into the lifestyle you had thought you’d left behind. The good thing, I’m hoping anyway, is the longer we’re sober the more that becomes your new lifestyle. Your new normal. Just takes time!
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Old 06-28-2020, 11:53 AM
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What a strong testimonial- to you, your determination and the benefits of sobriety! You don't even sound like the same person from just a few months ago. Keep on! Do you notice any difference in your writing?

(I continue to feel sad about the others in the home who are so very drunk and ill.)
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Old 06-28-2020, 01:57 PM
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Congrats RB ! YOu are going strong, keep going. I second Hawkeye's suggestion !
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Old 06-28-2020, 07:26 PM
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very cool, RB!
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Old 06-28-2020, 10:51 PM
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Nice work! 200 days is a remarkable personal achievement. Continue on!
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Old 06-28-2020, 11:24 PM
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Great to hear -- made my day!
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Old 06-29-2020, 04:13 AM
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Thanks, everyone. I hope you’re all well. Just a few replies:

Hi, Hawk, (and Kaneda). The writing is going well, and so far I still plan to publish at the end of July. I’ll make sure to post a link to the book when it’s available – if Dee and Anna will allow me to, of course. The autobiography? Sure I plan one, Hawk, but in a few years from now, when I’m in a position financially to sit down and write something nobody might want to read. Autobiographies really don’t sell unless you’re famous, like Branson or Jobs, or Obama(s) or Clinton(s).

JK… I was drunk for years, friend, and writing and drinking do not go well together, no matter what Hemingway used to say - “Write when you’re drunk, edit when you’re sober”. I wrote a lot, sure; but most of it was just no good. Brain-fog is a ruinous ingredient when it comes to penning ones imagination… as is despondency and hopelessness. These days, I believe my writing is much, much better, and like the rest of me - mental and physical – it gets better and easier each day.

As for my dad and stepmom, JK, I’ve learned not to interfere by now; It makes my own situation just more unbearable. So I leave them to their own horrible, sad, drunken lifestyle. Out of sight, out of mind…

Thanks again, everyone for your replies.
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Old 06-29-2020, 11:41 AM
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RB, thanks for the reminder. While I am only on day 11 I have had some longer quits and I would totally agree with what you put. It does get easier.
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Old 06-29-2020, 11:55 AM
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Originally Posted by MaximusD View Post
RB, thanks for the reminder. While I am only on day 11 I have had some longer quits and I would totally agree with what you put. It does get easier.
Best wishes, Maximus. You have almost two weeks in the bag
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Old 06-29-2020, 06:57 PM
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Congratulations!
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