Tetrax

Or are these forums surprisingly quiet, especially considering there's no physical meetings to go to?

I'm getting into the swing of things now I'm getting used to the new normal but then again I have been sober for 11 months, so it's not that hard. But I dunno what the hell I'd do if it was a year ago.

How's everyone finding their sobriety?

Dee74

Hi tetrax - no, you're right - new members have slowed to a trickle. Maybe it's reaction to the new normal courtesy of the virus ....

maybe they think like Lloyd Bridges in Airplane they picked the wrong week to stop ....

A lot of the pre virus members are hanging around tho - more than usual retention rates to my eyes.

Maybe everything will change again as the months go on - but we'll be here to help anyone who walks through our virtual door

August252015

I just popped back in now after a bit- that Coronavirus thread was too much and I have had a lot of other stuff to do regarding support and sobriety.

Hope all are taking care- it keeps getting worse here in GA....grateful my primary dr and my psych have been available this wk to do IRL and face time respectively, so my probs can be addressed.

We are on shelter in place in the whole state of GA, til at least Apr 13. All schools are out for the year. A city in south GA (Albany) now rivals other locations for highest infection rates. It's tough for everyone.

But it's all OK. It's just life happening.

Gettingcloser

"maybe they think like Lloyd Bridges in Airplane they picked the wrong week to stop ...."

Love this!!

Dee74

Stay safe and well August

D

FlyAgain

BeckoningCat

I am using this web site, the Annie Grace Alcohol Experiment (I love the prompts for the journals and some of the videos), I have dabbled with SMART tools. I can also see my normal therapist for general issues via a video meeting on-line.

I actually am super grateful for this time and am trying to look at it as a staycation retreat (though it would be much more fun to be a rich person at some yoga-meditation nature rehab or something, this works) so I can stick with my self-care routines which are supporting my recovery. Meditating, nature walks, sobriety websites, resting, doing quiet things I enjoy.

Don't get me wrong, I really wanted to drink a couple of days when I was super stressed about my roommates not social distancing or sheltering in place correctly. But just because that's what I always use as my excuse to escape. It's nothing new for me to find an excuse like that, it's not specific to COVID-19.

I find I am reacting the polar opposite of other people. I am grateful for this time of retreat (especially since I am not one of the severely ill people nor am I a healthcare worker) and I have this thing where I do not want to die drunk. I don't care a lot for organized religion but I have always been what you might call "spiritual." I think dying from addiction or while intoxicated, by murder or by suicide are the worst ways to die for your soul. I don't know if by that I mean you go to limbo/purgatory instead of heaven, or that you're instantly reincarnated as a street person in a developing country, or you just haunt people's houses, but I believe it's bad. I fear it. One of the thoughts that made me want to start getting sober (among many) was "do I want to live or die, and if I want to live why am I living like this." Also what I call "the darkness" which could be expressed psychologically as a form of fear and depression that expresses itself as evil or something hovering, like with malicious intent, that I started picking up on in more recent times drinking heavily. I actually sometimes watch horrible videos of drunk driving accidents, or videos about people who overdosed but lived on respirators in a coma or brain damaged to remind myself what horrific violence substance abuse can wreak. The horror. The horror of drunk drivers murdering other innocent people, the horror of an addict being left to die by their "friends" and barely hanging on to life in a hospital because it for whatever reason didn't quite kill them (though they weren't saved in time to have their stomach pumped, either).

I can't think of anything worse than dying drunk or wasting my last weeks or months alive on a drinking spree. I'm a weirdo.

2ndhandrose

Hear, hear, I agree completely!

Steely

I don't want to die drunk either BC. I want to be remembered as someone who gave up alcohol and decided to live.

August252015

Thank God I never started sniffing glue.

sobersophie

Thinking back to when I first quit drinking, I don't think I would have been strong enough to stay sober through something like this. My main struggle initially was dealing with all the extra time I seemed to have in the evening, which would only be magnified now.

I am grateful every day that I feel settled and content in sobriety. Now I am happy to enjoy free time, or a lazy evening with nothing to do. I am working on a 1000 piece jigsaw which, trust me, drunk me would have had no patience for!

I am troubled by all the posts on social media about how much or how early in the day people are drinking. I completely understand the need to blot it all out or just make the day end, but I imagine that many people will struggle to take control again when life returns to something resembling normality.

sugarbear1

Most likely they are stuck in zoom land with the virtual marathon meetings

Bilbao

I decided back in November that I had to stop drinking before I did myself any lasting harm, and generally haven't found it too difficult, but to be quite honest if I'd had to make that same decision in the last couple of weeks with the whole "suspension of normal" going on now I know that I wouldn't have been able to quit. It would have been "let's get to the other side of this and see what happens later."

Stayingsassy

Only an alcoholic could resonate with a comment like this.

Would be a.....massive, long bender.....if I were still a drinking lady.

ICETHEKING

The reality is a little more complex. SR was absolutely fabulous as an institution that supports the quitting of alcohol. However, anyone that has a slightly off center point of view is often quieted by the resident boo birds. If the people persist in pointing out an alternate point of view sometimes they are forced to leave the forum. This gets old after a spell and people visit other forums and find other forms of support.

These directly leads to less overall comments which you correctly noticed. I was active years ago and came back to see if things have changed for the better. Unfortunately, as you noticed they have not.
Any system that relies on moderators needs to freshen up occasionally, as sometimes a more energetic and open minded moderator will lead to more comments.

The alternative over a period of time will actually lead to less people being helped. When you front page has opening comments from a week or more it is time to try something new.

Dee74

I work with a terrific team ICETHEKING - many of whom are offline at the moment taking care of health and families.

We have some great members here too from all kinds of recovery methods

Every ones doing the best they can, man.

D

Anna

IceTheKing, I wonder if you have any idea at all how upsetting it is for Dee and me and other members who work hard to support our members to read that comment?? I wonder if you have any idea how much work our Mods, Admins and members put into helping people here and make sure the boards run smoothly.

Why are you here? What do you want?

August252015

As someone w a 'direct' tone at times, and knows that my tone can't always be 'heard' right on an online forum, trusting that y'all who get to know me are used to my pretty consistent worldview and recovery style

Dee Anna Scott and I'm sure lots of others who *volunteer* to mod and support are people I respect, don't always agree with, have been 'guided' by at times I might pop off....and I've learned that sometimes I"m best off using the ignore function at least temporarily.

I've had an ebb and flow to my participation level, but can always find at least one thread or person who resonates with me in a good way.

Anna

I think the answer to 'Is It Me?' is 'What are you doing to make SR better?' This forum is a reflection of ALL of us who use it. We are all able to make SR the best it can be...or not. If complaining about SR is the best you can do, then I feel sorry for you.

As you can tell, this thread has upset me a lot.

boreas

I lurked here for years before joining, and finally quit a few months after I signed up. This place is my sole means of support, and as such I value it greatly. My thanks to the mods who make it possible.

I’m glad to have a couple + years under my belt, as I can only imagine what a mess drunk bora could make of this. I have gratefully found the current state of things has put what is important into crystal clear focus, and a drink doesn’t make the list. Not even close.

-bora