Tonight, when I go to bed the old me dies....
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Join Date: Nov 2019
Posts: 84
Tonight, when I go to bed the old me dies....
When morning comes, the sun rises and I finally wake up... the new me is born. For now, I give myself beer.. but I do so knowing that when I go to sleep, my old self dies.
I'll be turning to this forum a lot for support in the coming days.
I'll be turning to this forum a lot for support in the coming days.
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Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,439
For now, I give myself beer..
I would love to tell you I woke up a new man DO, but I didn't.
I was the same old man for a while...but one who rejected drinking alcohol no matter how I felt...and one who made sure he reached out for support when he needed it
It was hard but it got easier.
slowly the seed sprouted from the salted ground and a new me grew.
D
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Join Date: Nov 2019
Posts: 84
Originally Posted by Dee74 
Are you drinking today after last night?
I would love to tell you I woke up a new man DO, but I didn't.
I was the same old man for a while...but one who rejected drinking alcohol no matter how I felt...and one who made sure he reached out for support when he needed it
It was hard but it got easier.
slowly the seed sprouted from the salted ground and a new me grew.
D
I would love to tell you I woke up a new man DO, but I didn't.
I was the same old man for a while...but one who rejected drinking alcohol no matter how I felt...and one who made sure he reached out for support when he needed it
It was hard but it got easier.
slowly the seed sprouted from the salted ground and a new me grew.
D
19 awesome ways my life changed in 19 sober months - Hip Sobriety blog
Last edited by Dee74; 01-05-2020 at 12:38 PM. Reason: can't link to blogs rule one
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Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,439
I'm not surprised or disappointed DO - continue to drink is what we alcoholics do.
But if you really want to be that new man - dump the rest of the booze. Make a definitive statement.
I called tomorrow a bunch of times and a bunch of times tomorrow never came.
Show yourself you're ready to be the new man.
Change needs more than declarations - it needs action too.
Dump the rest.
D
But if you really want to be that new man - dump the rest of the booze. Make a definitive statement.
I called tomorrow a bunch of times and a bunch of times tomorrow never came.
Show yourself you're ready to be the new man.
Change needs more than declarations - it needs action too.
Dump the rest.
D
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Nov 2019
Posts: 84
Originally Posted by Dee74
I'm not surprised or disappointed DO - continue to drink is what we alcoholics do.
But if you really want to be that new man - dump the rest of the booze. Make a definitive statement.
I called tomorrow a bunch of times and a bunch of times tomorrow never came.
Show yourself you're ready to be the new man.
Change needs more than declarations - it needs action too.
Dump the rest.
D
But if you really want to be that new man - dump the rest of the booze. Make a definitive statement.
I called tomorrow a bunch of times and a bunch of times tomorrow never came.
Show yourself you're ready to be the new man.
Change needs more than declarations - it needs action too.
Dump the rest.
D
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Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,439
I nearly died. Fell several times in one day, head wounds, mini strokes.
Thats one way to do it but I don't recommend it.
I was lucky to survive
It did help me reorder my priorities tho - every day is a gift.
I stopped wasting them.
You seem like a thinker. Think about the footprints you'll leave, DO.
D
Thats one way to do it but I don't recommend it.
I was lucky to survive
It did help me reorder my priorities tho - every day is a gift.
I stopped wasting them.
You seem like a thinker. Think about the footprints you'll leave, DO.
D
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Join Date: Nov 2019
Posts: 84
Originally Posted by Dee74
I nearly died. Fell several times in one day, head wounds, mini strokes.
Thats one way to do it but I don't recommend it.
I was lucky to survive
It did help me reorder my priorities tho - every day is a gift.
I stopped wasting them.
You seem like a thinker. Think about the footprints you'll leave, DO.
D
Thats one way to do it but I don't recommend it.
I was lucky to survive
It did help me reorder my priorities tho - every day is a gift.
I stopped wasting them.
You seem like a thinker. Think about the footprints you'll leave, DO.
D
I am a thinker, problem solver, I work in IT for a school district and have worked in IT for 18 years... I just fail at myself.
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Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
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Thanks. I'm a survivor.
I think you are too.
You know its never too late to write some new code, learn a new programming language, or format a new disk.
Thats about the extent of my computing methaphors lol - but...seriously - if you want change, you'll make change no matter how difficult it seems at the outset..
Don't let fear and inertia hold you back from your future
D
I think you are too.
You know its never too late to write some new code, learn a new programming language, or format a new disk.
Thats about the extent of my computing methaphors lol - but...seriously - if you want change, you'll make change no matter how difficult it seems at the outset..
Don't let fear and inertia hold you back from your future
D
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Join Date: Nov 2019
Posts: 84
Originally Posted by Dee74
Thanks. I'm a survivor.
I think you are too.
You know its never too late to write some new code, learn a new programming language, or format a new disk.
Thats about the extent of my computing methaphors lol - but...seriously - if you want change, you'll make change no matter how difficult it seems at the outset..
Don't let fear and inertia hold you back from your future
D
I think you are too.
You know its never too late to write some new code, learn a new programming language, or format a new disk.
Thats about the extent of my computing methaphors lol - but...seriously - if you want change, you'll make change no matter how difficult it seems at the outset..
Don't let fear and inertia hold you back from your future
D
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Join Date: Nov 2019
Posts: 84
Originally Posted by Derringer
If you are a good thinker, then transfer it to planning how you are going to get and stay sober.
Good plans usually include a lot of action.
If nothing changes, nothing changes.
Good plans usually include a lot of action.
If nothing changes, nothing changes.
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Join Date: Dec 2019
Location: Wisconsin
Posts: 308
Devious, sorry to hear about your mother. I’ve never been there so I can’t relate and can only imagine.
If you are still up, pour the rest of that beer down the drain. Physically at this point it won’t matter but mentally it will be a good start to your sobriety.
I mentally quit alcohol 8 months ago. What I mean is that I wanted nothing to do with booze anymore but physically I had to have it to just get out of bed.
Respectfully, you just went to the ER with what you thought were alcohol related symptoms but you still picked up today. I have been there. Last year in fact. Went to the ER with what I though were alcohol related symptoms. Nope they said I was healthy. Cool, I can keep drinking!
It sounds like you might be physically dependent and that isn’t something to play around with. Whatever path you choose to sobriety, this forum will be here for you! Good luck my friend.
If you are still up, pour the rest of that beer down the drain. Physically at this point it won’t matter but mentally it will be a good start to your sobriety.
I mentally quit alcohol 8 months ago. What I mean is that I wanted nothing to do with booze anymore but physically I had to have it to just get out of bed.
Respectfully, you just went to the ER with what you thought were alcohol related symptoms but you still picked up today. I have been there. Last year in fact. Went to the ER with what I though were alcohol related symptoms. Nope they said I was healthy. Cool, I can keep drinking!
It sounds like you might be physically dependent and that isn’t something to play around with. Whatever path you choose to sobriety, this forum will be here for you! Good luck my friend.
sober style
Join Date: May 2016
Location: San Antonio
Posts: 2,384
I do feel like the drunk that I was is now dead, but it was my hard-won sobriety over months and now years that finished him off. Learning how to face the world and myself as I really was, not just realizing the stark truth about alcohol and me but internalizing that idea in my bones. It was that time-consuming painstaking process that created a new person, one that was free.
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Hey DO - totally echoing Dee here. I too was a near death case. My husband, not even close in the same way, but equally an alcoholic who had to stop.
This disease is devious just like your user name. Being a thinker can kill us. We can't think our way out or around that action part, and the quitting part. Then we can figure out *enough* of the why to get it and know why we have to change.
My old me didn't exactly die - I just learned to use her precious self to make me who I am now.
This disease is devious just like your user name. Being a thinker can kill us. We can't think our way out or around that action part, and the quitting part. Then we can figure out *enough* of the why to get it and know why we have to change.
My old me didn't exactly die - I just learned to use her precious self to make me who I am now.
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Join Date: May 2012
Location: canada
Posts: 7,242
there was no "new me" when i woke up in the morning after my last drink.
there was, though, a new attitude and determination and conviction to do whatever needed doing to walk a different path.
nothing wrong with crying . perfectly appropriate when experiencing loss and love.
looking forward to seeing tomorrow's posts.
there was, though, a new attitude and determination and conviction to do whatever needed doing to walk a different path.
nothing wrong with crying . perfectly appropriate when experiencing loss and love.
looking forward to seeing tomorrow's posts.
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Join Date: Sep 2015
Posts: 3,163
I love hip sobtriety and found a lot of wisdom there. Did her course a while after I stopped and really liked it.
For me the decision was the key, I do not drink and will never quit that decision.
As I had already decided, there was no need to decide whether to drink in the future because that decision was taken. Want a drink, sure, have a drink, nope cause I dont drink and I will never quit that decision. Over time, dont really want to drink but were I to, nope because I dont drink....rinse repeat.
And the acceptance that even one sip was enough to go back down that dark road.
The decision and that acceptance and this place was enough for me, and some hip sobriety thrown in later.
All of us can do this, be one of us who do. I feel you got this, but you need to really want it, even more than you want to drink.
X
For me the decision was the key, I do not drink and will never quit that decision.
As I had already decided, there was no need to decide whether to drink in the future because that decision was taken. Want a drink, sure, have a drink, nope cause I dont drink and I will never quit that decision. Over time, dont really want to drink but were I to, nope because I dont drink....rinse repeat.
And the acceptance that even one sip was enough to go back down that dark road.
The decision and that acceptance and this place was enough for me, and some hip sobriety thrown in later.
All of us can do this, be one of us who do. I feel you got this, but you need to really want it, even more than you want to drink.
X
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Join Date: Nov 2017
Location: UK
Posts: 634
I've just rejoined the forum. How are you doing DO? I told myself so many times that I would give up the next day, I lost count how many! I tried tapering lots of times too, the last time I tried that I just thought, "that's it, enough is enough!" I wasn't controlling the alcohol, it was controlling me, I had to let that go. My last drink was 25th Sept 2017.
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