lca

As a newcomer to the site and a person who is just starting to understand how serious her problem is, I have a quick question. I am going to sound like a total amateur I am sure, but I was just wondering if there is anyone that feels the same way I do. The thing is, I feel like my problem with alcohol is some terrible "habit". I just come home from work and pour a glass of wine. I dont think about it before then, I am fine during the day, but once I get home and have the first glass I just keep drinking. I dont really ever get out of control, but I can drink 2 or 3 bottles of wine each night. I know that I have a drinking problem, I drink way too much everyday, but I dont know where it comes from. I have never felt like I was having a bad day and needed a drink, nor have I felt like I needed to drink to feel comfortable in a social situation... I have always been outgoing and comfortable in most situations. I have great relationships with my family and friends and have always been very sucessful. Its like i just have this bad habit of drinking when I get home. Drinking has just always been a part of my life. Since I was very young, we would always have wine with dinner, and then my parents would have a few more glasses after that. No one got drunk or out of hand... it seemed so normal. When I got older and moved out, I just continued doing what I always did. I thought it was so normal (even healthy) to drink wine in the evening. It seems so socially acceptable. I guess I am just wondering if there is anyone out there that has been in my shoes. Anyone that has felt that it was just a really bad "habit" that they needed to break? If so, did you find that when you tried to stop that it wasnt the case? I know alcoholism is a disease and I know I have it. I just dont know why or where it came from... I hope I dont sound too naive, this is just new to me, I have never dealt with it before and I definitely know very little about it. I am just trying to sort through it and figure out why I am like this...

Time2Surrender

Hello Ica and welcome.My name is Michael.I am a recovering alcoholic/addict.I recommend you try AA meetings.Works for millions of people everyday.

NoMoBeer

...except my "habit" was beer. It was never an "obsession," unless I tried to go without it for any length of time. And even then, it never seemed like an obsession, but alcohol is "cunning, baffling and powerful." I just rationalized that I enjoy my drinking, I've gone a couple of days and now deserve it. That's an obsession, just disguised.

You say in your post that it's "just a bad habit," yet you also admitted that you are an alcoholic. For me, it was a lot easier to admit that it was just a habit, but I also knew deep down that I was an alcoholic.

SO, once I admit that (and I didn't truly for a long time), I must accept the fact that I cannot drink alcohol safely. I also know that I need to find a program of recovery, b/c I could not do it alone. AA is working for me, but it's a one day at a time deal. I know I'll never graduate, and have to work daily to maintain sobriety... Maybe you can give it a shot -- I'm sure there are many meetings in the Boston area, try a few and find one you feel comfortable with. Keep an open mind, and post here or in the AA forum with any questions.

It's a great day to be sober!!!!

Ken

Anna

Hi Ica,

Welcome to SR.

I'm Anna, alcoholic and I do not believe that alcoholism is a habit. It is a disease and it's far more complex than a 'bad habit'. If you think it's a habit, then you could use your will power to stop it. Can you do that? Believe me, I and many others here, tried that countless times and it doesn't work.

I don't know why I have this disease either. I know it has something to do genetics and brain chemicals. It has to do with not dealing with emotions in a healthy way. It's not a simple answer.

I hope you hang around here and become inspired.

Love, Anna