RecklessEric

So, I went on a four day bender last week.
The details are not what I want to talk about here.
I want to describe the horror of the last few days of withdrawal.

I'm on day three, and am finally able to function, albeit with difficulty.
The first two days, everything sent a shiver of anxiety through me. Somebody speaking, a car outside, a piece of music on the radio. They all made me shudder. I could not sit still for five minutes.
Today, started similarly. I decided not to take the Librium I had been prescribed as the only thing they did was make me dizzy (dizzier)?
But as today progressed, I was able to come out of myself a little and engage with people. Really hard to do but I managed it.
Tonight, I feel much better.

Imagine not being able to have a radio on, because every word or song jolts your entire body. Imagine not being able to sit but not able to stand. Imagine wondering why on earth you are humming a Sugarcubes' song endlessly.

I have had hard withdrawals before but hell, I don't have another one of these in me.
Seriously friends, if anyone reading this is toying with "having just one or two", YOU WILL REGRET IT.

Dee74

I'm sorry you relapsed but I'm glad you made it back WE.

& you know...if you did ever want to 'go over those details' so we can help you make this the last time you drink, we're all ears

doggonecarl

I hope you can leverage your own advice next time you think about drinking.

Sober369

I'm sorry you've had to go through that. It sounds horrible! But, now that you're out the other side, it can be a great tool for you staying sober! Had you been sober prior to the four day bender?

harriet11

I've also just been on a bender and was very dizzy, I'm on day two and still feel rough but at least the wretching has stopped and I've eaten something this evening. I need to remember this too.

RecklessEric

Family stress. I saw the signs, thought I was on top of it.
But the point I wanted to make in the thread, is that of course the stress is now 100 times worse.

RecklessEric

Oh yes. Sober and flying. But I let my guard down when I got stressed.
Rookie mistake.

BullDog777

I'm glad you're back. I hope this is the last time you ever feel like this.

Briansy

Eric. I'm very sorry to hear this. I had you down as one of the ones with rock solid sobriety. How long were you sober for prior to the bender? Your symptoms sound horrific. I find that those benzos actually keep that lingering anxiety going sometimes. Just leave me with a nasty rebound anxiety feeling.

SnoozyQ

Thanks for your post Eric. These are always helpful.

It keeps me on track, i NEVER want to have a hangover like the one i did nearly a Year ago. It was horrendous, scary and i ended up in hospital by ambulance.

Even though i have much sadness going on in my life right now, its posts like yours that help.

Drinking solves nothing , it exacerbates everything .

Im so glad you are feeling better xxx

Fusion

I hope you feel better soon, RecklessEric. Maybe print your post out and keep it in your wallet as a reminder?

Stayingsassy

Not drinking can be tough when the stress builds.

What other things can you do to relieve stress the next time that doesn’t involve drinking?

What are some of the ways that you cope with stress? I’ll bet you have more than just drinking you can turn to.

I don’t think it’s possible to sit with enormous stress and not have something you can do for relief.

I find sitting in nature, doing a super tough workout, writing out everything with pen and paper, close time with the husband, talking to someone in person, or spending time with animals, or even just disappearing in work, movies, or books to be helpful.

What do you do, besides drinking, that relieves your stress?

RecklessEric

My daughter is now a teenager. She's having a problem and it struck me for the first time that I can't just fix it. So instead of letting the proper course of action take it's time, I acted like an addict and just blotted it out. Instead of working it through rationally, which is what I can normally do.

Stayingsassy

It’s also very, very tough to be a teenager. Whatever she’s going through, the best thing you can possibly do for her is just love her. And if she won’t let you in, keep trying.

Offer to take her out to eat one on one, come in her room to talk, do some extra nurturing like buying her new shoes or a sweatshirt, ask her if she wants to watch a movie with you, just spend time. Think about what really makes her happy and find a way to make it happen for her, hopefully an activity you can do together.

Remember that whatever it is, there is usually a solution, and if there is not: there’s nothing love can’t soothe.

Maybe one day she’ll look back and say “wow, my dad was really there for me when I went through that.”

I lost my dad in January and I remember all the times he spent with me.

Just drop the booze again and refocus. It’ll be ok.

RecklessEric

Thanks for the support, folks.

Things are looking much better.

August252015

So sorry for this whole deal, Eric. Glad you are here.

The best thing for your daughter is a sober parent. Everything else from love on come thru when a parent does that, from what I went thru with my mom.

Did you check with your dr re stopping the Librium? I have never taken it but I know there is some med I shouldn't stop without help or a prescribed taper of some kind.

You can do this.

Briansy

Pleased to hear it, Eric.