Petrified Of A Seizure
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2019
Posts: 54
Originally Posted by BullDog777 
You mentioned that you sometimes went into withdrawal even after 4 beers or so? I was the same way. The way my doctor explained it to me was I was in a constant state of withdrawal and didn't know it. There is no more "normal".
It was further explained to me that there was basically only drunk, slightly drunk and drinking. At this point, your body is toxic and being totally sober, is out the window.
You'd have to medically detox for a good while to go back to being not toxic. Even then, if i were to go back, then the "kindling" would come into play. Forget what ever sober time I had, the withdrawal picks up very close to where you left off. It changes us on a cellular level.
I was on the "taper" train too. I tried my hardest for 4 years to taper. I never made it. I could get close, but inevitably I would always go back.
I have a history of seizures and when my neighbor finally picked me up and took me to the ER, my blood pressure was at a stroke level. My organs were heavily damaged. I was in BAD shape. I had damaged my heart, my pancreas, my liver and my kidneys. I also gave myself diabetes. I was in the hospital for weeks and I was terrified, but It was the only way for me to really get sober.
I'm no doctor, but my blood pressure was the same way. It was extremely high, and stayed that way because of me being in that constant state of withdrawal. After they detoxed me, I was put on BP meds and now it's been normal for 3 years.
I'm glad I gave up tapering. I just couldn't do it anymore and I'm the strongest person I know. It whooped my a$$.
I also suffered from extreme anxiety and I had gained a ton of weight. I'm a big guy anyway. I stand 6'5 and when I was in shape I walked around at around 225-230. I think I was about 320 when I got to the ER. Since then I've lost almost 80 pounds in the 3 years I've been sober. I'm about 10 pounds from my goal.
How much was I drinking at the end? Most days it was about 2 liters of VAT69 and 12-15 beers. I had been doing that for years.
If I can get sober, so can you, but you might need a hospital to do it the way your body needs it to be done. I wish you the best of luck. Hang in there.
It was further explained to me that there was basically only drunk, slightly drunk and drinking. At this point, your body is toxic and being totally sober, is out the window.
You'd have to medically detox for a good while to go back to being not toxic. Even then, if i were to go back, then the "kindling" would come into play. Forget what ever sober time I had, the withdrawal picks up very close to where you left off. It changes us on a cellular level.
I was on the "taper" train too. I tried my hardest for 4 years to taper. I never made it. I could get close, but inevitably I would always go back.
I have a history of seizures and when my neighbor finally picked me up and took me to the ER, my blood pressure was at a stroke level. My organs were heavily damaged. I was in BAD shape. I had damaged my heart, my pancreas, my liver and my kidneys. I also gave myself diabetes. I was in the hospital for weeks and I was terrified, but It was the only way for me to really get sober.
I'm no doctor, but my blood pressure was the same way. It was extremely high, and stayed that way because of me being in that constant state of withdrawal. After they detoxed me, I was put on BP meds and now it's been normal for 3 years.
I'm glad I gave up tapering. I just couldn't do it anymore and I'm the strongest person I know. It whooped my a$$.
I also suffered from extreme anxiety and I had gained a ton of weight. I'm a big guy anyway. I stand 6'5 and when I was in shape I walked around at around 225-230. I think I was about 320 when I got to the ER. Since then I've lost almost 80 pounds in the 3 years I've been sober. I'm about 10 pounds from my goal.
How much was I drinking at the end? Most days it was about 2 liters of VAT69 and 12-15 beers. I had been doing that for years.
If I can get sober, so can you, but you might need a hospital to do it the way your body needs it to be done. I wish you the best of luck. Hang in there.
I am going to get off the Brandy I have been drinking for weeks now and go back on Beer and slowly reduce the amount I have.
The thing that scares me is I have massive spikes of high blood pressure even on just 4 cans of beer a day so I worry it is not Alcohol doing it, but as soon as I get to the hospital and know I am in a safe place my pressure goes down. Unfortunately there is nothing to stop my anxiety unless I go and get myself checked at the hospital, then I walk out feeling on top of the world.
Today has got to be the worst I have ever felt in forever, and I was drinking Brandy last night. My whole
body feels completely smashed, shaking inside (you can't see me shaking on the outside). I'm drinking loads of water, eating well but I cannot get rid of this shaking inside me. But again it happens on 4 cans of beer.
Seriously what you have told me, has helped me so much and given me the biggest kick to make a change, you have not scared me you have simply advised me and this is the advise I have been looking for.
Thank You and F this hangover if it is a hangover, I am so close to go to hospital but I have been so many times and all tests have been clear.
Maybe I am just having random anxiety attacks, they come out of nowhere but I think it is something wrong in my body.
Thank You so much
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Join Date: May 2012
Location: Wisconsin, USA
Posts: 16,945
Originally Posted by BanAlcohol
Absoloutely the best and most helpful advice I have had in forever.
I am going to get off the Brandy I have been drinking for weeks now and go back on Beer and slowly reduce the amount I have.
The thing that scares me is I have massive spikes of high blood pressure even on just 4 cans of beer a day so I worry it is not Alcohol doing it, but as soon as I get to the hospital and know I am in a safe place my pressure goes down. Unfortunately there is nothing to stop my anxiety unless I go and get myself checked at the hospital, then I walk out feeling on top of the world.
Today has got to be the worst I have ever felt in forever, and I was drinking Brandy last night. My whole
body feels completely smashed, shaking inside (you can't see me shaking on the outside). I'm drinking loads of water, eating well but I cannot get rid of this shaking inside me. But again it happens on 4 cans of beer.
Seriously what you have told me, has helped me so much and given me the biggest kick to make a change, you have not scared me you have simply advised me and this is the advise I have been looking for.
Thank You and F this hangover if it is a hangover, I am so close to go to hospital but I have been so many times and all tests have been clear.
Maybe I am just having random anxiety attacks, they come out of nowhere but I think it is something wrong in my body.
Thank You so much
Ban Alcohol from your own life and get some help doing it.
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Join Date: Aug 2016
Posts: 1,645
I'm not a doctor and this is not medical advice, but I am 95% certain that your alcohol intake is contributing significantly to your anxiety, BanAlcohol.
When you abuse alcohol, your central nervous system works overtime to keep you in a heightened state of alertness to counteract the depressant effect of the alcohol. As your BAC decreases, your brain chemistry remains in that state, and the result is the opposite of alcohol intoxication - anxiety, jumpiness, shakiness, and discontent.
You should see a doctor; there are any number of factors that can contribute to baseline anxiety, but alcohol is a terrible anxiety curer. It only works while you're under the influence, and the side effects massively outweigh the temporary fix. If the "anxiety attacks" always occur as your BAC is decreasing, it's not too much of a jump in logic to attribute them to the alcohol intake.
When you abuse alcohol, your central nervous system works overtime to keep you in a heightened state of alertness to counteract the depressant effect of the alcohol. As your BAC decreases, your brain chemistry remains in that state, and the result is the opposite of alcohol intoxication - anxiety, jumpiness, shakiness, and discontent.
You should see a doctor; there are any number of factors that can contribute to baseline anxiety, but alcohol is a terrible anxiety curer. It only works while you're under the influence, and the side effects massively outweigh the temporary fix. If the "anxiety attacks" always occur as your BAC is decreasing, it's not too much of a jump in logic to attribute them to the alcohol intake.
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Join Date: Apr 2019
Posts: 11
The shaking you describe is likely attributed to your high BP if your anything like me. Any time my BP got bad, it felt like I was resonating at a very high frequency on the inside. No external shaking.
I quit drinking 25 days ago. Cold turkey and day 3 sent me to the ER with BP high 180s/121. They gave me fluids, changed my BP medication, pottasium and IV Ativan to get my BP down and sent me home.
This is my experience and your milage may vary, but it's doable.
I quit drinking 25 days ago. Cold turkey and day 3 sent me to the ER with BP high 180s/121. They gave me fluids, changed my BP medication, pottasium and IV Ativan to get my BP down and sent me home.
This is my experience and your milage may vary, but it's doable.
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Join Date: May 2010
Location: East Coast
Posts: 1,906
Originally Posted by BanAlcohol
Absoloutely the best and most helpful advice I have had in forever.
I am going to get off the Brandy I have been drinking for weeks now and go back on Beer and slowly reduce the amount I have.
The thing that scares me is I have massive spikes of high blood pressure even on just 4 cans of beer a day so I worry it is not Alcohol doing it, but as soon as I get to the hospital and know I am in a safe place my pressure goes down. Unfortunately there is nothing to stop my anxiety unless I go and get myself checked at the hospital, then I walk out feeling on top of the world.
Today has got to be the worst I have ever felt in forever, and I was drinking Brandy last night. My whole
body feels completely smashed, shaking inside (you can't see me shaking on the outside). I'm drinking loads of water, eating well but I cannot get rid of this shaking inside me. But again it happens on 4 cans of beer.
Seriously what you have told me, has helped me so much and given me the biggest kick to make a change, you have not scared me you have simply advised me and this is the advise I have been looking for.
Thank You and F this hangover if it is a hangover, I am so close to go to hospital but I have been so many times and all tests have been clear.
Maybe I am just having random anxiety attacks, they come out of nowhere but I think it is something wrong in my body.
Thank You so much
That, my friend is what you feel right before you start having seizures. That was always my big red flag.
I agree with Dee, 100%
My post wasn't intended to give you hope by tapering. It was actually the opposite of that. Most taper schedules fail because our body's chemistry is so damaged that even gradual reduction can be very very dangerous.
I tried to taper for 3-4 years. I tried 1000 different ways. In the end, my body was just too damaged to be able to bounce back without hospitalization.
I urge you to please go to the emergency room and let them admit you so you can do this safely.
Make no mistake, you can still have seizures when you're tapering. The intensity can be wide ranging and some seizures can be deadly. They can also cause permanent brain damage.
You're prolonging your pain, unnecessarily. I so wished I had believed someone when they told me what I'm telling you now.
Please trust me when I say the emergency room is the easier route.
You can do this, you just have to let go of it and go get some help. Your life can be 1000 times better than it is right now and it can be beautiful if you just give yourself a fighting chance.
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2019
Posts: 54
Can an Admin please close my account. I do not want to deal with this fear, I have tried to be greatful but a few people here are doing nothing but scaring me.
Nobody knows how I feel deep down
For those who helped me Thank You and remember that but I no longer want the fear and pressure that I am the one in the wrong.
Put yourself in my mind and you will see how dark it is to live.
Nobody knows how I feel deep down
For those who helped me Thank You and remember that but I no longer want the fear and pressure that I am the one in the wrong.
Put yourself in my mind and you will see how dark it is to live.
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Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,416
I don;t think closing your account is the answer BA.
I think, one day soon, you're going to need it.
You can simply stop posting/reading until you're ready to face this.
I hope you don't, but it's your call.
I was scared to change too - I think everyone is - it's terrifying - but one day I had to.
There was no other viable alternative.
I hope you'll make that choice soon.
D
I think, one day soon, you're going to need it.
You can simply stop posting/reading until you're ready to face this.
I hope you don't, but it's your call.
I was scared to change too - I think everyone is - it's terrifying - but one day I had to.
There was no other viable alternative.
I hope you'll make that choice soon.
D
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Join Date: May 2010
Location: East Coast
Posts: 1,906
Originally Posted by BanAlcohol
Nobody knows how I feel deep down
Put yourself in my mind and you will see how dark it is to live.
Yeah, I get how dark it is right now. It's terrifying. You want one thing to hold on to and you want to be able to do this your way. Sadly...due to the nature of the illness, it's never how we should do it. It tells us how to keep feeding it. How to keep lying to ourselves.
I wish I had the words to convince you. I'm not trying to scare you. I just want to tell you that no matter what you might think right now, medical intervention is the best , least risky way to get this problem addressed.
It's almost impossible for you to see that from your perspective though. That's another devastating aspect of this illness. It tells us we can handle it. Until we can't.
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Join Date: May 2010
Location: East Coast
Posts: 1,906
Here's a good example...if you were having a heart attack...you would call emergency services and get help, right? Or get your butt to the ER. Why? It's simple- it's could be life threatening.
Same thing here. We just don't see it the way other people do. You can't out think this any more than you can a heart attack at this stage. You need help.
Same thing here. We just don't see it the way other people do. You can't out think this any more than you can a heart attack at this stage. You need help.
Life Goes On
Join Date: Jul 2012
Location: Baltimore, Maryland
Posts: 6,069
Ban,
You are no more wrong than any one of us is or has been. I'm quite certain no one here is out to do you harm - we're all just trying to help you to get out of this mess.
The worst I can see that has happened is that people have affirmed that you have something to be frightened about - nothing that you didn't say yourself. We can't talk you out of being afraid about continuing to drink because that is a very scary prospect indeed.
Nobody knows how it is to be you; they only know how it felt for them to be stuck in that same horrible dark place.
There is a way out. But only you can walk through that door. Any number of people would love to prop you up as you do so.
O
You are no more wrong than any one of us is or has been. I'm quite certain no one here is out to do you harm - we're all just trying to help you to get out of this mess.
The worst I can see that has happened is that people have affirmed that you have something to be frightened about - nothing that you didn't say yourself. We can't talk you out of being afraid about continuing to drink because that is a very scary prospect indeed.
Nobody knows how it is to be you; they only know how it felt for them to be stuck in that same horrible dark place.
There is a way out. But only you can walk through that door. Any number of people would love to prop you up as you do so.
O
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Join Date: Oct 2012
Location: Dublin, Ireland.
Posts: 739
You want the government to ban alcohol, you want the administrators to close your account. Problem is, you can't seem to take the control over things yourself.
You are here for advice but despite the sound advice offered by a number of wise ex-drunks, you seem to disregard it.
Switching from brandy to beer etc; that's all madness. If you stop drinking, you'll be able to deal with what's left, anxiety or whatever it is.
You're scared of a seizure- I've had seizures and they are extremely scary. However, a doctor will help you avoid one.
I find it really frustrating when people ask questions and then disregard answers because they don't like them.
You are here for advice but despite the sound advice offered by a number of wise ex-drunks, you seem to disregard it.
Switching from brandy to beer etc; that's all madness. If you stop drinking, you'll be able to deal with what's left, anxiety or whatever it is.
You're scared of a seizure- I've had seizures and they are extremely scary. However, a doctor will help you avoid one.
I find it really frustrating when people ask questions and then disregard answers because they don't like them.
Forum Leader
Join Date: May 2012
Location: Wisconsin, USA
Posts: 16,945
Lots of great advice in this thread BA. We've all been where you are right now, and that's why people are sharing the truth with you. There's really no way of sugarcoating it - drinking is your problem, stopping is the solution. And if you are to the point of physical dependence ( like a lot of us were ), getting medical assistance is the only safe solution.
You will find a lot of support here but you won't find approval for things like tapering or switching they type of alcohol you drink because we know those things dont' work in your situation. I hope you reconsider leaving the site as you could benefit from the knowledge here, even if it doesn't seem like it right now.
You will find a lot of support here but you won't find approval for things like tapering or switching they type of alcohol you drink because we know those things dont' work in your situation. I hope you reconsider leaving the site as you could benefit from the knowledge here, even if it doesn't seem like it right now.
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2019
Posts: 54
Reason why I asked for account to be closed is due to the way certain people are treating me, listen...
I am 27 and I wake up in panic attacks that do not go away at all. At 27 I am being tested for cancer!
I drink at night time I go a whole day without and just drink to put myself to sleep. Since I have had to have tests done for cancer my anxiety has been severe, I don't even know how I am alive to this day with how much stress I have been under. I wake up crying every morning. I'll tell you something, this is not about me, if I am honest I do not care about myself, what I am saying is I am scared to have to tell my family and my girl if I have it.
I come here for some comfort, advise is all I want then I get a load of hard **** slammed at me when I am trying to be polite.
But to those and you know who you are, who have actually advised me and care for my feelings, I will never be able to thank you enough.
Once again it is not about me but I can't tell you how hard it is for me in my life at this stage, I cannot cope, all I do these days is stare at the time waiting for it to end, and again I honestly do not know how I have made it almost a month now with this stress.
To those who do not understand, take a minute to put yourself in my shoes and see how hard it seriously is.
I am 27 and I wake up in panic attacks that do not go away at all. At 27 I am being tested for cancer!
I drink at night time I go a whole day without and just drink to put myself to sleep. Since I have had to have tests done for cancer my anxiety has been severe, I don't even know how I am alive to this day with how much stress I have been under. I wake up crying every morning. I'll tell you something, this is not about me, if I am honest I do not care about myself, what I am saying is I am scared to have to tell my family and my girl if I have it.
I come here for some comfort, advise is all I want then I get a load of hard **** slammed at me when I am trying to be polite.
But to those and you know who you are, who have actually advised me and care for my feelings, I will never be able to thank you enough.
Once again it is not about me but I can't tell you how hard it is for me in my life at this stage, I cannot cope, all I do these days is stare at the time waiting for it to end, and again I honestly do not know how I have made it almost a month now with this stress.
To those who do not understand, take a minute to put yourself in my shoes and see how hard it seriously is.
Administrator
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,416
I understand the fear of being tested for cancer.
I hope the tests will prove negative.
It has to be said tho - and I hope you won't take it as an attack - that I've known several people in my real life, and people here who've dealt with cancer and yet stayed sober.
I know you'll say you're not strong like those people - but who do you know that until you give yourself that chance to be sober and strong?
D
I hope the tests will prove negative.
It has to be said tho - and I hope you won't take it as an attack - that I've known several people in my real life, and people here who've dealt with cancer and yet stayed sober.
I know you'll say you're not strong like those people - but who do you know that until you give yourself that chance to be sober and strong?
D
Life Goes On
Join Date: Jul 2012
Location: Baltimore, Maryland
Posts: 6,069
Ban, you know I care.
I didn't put it together until just now but realize you and my eldest are about the same age. She just went through a very deep bout of anxiety and depression and landed in about the same place as you - or maybe the next hole over. I could not leave her in this state, so took her to the Emergency Room where she admitted she was feeling suicidal. She stayed inpatient for a week and is now 200% better than she was. Are all of her problems magically solved? For sure, no. But she desperately needed a reset to even have a chance.
Ban, you need help. I know that it's enormously difficult to think about walking into the hospital to ask for that help, but I really think it must be done. Your addiction and anxiety is ruling you right now, but the real you is trying hard to stop this madness; I believe that's why you keep posting here even when you're upset with people for offering advice you don't appreciate. Is there anyone in your life that you can fully confide in that will take you to the hospital? Can one of your parents help you to get there and get past the hard part of telling them exactly what you told us? You or they need to tell them how bad off your state of mind truly is. Telling them that you are afraid about your blood pressure being high is skirting the real issue. You need to tell them how you are immobilized by your emotional state. "Waiting for it to end" is truly a horrible place to be.
I 100% believe you can go for that help yourself, but just think it could help for you to have someone help you to take that step. Right now, it IS about you and that's ok. Sometimes that's how it has to be.
O
I didn't put it together until just now but realize you and my eldest are about the same age. She just went through a very deep bout of anxiety and depression and landed in about the same place as you - or maybe the next hole over. I could not leave her in this state, so took her to the Emergency Room where she admitted she was feeling suicidal. She stayed inpatient for a week and is now 200% better than she was. Are all of her problems magically solved? For sure, no. But she desperately needed a reset to even have a chance.
Ban, you need help. I know that it's enormously difficult to think about walking into the hospital to ask for that help, but I really think it must be done. Your addiction and anxiety is ruling you right now, but the real you is trying hard to stop this madness; I believe that's why you keep posting here even when you're upset with people for offering advice you don't appreciate. Is there anyone in your life that you can fully confide in that will take you to the hospital? Can one of your parents help you to get there and get past the hard part of telling them exactly what you told us? You or they need to tell them how bad off your state of mind truly is. Telling them that you are afraid about your blood pressure being high is skirting the real issue. You need to tell them how you are immobilized by your emotional state. "Waiting for it to end" is truly a horrible place to be.
I 100% believe you can go for that help yourself, but just think it could help for you to have someone help you to take that step. Right now, it IS about you and that's ok. Sometimes that's how it has to be.
O
Forum Leader
Join Date: May 2012
Location: Wisconsin, USA
Posts: 16,945
Originally Posted by BanAlcohol
Reason why I asked for account to be closed is due to the way certain people are treating me, listen...
I am 27 and I wake up in panic attacks that do not go away at all. At 27 I am being tested for cancer!
I drink at night time I go a whole day without and just drink to put myself to sleep. Since I have had to have tests done for cancer my anxiety has been severe, I don't even know how I am alive to this day with how much stress I have been under. I wake up crying every morning. I'll tell you something, this is not about me, if I am honest I do not care about myself, what I am saying is I am scared to have to tell my family and my girl if I have it.
I come here for some comfort, advise is all I want then I get a load of hard **** slammed at me when I am trying to be polite.
But to those and you know who you are, who have actually advised me and care for my feelings, I will never be able to thank you enough.
Once again it is not about me but I can't tell you how hard it is for me in my life at this stage, I cannot cope, all I do these days is stare at the time waiting for it to end, and again I honestly do not know how I have made it almost a month now with this stress.
To those who do not understand, take a minute to put yourself in my shoes and see how hard it seriously is.
I am 27 and I wake up in panic attacks that do not go away at all. At 27 I am being tested for cancer!
I drink at night time I go a whole day without and just drink to put myself to sleep. Since I have had to have tests done for cancer my anxiety has been severe, I don't even know how I am alive to this day with how much stress I have been under. I wake up crying every morning. I'll tell you something, this is not about me, if I am honest I do not care about myself, what I am saying is I am scared to have to tell my family and my girl if I have it.
I come here for some comfort, advise is all I want then I get a load of hard **** slammed at me when I am trying to be polite.
But to those and you know who you are, who have actually advised me and care for my feelings, I will never be able to thank you enough.
Once again it is not about me but I can't tell you how hard it is for me in my life at this stage, I cannot cope, all I do these days is stare at the time waiting for it to end, and again I honestly do not know how I have made it almost a month now with this stress.
To those who do not understand, take a minute to put yourself in my shoes and see how hard it seriously is.
How about this - treat your alcohol problem just like your doctor is treating your other heath issues - because that's exactly what it is. And to be frank, your drinking is potentially a more serious threat to your life than cancer might even be. It's that serious.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2019
Posts: 54
Originally Posted by Obladi
Ban, you know I care.
I didn't put it together until just now but realize you and my eldest are about the same age. She just went through a very deep bout of anxiety and depression and landed in about the same place as you - or maybe the next hole over. I could not leave her in this state, so took her to the Emergency Room where she admitted she was feeling suicidal. She stayed inpatient for a week and is now 200% better than she was. Are all of her problems magically solved? For sure, no. But she desperately needed a reset to even have a chance.
Ban, you need help. I know that it's enormously difficult to think about walking into the hospital to ask for that help, but I really think it must be done. Your addiction and anxiety is ruling you right now, but the real you is trying hard to stop this madness; I believe that's why you keep posting here even when you're upset with people for offering advice you don't appreciate. Is there anyone in your life that you can fully confide in that will take you to the hospital? Can one of your parents help you to get there and get past the hard part of telling them exactly what you told us? You or they need to tell them how bad off your state of mind truly is. Telling them that you are afraid about your blood pressure being high is skirting the real issue. You need to tell them how you are immobilized by your emotional state. "Waiting for it to end" is truly a horrible place to be.
I 100% believe you can go for that help yourself, but just think it could help for you to have someone help you to take that step. Right now, it IS about you and that's ok. Sometimes that's how it has to be.
O
I didn't put it together until just now but realize you and my eldest are about the same age. She just went through a very deep bout of anxiety and depression and landed in about the same place as you - or maybe the next hole over. I could not leave her in this state, so took her to the Emergency Room where she admitted she was feeling suicidal. She stayed inpatient for a week and is now 200% better than she was. Are all of her problems magically solved? For sure, no. But she desperately needed a reset to even have a chance.
Ban, you need help. I know that it's enormously difficult to think about walking into the hospital to ask for that help, but I really think it must be done. Your addiction and anxiety is ruling you right now, but the real you is trying hard to stop this madness; I believe that's why you keep posting here even when you're upset with people for offering advice you don't appreciate. Is there anyone in your life that you can fully confide in that will take you to the hospital? Can one of your parents help you to get there and get past the hard part of telling them exactly what you told us? You or they need to tell them how bad off your state of mind truly is. Telling them that you are afraid about your blood pressure being high is skirting the real issue. You need to tell them how you are immobilized by your emotional state. "Waiting for it to end" is truly a horrible place to be.
I 100% believe you can go for that help yourself, but just think it could help for you to have someone help you to take that step. Right now, it IS about you and that's ok. Sometimes that's how it has to be.
O
That is what is so weird, I am positive I have alcohol withdrawal because of how I physically feel during those times but somehow they all fade once I am told "nothing is wrong with you".
I am honest with them about my consumption everytime I go, as it is an emergency centre they are not directly concerned and forward the information to my GP. I then go and see my GP and to be completely honest they (sorry I usually end up with seeing a different doctor at the place I go each time) have not even said a lot about my consumption other than to reduce the amount I am drinking slowly over a period of weeks and continue to decrease.
Today I am for the first time in a month since this scare actually feeling quite good, now how on earth can that be possible when I consumed the exact same amount of alcohol last night! It is baffling me extremely. The only thing I can think of as to why I feel better today is because I had extreme amounts of water throughout the day yesterday, but I pretty much do drink a hell of a lot of water before I have alcohol and still the next day I feel like absoloute hell.
I just can't work out why today I feel ok after having the same amount.
I absoloutely promise that I do believe despite myself feeling ok that my body still does crave the alcohol on days where I feel like hell, I have the most unexplainable symptoms, I honestly can't explain them except for being "vibrating" inside the whole of my body, feeling extremely mentally anxious, I will wake up and the second I wake up until the second I go to sleep at night my mind does not stop to say "you are going to die, go to the emergency room, something is wrong with your body, to feel like this there is something wrong, this is not right"
Then as soon as I have the all clear from blood tests etc I walk out feeling on top of the world only for my feelings to start the next day.
I am going to talk to a doctor about this what I have wrote now and see what he/she says. If I can be admitted for a detox centre I will hands down do it, if I have to go away from family and stay somewhere, there is no doubt I will do it.
For the life of me I can't work out why today I feel ok, both physically and mentally despite drinking the same amount last night but I am sure you and the other good caring people here will be able to relate and give opinions
Believe me I might not show it but to those who have helped me in this Thread you will never know how greatful I am.
I also promise I am currently not drunk, I drink from 9PM-10PM to put myself to sleep each night and that is it, I promise anything I post before 9PM is me
sober.
Thank You, please remember I am greatful for the help
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Join Date: Apr 2019
Posts: 54
Also to Scott and Dee please understand I am greatful and do listen and read deeply each thing you say I just forget to quote a lot of the time and my iPhone likes to play up a lot and not load properly, I am thankful please just remember that for me.
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