zjw

Listae my old job reminds me of what your complaining about. I despised it and like you my drinking escalated just to deal with the misery of that job. I also fell down on doing projects as well just cause it made my skin crawl do do that kinda work. In hindsite I have no idea what i must have been thinking to get into the field to begin with. I mean I think if I had really thought it through i woulda done something different for a living. But thats besides the point.

For me I quit drinking before i lost the job however. But i was miserable. like your saying you live in a location you hate and drink more because of it then of course this spirals into affecting other aspects of your life in a negative way.

I used to live in a place i hated and did this job. years ago i was able to move that solved one big problem. Then i still had this job and drank. Upon quiting the drinking that solved another big problem. After i got sober I started to clean up a lot of the other messes in my life that i made just cause of how miserable i was but i was still stuck with that thorn in my side job.

Luckily the job got removed from my sitaution. So no while my situation isnt perfect and i got a lot of problems. I honestly dont have any lingering messes from the drinking days now. Looseing that job enables me to move into a whole new direction now its rather liberating.

I'm amazed i never got fired when i drank to be honest. But while i was laid off i'm sure theres a reason i was first in line instead of someone else.

What got me to quit drinking tho was horrible panic attacks. I'm greatful for htem. I dont think anything else woulda sobered me up. I run scenarios through my head like if my wife left me would i have quit i fi lost my job would i have quit etc.. Nah probably not. those panic attacks tho they put the fear of God in me pretty quick.

listae

Thank zjw for the care in responding. Unfortunately, I loved my job but hate the location. All my friends and family live across the country. My parents have also become disabled and are in the advanced stages of degenerative diseases. So, I have to fly across the country every month and frequently for emergencies. I coped by drinking through it all and it made my career fall apart.

zjw

yeah maybe through all this tho you can relocate to someplace better? it doesnt always have to be bad. I know with my circumsntaces over the year I was lucky to have things that made my life worse removed from my situation. Who knows maybe you will relocate and find another job you like even more and get to enjoy some sober life. Life really does get better once you quit but its still not always easy.

I think for me with drinking things that make my life crappy end up making me being more inclined to drink. Things that bring joy and value to my life lead me away from the drink. So since i got sober I'm always trying to make sure the things in my life are adding value and makeing me feel better and not robbing me of value and putting me in a position where i feel like drinking. I think this has helped me stay sober when bad things happen becasue ive been able to minimize the impact by keeping everyting else as good as i can.

listae

Thanks for the advice zjw: wise words.

ardy

just got to talk to my Mom.. almost lost her this last Jan 2019 to a terrible cold and virus.. so Grateful that she sounds like my Mom. and she can repeat forever what ever is on her mind.. for my Mom sounds like my Mom. laughs like my Mom and knows who I am. once again...love you all so much..ardy