View Poll Results: Are holidays better in sobriety?
Most certianly!
51
77.27%
They're worse.
3
4.55%
Other (please explain)
12
18.18%
Voters: 66. You may not vote on this poll
Are the holidays better in sobriety?
Semi-Professional Philosopher
Thread Starter
Join Date: May 2013
Location: Rural PA
Posts: 1,021
I voted "other." A lot got better... trying to a slam a few drinks before family gatherings to take the edge off, without making it obvious I was drinking. Or being in a rush to get home so I can drink again. So the entire day I was anxious and just wanted to get the whole party and over with. So I guess being sober I don't need to worry about hiding the fact I am half in the bag at gatherings. That's the good part.
The other side is something I am still finding my way through: after I sobered up my bipolar came to the surface. So that's a unique element and this Christmas will be the first. Big crowds get to me a bit. I have our first banquet tonight and another two more over the course of the next few days.
The other side is something I am still finding my way through: after I sobered up my bipolar came to the surface. So that's a unique element and this Christmas will be the first. Big crowds get to me a bit. I have our first banquet tonight and another two more over the course of the next few days.
Member
Join Date: Jan 2018
Posts: 293
In all honesty, when I was able to drink responsibly I loved to drink on the holidays. It was a wonderful way to relax and my sense of humor was at its best. For those who can drink normally I totally get it.
That being said I am grateful to be where I am today. I will see a lot more bad then good in the drinking that goes on around me this holiday. I am glad that I am not in that place anymore and I am living my life with eyes wide open.
That being said I am grateful to be where I am today. I will see a lot more bad then good in the drinking that goes on around me this holiday. I am glad that I am not in that place anymore and I am living my life with eyes wide open.
Member
Join Date: Nov 2017
Posts: 1,065
It is the most wonderful time of the year - at least I feel that way this year. Last year, I felt like a blind kitten - but I faked it well 
A few things are different, we aren't travelling this year. I am only taking statutory holidays off, (Christmas, Boxing and New Years days), no baking, we're doing keto, well I am a cross between keto and paleo because I do no dairy and sneak in a bit of healthier fruit than just berries. Cauliflower pizza, nut cheese for me and avocado/coconut milk, cacao mousse with sour cherries is our Christmas dinner! Was done shopping in November, but time got away, I got no cards mailed and I am hitting a dollar store on the way home to buy gift bags, because I don't want to wrap LOL
On the flip side to all that, we were in every parade, which depending on the town, some are all day, family friendly celebrations. It was wonderful to connect with so many people. I dressed my horse up like a unicorn and on the last parade, held up everyone behind me, because I made a point of going over and letting kids pet her. At one point my banner was half a block ahead of me LOL She is trained to bow and the kids lit up, not as much as when Santa came, but they were pretty excited to pet my bowing unicorn. We have been enjoying the lights, except our own, (dh and I are at a stand-off, he "lost" my outdoor timer)
I am really looking forward to Monday night, I love the church service, we have been having carol sings every Sunday at church. I spent about 1/3 of what I usually spend and I think it will be the best Christmas ever. Looking forward to the family get together, my nieces and nephews are always entertaining! Tis is probably the best I have felt about Christmas since I was a kid. The best part, thank the Lord, I managed to quit in time to still enjoy it through my children's eyes as well.
A few things are different, we aren't travelling this year. I am only taking statutory holidays off, (Christmas, Boxing and New Years days), no baking, we're doing keto, well I am a cross between keto and paleo because I do no dairy and sneak in a bit of healthier fruit than just berries. Cauliflower pizza, nut cheese for me and avocado/coconut milk, cacao mousse with sour cherries is our Christmas dinner! Was done shopping in November, but time got away, I got no cards mailed and I am hitting a dollar store on the way home to buy gift bags, because I don't want to wrap LOL
On the flip side to all that, we were in every parade, which depending on the town, some are all day, family friendly celebrations. It was wonderful to connect with so many people. I dressed my horse up like a unicorn and on the last parade, held up everyone behind me, because I made a point of going over and letting kids pet her. At one point my banner was half a block ahead of me LOL She is trained to bow and the kids lit up, not as much as when Santa came, but they were pretty excited to pet my bowing unicorn. We have been enjoying the lights, except our own, (dh and I are at a stand-off, he "lost" my outdoor timer)
I am really looking forward to Monday night, I love the church service, we have been having carol sings every Sunday at church. I spent about 1/3 of what I usually spend and I think it will be the best Christmas ever. Looking forward to the family get together, my nieces and nephews are always entertaining! Tis is probably the best I have felt about Christmas since I was a kid. The best part, thank the Lord, I managed to quit in time to still enjoy it through my children's eyes as well.
Forum Leader
Join Date: May 2012
Location: Wisconsin, USA
Posts: 16,945
Every facet of my life has improved since I quit drinking. Certainly there are other issues that I have to deal with that I was trying to avoid by getting drunk, but I don't view those as a function of being sober or not - they are just life problems I have to face. And being sober absolutely makes it easier to deal with those problems.
Member
Join Date: May 2017
Location: Tyne and Wear, UK
Posts: 1,538
Going into my first sober festive period. I'm a bit nervous about it, but also looking forward to it.
I deliberately used the word nervous there, I thought I would be anxious at this time of year, when I first started sobriety I was dreading the end of the year, but I'm quite ready to take on the challenge.
I deliberately used the word nervous there, I thought I would be anxious at this time of year, when I first started sobriety I was dreading the end of the year, but I'm quite ready to take on the challenge.
Member
Join Date: Nov 2011
Location: Vashon WA
Posts: 1,035
So much better. I used to take December off from drinking, an attempt to deal with lifelong seasonal depression, but it didn't help. Really quitting made all the difference. Oh yeah, the depression is much better than ever.
Member
Join Date: Jan 2015
Posts: 1,183
I don't miss drinking during the holidays any more than I miss it the rest of the year, which is zero anyways. Everything is better sober, including the holidays, because I'm present and participating, not pickled and looking to get more pickled.
Everything is better sober, including the holidays, because I'm present and participating, not pickled and looking to get more pickled.
Member
Join Date: Oct 2018
Location: New Mexico
Posts: 1,339
I also cast my choice as "Other", as during my adult life I've never really enjoyed the holiday season. Certainly I have memories of this time of year, vague as some of them may be, as forced celebration with the spirits of the days that I was consuming. But during the times of not drinking, I've either been anxious or depressed. This year I'm somewhat impatient for the days to just be past me, albeit soberly.
Member
Join Date: Jul 2017
Posts: 3,027
Other.
As I’ve said before, life on life’s terms isn’t easy for me. It is worth it, though.
My first Xmas I was also a blind kitten. (I like it, horsie, good term) and this Xmas is a little better but with my dads sickness, my work shifts, buying gifts for everyone, making everything festive and being sober, it’s really insane. Last week I was Xmas shopping and while shopping, fielding texts from my mom, my brother, my husband, my oldest kid, my youngest kid, and texts and phone calls from work. No exaggeration. All at once.
People are texting me for help from morning to night. Advice, support, and their needs....
I get tired. I go take baths, lock the door and binge on Netflix. “Mommy needs a bath” has become replaced “mommy needs a drink” as code for leave mommy the hell alone so she doesn’t crack, and ruin your world, because she is the center of everything, and if her world cracks it’s all over.
As I’ve said before, life on life’s terms isn’t easy for me. It is worth it, though.
My first Xmas I was also a blind kitten. (I like it, horsie, good term) and this Xmas is a little better but with my dads sickness, my work shifts, buying gifts for everyone, making everything festive and being sober, it’s really insane. Last week I was Xmas shopping and while shopping, fielding texts from my mom, my brother, my husband, my oldest kid, my youngest kid, and texts and phone calls from work. No exaggeration. All at once.
People are texting me for help from morning to night. Advice, support, and their needs....
I get tired. I go take baths, lock the door and binge on Netflix. “Mommy needs a bath” has become replaced “mommy needs a drink” as code for leave mommy the hell alone so she doesn’t crack, and ruin your world, because she is the center of everything, and if her world cracks it’s all over.
Administrator
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,427
I'll be PollyAnna then
Are the holidays better in sobriety?...only in every conceivable way
I'm more engaged with my life and the people in it, I'm always 'present', I'm not running away from responsibility...I really love being an adult - even tho it took me 40 years to get there
It's true I had a lot of health issues surface that drinking (or apathy or my frequent unconsciousness) was masking too.
I'm glad I know about them now. Ignorance is not always bliss.
I'm not blaming sobriety for those - in fact, I'm in a far better place to deal with them sober.
D
Are the holidays better in sobriety?...only in every conceivable way
I'm more engaged with my life and the people in it, I'm always 'present', I'm not running away from responsibility...I really love being an adult - even tho it took me 40 years to get there
It's true I had a lot of health issues surface that drinking (or apathy or my frequent unconsciousness) was masking too.
I'm glad I know about them now. Ignorance is not always bliss.
I'm not blaming sobriety for those - in fact, I'm in a far better place to deal with them sober.
D
Member
Join Date: Jun 2014
Posts: 2,775
Originally Posted by ScottFromWI 
Every facet of my life has improved since I quit drinking. Certainly there are other issues that I have to deal with that I was trying to avoid by getting drunk, but I don't view those as a function of being sober or not - they are just life problems I have to face. And being sober absolutely makes it easier to deal with those problems.
Life has hardly been a bowel of cherries since getting sober. However it certainly is much easier sober.
Especially during the holiday season.
I can attend business and family functions and not be involved in the ugliness which sometimes occurs when people have been drinking too much.
Member
Join Date: Jul 2018
Posts: 1,312
I’m with WaterOx. I think the holidays suck too.
Went to a a family party today and found out my brother also thinks the holidays suck. We had a dysfunctional childhood and it was nice to know I wasn’t alone in my feelings about the holidays. Looks like I’ve got some company here at SR too.
Went to a a family party today and found out my brother also thinks the holidays suck. We had a dysfunctional childhood and it was nice to know I wasn’t alone in my feelings about the holidays. Looks like I’ve got some company here at SR too.
Member
Join Date: Nov 2017
Posts: 2,583
I posted yes . I have 20 plus years of experience of drinking at christmas and only 1 year (last year) of not drinking to compare and despite tbe fact that I really loved drinking at christmas and I do, or at least last year I did, miss it, my drinking always brought consequences. I either end up being really depressed and bawling my eyes out or really angry and picking a fight with someone. If by some miracle neither of those happened, I would still end up passing out after lunch and again at bedtime, feelling awful and not being present.
Last year was my first sober christmas in a looong time. I was present for my daughter, belly laughed with my family, enjoyed lots of lovely food and woke up refreshed and hangover free the day after. On the 29th December I picked up a drink. The evening ended in a physical fight with my now ex best friend in front of both our 5 year old daughter's.
I am looking forward to a sober, drama free christmas this year!!!
Last year was my first sober christmas in a looong time. I was present for my daughter, belly laughed with my family, enjoyed lots of lovely food and woke up refreshed and hangover free the day after. On the 29th December I picked up a drink. The evening ended in a physical fight with my now ex best friend in front of both our 5 year old daughter's.
I am looking forward to a sober, drama free christmas this year!!!
Currently Active Users Viewing this Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
