Drinking to self sabotage
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Join Date: Jul 2017
Location: Brit in New Zealand
Posts: 160
Originally Posted by ThomPom 
Here in Europe "self destruction" has a romantic touch to it for a lot of people, as an answer to lifes unfairness, suffering and lack of per se given sense, grounded in some philosophical schools. Often displayed in bohemic environments or in the US for example by Hank Moody in Californification. I was open for that, too.
What really helped me, was the lectures of Jordan Peterson (on youtube), who perceives suffering as an invitable part of life and asks you to create a life thats worth suffering for and contributes, so that gaining strength in the face of mailaise and even mortality. And that means you will be stronger without booze, but you have to work on your reasons to NOT self destruct you.
There is also a youtube talk of Sam Harris "why are you wasting your life away" that is quite to the point, while not directly about drinking. Harris asks you to act aware, active. And that is the opposite of numbing and destructing yourself.
I have the Peterson and Harris Talk on my Cell, listen to it regulary, just to enforce my drive to get emotionally strong and strive to give my life meaning even if this means small steps.
What really helped me, was the lectures of Jordan Peterson (on youtube), who perceives suffering as an invitable part of life and asks you to create a life thats worth suffering for and contributes, so that gaining strength in the face of mailaise and even mortality. And that means you will be stronger without booze, but you have to work on your reasons to NOT self destruct you.
There is also a youtube talk of Sam Harris "why are you wasting your life away" that is quite to the point, while not directly about drinking. Harris asks you to act aware, active. And that is the opposite of numbing and destructing yourself.
I have the Peterson and Harris Talk on my Cell, listen to it regulary, just to enforce my drive to get emotionally strong and strive to give my life meaning even if this means small steps.
I also played up to the persona of a 'tortured soul' and the girl who is a trainwreck but has a heart of gold underneath it. It as all nonsense. I was just a mess and soon people stopped finding it amusing and just found it sad and pathetic. I found myself sad and pathetic.
Eventually people get sick of people who wallow in self pity and continue to destroy themselves. Their friends - wisely - cut themselves off so they are not collateral damage. The only friends I would have been left with were also people who hated themselves but we would party just to distract ourselves from ourselves.
Luckily I nipped my drinking in the bud before I lost everything meaningful. I was sick of pretending my life was glamorous and fun when it was anything but. Having you sh** together may not be as eventful, but it is more peaceful. I will take peace over drama any day
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Originally Posted by Drillbit
I am curious about something and just want to see if it resonates with anyone else..
I watched the film flight earlier, there's some pretty powerful scenes where the main character is drinking to destruction and for some reason it triggered me to want to drink.
I've also experienced this recently when out with friends, the trigger was at the point when they were absolutely wasted and displaying the worst behaviours.
This got me thinking if there's a psychological reason for these triggers and potentially an underlying reason for my drinking, whether it being low self worth or feeling deserving of the mayhem and destruction etc
Any thoughts?
I watched the film flight earlier, there's some pretty powerful scenes where the main character is drinking to destruction and for some reason it triggered me to want to drink.
I've also experienced this recently when out with friends, the trigger was at the point when they were absolutely wasted and displaying the worst behaviours.
This got me thinking if there's a psychological reason for these triggers and potentially an underlying reason for my drinking, whether it being low self worth or feeling deserving of the mayhem and destruction etc
Any thoughts?
Thanks for reminding me of the concept of self-sabotage.
I hadn't thought about it in years, but it used to be something I did routinely.
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