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One More Day Part 3

Old 09-22-2018, 08:53 AM
  # 21 (permalink)  
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ja, i get that, O. being in that spot of no oomph or strong desire....often i felt that i SHOULD want it more but was too dragged down.
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Old 09-22-2018, 09:45 AM
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Originally Posted by Obladi View Post
So good to hear you are on or about 3 months, Tyne. Where will you be going for your holiday?
All going well, up to Northern Scotland for the first one and then over to Indianapolis for the 2nd. Got friends in that state and in Ohio that I'd like to see, plus I wouldn't mind taking in a Colts game and perhaps some NASCAR if it's on.
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Old 09-22-2018, 05:33 PM
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So fini, where did you get it?

Tyne, sounds great. What will the weather be like in Scotland?
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Old 09-22-2018, 06:11 PM
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Texas is about a zillion times better than either Indiana or Ohio!
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Old 09-22-2018, 07:22 PM
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i got it, repeatedly, from getting very pissed off at myself. that would kickstart me into oomph.
anger has often been a good motivator for change for me.

( but ultimately the oomph didn't result in ongoing sobriety; the oft- mentioned surrender did. i only mention this in order to be truthful. oomph is needed to get out of the starting gate. by me, anyway)
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Old 09-23-2018, 12:31 AM
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Originally Posted by Obladi View Post
So fini, where did you get it?

Tyne, sounds great. What will the weather be like in Scotland?
That part of Scotland is known for being windy, so I'll be taking a coat. I've been to Scotland before, but I've wanted to go to the very top for years.

Snazzy, I don't know anyone in Texas, perhaps I will visit one day. Wouldn't mind seeing The Alamo.
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Old 09-23-2018, 04:28 AM
  # 27 (permalink)  
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Originally Posted by Obladi View Post
I guess I wasn't clear about the wanting. I wish I had the desire (stronger desire? ) to get well. I mean obviously I have some desire because I'm here talking about it incessantly. But at the same time, it's not enough "want" to make it stick. Does that make sense?

Like I'm all talk no action and I wish it were different. But I've no oomph to get me there.
Yup, definitely get that, kept ordering the tshirt. But then went rogue one day , applied what I learned about AVRT , heard the AV saying it was just a lark and then just kept shunting It.

Life isn't much different, except all the differences that came/come from no more booze. Wouldn't trade it for the world, hard to explain how that can be/seem so huge and small at the same time.
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Old 09-24-2018, 11:19 PM
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O,

You should re-read your posts when you have stopped for a bit.

You have such a spark.

That is O.

XX
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Old 09-25-2018, 03:17 PM
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Thanks, Drops. In general, I cringe at re-reading anything I've written more than something like 24-hours ago, but I can try to give it a go.

Broster, in my experience once I'm able to reduce something to so simple and so huge at the same time, I've come upon the right answer. So I get that. But it's a gut thing, isn't it? Like I can appreciate intellectually that the answer to not drinking is Not Drinking but somehow I can't feel it. It's frustrating in the extreme. Except for I remember seeing how remarkably simple it was when I was sober.

Yep. Frustrating.
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Old 09-26-2018, 08:39 AM
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Originally Posted by Dropsie View Post
I really made drinking no longer an option, so whether I wanted to drink, change, stand on my head no longer mattered. Because wanting no longer mattered because it had been decided -- I dont drink.

Looking back did I really want to change, not sure.

But I could no longer live with the moral consequences of my behaviour or the impact on my friends and especially my children and partner. I am a nice person. I love my girls and my man and my dog and my friends. So I had no choice -- in the I-dont-kick-my-dog kinda way.

What I did not realize, I dont think anyone really does until they stop, is the enormous freedom sobriety gives.

Its why we all want to shake our friends who are struggling, like you O and our dear Cow, because it is so much better on the other side for reasons you can't even fathom until you get there.

Takes trust.

Trust me.
Well said
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