SickInLove

I just needed to admit it here so that I can remember this post. I did a overnight trip to Las Vegas this week. I KNEW it wasn’t a good idea but I had purchased tickets to take my 7 year old to a show there months ago and it meant the world to her and I didn’t want to let her down. I was doing great when we first got there, replaced my craving (and money I would have spent on booze) with a great sushi dinner for her and I. Then we went back to our room and got ready for the concert.

I got us both cherry Coke’s from the bar to drink while we got ready, with no temptation to order a alcoholic drink. We went, we waited in the hour long line to get into the show and THEN it happened. A cocktail waitress came up and asked me if I wanted a drink . I ordered a water and a double vodka soda. I drank it during the concert and although I had a great time with my daughter.. I couldn’t help But feel guilty. I ruined my sobriety that I had worked so hard for all month.

So here I am, back on day 3. The difference this time is I did not let that one drink turn into days of drinking like I used to.. I hope that means something. When we got home from Vegas there was half a bottle of wine here that my husband had bought. I immidiatly poured it out. Thanks for listening to my rambling

ScottFromWI

Glad you checked in SickInLove. I think accountability and honesty are 2 very important pieces of getting ( and staying ) sober. I'm glad it didn't turn into a worse binge too - and it does mean something. Having said that, don't minimize the fact that you did make a clear decision to drink when you could have also just ordered 2 waters.

Not suggesting that you beat your self up, but do look back on where things went wrong and try to learn from it. If you could go back and do it all over again what could you have done differently? Could you have prepared more prior to going on the trip? Should you have not gone? Those kinds of questions will help you strenghthen your plan for next time a similar situation arises.

SickInLove

You are right and this is where I struggle most. I need a plan in place for when I go out. At home it’s easiest for me to not drink, my kids are watching me, I keep alcohol out of the house. When I’m in social situations it’s much harder. I know the best thing would have been to not go. Obviously Las Vegas is the worse place for a recovering alcoholic. I didn’t want to let my daughter down and she had a amazing time but I definitely won’t be planning anymore trips there for a while. I need to sit down and write out a plan so that this does not happen again. My guilt is overwhelming, because I know I could have said no to that drink.

ScottFromWI

What's important is that you learn from it, and it sounds like know exactly what you need to do. I'm not sure that Vegas itself would have been any more tempting than going to the same concert anywhere else - so it's important to make your plan applicable anywhere, right?

FBL

First off, one drink does NOT totally erase any progress you made during your sober time. It sounds like you really have learned some things. Don't beat yourself up. Dust yourself off and focus on your recovery. Helps to have some sort of recovery plan in place, so there won't be another slip.

BDTL

Making mistakes is human. Owning up and moving on is fantastic so hold your head up, plan ahead for possible slip ups and keep focusing on sobriety.

SickInLove

Thank you.. I’m feeling pretty terrible about myself. My depression has kicked in pretty bad which is why I posted here.

Helianthus

It's inspiring to me that you have the strength to come back and admit that you had a weak moment instead of slinking away to have more so thank you for your post. Well done on day three keep it up

SickInLove

Thank you.. there are times I feel support from this community. There are times that I feel like “regulars” aren’t as suppportive for certain people.

SickInLove

Honestly I feel like on this board I think some people comment and support certain treads. I wish that weren’t the case but I don’t feel supported by EVERYONE. I think certain people comment on certain threads. I don’t feel fully supported on this site, I wish I did. I’d probably comment more.

FBL

There are A LOT of different threads on these boards and we can't comment on every one. You may find more "action" by posting this in the newcomers section. I think you've gotten some terrific responses here so far!

SickInLove

I guess so .. I’ve posted numerous times and I don’t get the same responses as other threads. Maybe this just isn’t the site for me. I wish I received more support but just don’t get it here.. not sure why.

SickInLove

Peace out guys ✌🏻

FBL

Sick, are you on FaceBook? There's some great recovery communities on there too. I belong to a couple of them. There's one (Shair) that even has online face-to-face meetings! You may find that type of support more to your liking.

Dee74

I dunno about anyone else but its been a crazy busy day for me & I'm literally seeing this thread for the first time

I'm glad you made it back and I hope you decide to keep posting SIL.

Your posts and threads are every not as valuable as mine or anyone elses.

Don't let your AV get at you that way

come join the weekender and or the 24 hour Recovery Connections thread in the Newcomers and Daily Support forums - I promise you will not be ignored

D

slipnslide

I’ve felt this way too, being a new member and having messed up multiple times. I sometimes feel the support isn’t there but maybe... superiority? But then you have to sit back and remember the state of mind you’re in when positing: feeling guilt and shame and ... like you aren’t a good person. So maybe, at least this is what I tell myself, it isn’t what is actually being said by these other members but my perception of what they are saying. Because I’m being defensive? I don’t know. Hope you don’t leave.

SickInLove

Thank you for responding , I was wondering if there was anything on Facebook. I will definitely join that group.

MyLittleHorsie

Could be time of day. I post different times throughout the day because my schedule allows it, but some other people are constrained by work and obligations. The newcomers section gets the most action and I know I have skimmed a thread before and thought to come back, later that same day and it's buried on the 3rd page. This section is a lot slower moving, I look at newcomers as acute care and this one as long term care.


I don't think there is any reason you couldn't pm someone whose advice you want.

SickInLove

You are right, I could be feeling defensive. It’s hard when you are a new member and you feel like you are being ignored. I’m also a bit nervous to post on here because the last time I posted asking everyone their opinions on AA vs other types of recovery groups..because I was trying to work up the courage to go to a meeting, some people got rude (not to me) and the post got taken down. Anyways thank you for responding and giving me a different perspective that I needed to hear.

SickInLove

Thank you Dee, I was wondering if there was some place I could post when I was feeling down or tempted by my AV. I was unaware of those threads but I will go find them now.