Gottalife

I didn't mean to seem Like I was picking on you SK. I really appreciate your honesty. It is one of the key ingredients to permanent recovery.

SolidKarma

Can someone give me some advice. I tried to come back to this forum for support, but I just don't feel like it's bringing any relief.

I'm going through one of the hardest times of my life. I'm doing everything possible.

I have a plan that i'm working towards. I'm working closely with a sponsor. I'm seeing a doctor, a drug and alcohol counselor, going to meetings.

Maybe I should just stop posting here, I feel like i'm a nuisance to the forum.

Sorry everyone.

I honestly have no idea how anyone can stay sober from this forum. It seems like any post I write about the response I get is "yea that was a bad idea, don't do it"

If it was that easy why would I be here?

BullDog777

there is a collective base of knowledge here. How you chose to use that is solely up to you.

In one breath you're asking for advise, then in another, you don't like the kind you're getting.

Maybe you're just not liking what it is that you're hearing.

I can only offer my own experience. if that doesn't apply to you, don't take it. I don't do this for the imact i'm making on anyone here. i'm doing it for what I get out of it.

If someone benefits from it, awesome, if not...so be it.

Maybe you need to approach this from an aspect of having thicker skin. Nobody here is trying to do anything but help you.

SolidKarma

Thicker skin?

thanks, that helps alot.... i'm broken, my skin is non existent. I'm glad you are so strong.

SolidKarma

How do I close my account? is that possible

BullDog777

I wish you all the best. I hope you find what you need.

Gottalife

Hey SK, I am sorry you are down in the dumps today. I had moments like that too, sometimes I thoguht the sky was going to fall on me. If my experience is anything to go by, it will pass. Juts keep talking if you can.

You shared a bit of good news too. It seems your meeting with your sponsor went very well and you have their support in attending small meetings where yuo feel more comfortable. They also gave you 1.5 hours of their time, which I doubt they would do if they didn't think there was hope for you. Things may actually be a lot better than they seem.

Have you had anything to eat today? Sometimes we can get down just because we missed a meal. Simple little things can sometimes trip us up.

Maybe it wouls also be an idea to call one of your AA friends, and see how they are. That used to work quite well for me.

I hope you don't leave us. You are valued and appreciated here.

andyh

hang in there SK, you're doing the best you can, keep going. I'm rooting for you

your Doctor has prescribed you the detox meds to get you safely through withdrawal. you may not feel 100% after detox, but you'll be past the danger period.

the "Ignore" function is very useful for unhelpful posters

SolidKarma

Thank you. How do you I do the ignore function?

andyh

click on the poster's name above their avatar on the left & there will be an option to add them to your ignore list.

SolidKarma

Thank you for the kind words. I've been trying to eat regular meals, healthy stuff.

I am also talking to many of my friends in AA and they have been supportive. But I just feel like it doesn't matter anymore.

I'm not trying to argue, and I don't see how I've neglected to take peoples advice.

SolidKarma

That is the best feature i've found on here. Thanks for telling me.

Dee74

I'm glad you've decided to stay SK

I've said this before so I'm not addressing anyone in particular, but
while I believe tough love has its place, there needs to be a prior relationship between two parties for tough love to 'work.

I believe everyone who posted here really is trying to help, but without that relationship you can run the danger of coming across as some random shouty jerk on an internet forum.

D

August252015

SK- I too am glad you are still here. And I probably come off as a "shouty internet jerk" sometimes- when I do, there's probably a couple of reasons: one, a character defect of mine is being a know-it-all (boy did I get variations on that on school reports ) so my ego can creep in (to wit, one of Daredevil's long threads where I had to self-correct)....but I think MOST of the reason I might seem - direct, stern, dramatic, adamant, whatever it might strike a reader - is because this disease kills.

No one around here- or IRL- is perfect. I believe most of us sincerely want to help each other and that can be delivered in so many ways!

I hope you stick around and that you have a nice sober day.

Lpg

SK please hang about everyone here has the best intentions. Tough love doesn't work for me either I'm very chicken hearted but they come from a good place. Your broken and probably exhausted, if your anything like me I over think things people say/do and things I say/do in return.

This is a great place for support everyone has been in your position before. We all need each other for the forum to work. If you dont like responses turn a blind eye and focus on the support YOU need. We all routing for you, you can do it. This place has been my saviour it even got me into my first AA meeting. I never would have went if I didn't post here first. Please stick at it.

Well wishes to you

Obladi

SK, I recognize that feeling of having no skin at all to protect me from any perceived criticism or slights. I've been following your story and gain strength from reading about someone who is at the beginning (again) like I am. So thank you for being here and expressing yourself so honestly.

About that meeting where no one approached you. I had the same experience and was baffled because no one offered any help to me after the meeting. In addition to your insight that we could have approached someone, it also occurred to me much later that I didn't ask for help. I simply announced where I was and assumed people would know to reach out to me. It's hard, asking for help, but something I think we all need to learn to do.

Let's keep going, eh?

O

VigilanceNow

So sorry that this happened SolidKarma, and don’t let this get you down so much that you give up.

At one point I tried home detox by tapering... this can be a successful method, but you need to have someone else there to keep you from indulging in the urge to just give in and get wasted. That happened to me, and I ended up in the ER needing serious detox.

I wish you the best of luck in finding a solution that you stick with!

LadyBug66

Hi Solid Karma, Thank you for sharing your story. I am just a little over 6 months and it's good for me to read this so I can stay on top of my recovery. How easy it would be to slip up again. On the subject of people not being supportive.... In my early days of sobriety I remember posting that I was having a tough time dealing with not having fun and me not being fun if I wasn't drinking. One person posted something to the effect of .... yeah, if you were having all that fun why are you here? That's not exactly what that said but pretty close. It hurt my feelings but you know, they were right. It's something I go back to pretty frequently. Hang in there and please don't quit SR. It's a great place and I feel it has saved my life.

Lpg

Hey SK how's it going?

SolidKarma

Hi guys,

Thanks for the kind words. Dee hit it on the head, tough love for me works with close relationships. It's been hard to come back here because my feelings get hurt easily right now, as i'm newly sober and my emotions are out of control.

I'm doing okay, today is day 3 for me. I've finished my detox meds, so now just trying to get on a good plan/path.

Much love to everyone.