Shitzupuppy

Hi,
Back and ready to admit that on my last day of vacation, at day 367,I drank.
My beast won.
And it won for 2 weeks more, drank vodka like water.

God help me stop again.

Dave42001

What's done is done. get up dust yourself off and get back in the saddle.. You know what it's going to take!! Go for it!! Wishing you the best..

Forward12

It didn't win, you allowed the monster out of its cage. What happened?

Dee74

I'm sorry you drank Shihtzupuppy but I'm glad you made it back.

At least now you've conformed that drinking alcohol will always be the same for you.

Will you be making a revised Big Plan again?

Mtphc

It sucks doesn't it, then you have to worry about withdrawal eventually and that's where the vicious cycle begins, you could taper but that's almost impossible for alot of us.

Good luck with your recovery, hope you get sober soon

waynetheking

Try again. There's no other choice. You can't live this way. Take it one day at a time.
Hang in there buddy.

trachemys

OK.

Now do two years.

Shitzupuppy

I’m recommitting to staying sober every day. I have been feeling in a funk about the past 10-12 weeks. I need to shake it off and get back to my regular good routine!

biminiblue

Experiment over. I'm assuming it was a big fat FAIL?

Good. Summer is much better sober! I'm glad you made it back, we truly don't get unlimited chances.

I'd say, keep posting. Join up in the May thread. Talk it out.

SnazzyDresser

Thataway, get back on track and back to what works aka sobriety. Leave that alcohol in the dust far behind.

Shitzupuppy

Thanks, it wasn't an experiment in moderation. It was that I wanted that drink and high feeling. Me or my Beast or AV. I wasn't thinking beyond that immediate moment.
Then it spiraled for 2 weeks ending up in a pint of vodka in about 3 hours friday and trouble at home.
I guess I had to be reminded how much I could lose.

biminiblue

No it was an experiment in drinking alcoholically. That's the way we drink, right?

I'm not trying to argue with you. Obviously it didn't give you whatever it was you were looking for. Did you take that first drink thinking it was going to be fun, moderate - or two weeks of misery?

BDTL

I won't fuss because I know how fragile sobriety can be. I will said good health, sound mind, and strong body are a good incentive to work hard at another day booze free.

Hevyn

Hi Shitzu - I'm glad you wanted to talk about what happened. I did the same thing once after 3 yrs. sober. I didn't have the sense to stop, & years went by before I got my life back. I never want to forget that horrible time. Proof that I can never have 'just one' - ever.

You learned something, & you're back with more resolve than ever. I'm glad you didn't let it take over your life once again.

Shitzupuppy

BBlue, I didn't really think beyond wanting that drink.

I'm glad to be back too. Thanks everyone for the support.

saoutchik

I'm so glad your back puppy. You have that year of sobriety in the bank, your body will appreciate it. Well done for stepping of the treadmill after only 15 days or so too. Turn this into a blip.

NYCDoglvr

So what are you doing differently this time?

SoberLeigh

I am so sorry to hear that, puppy. The only good choice from here is to recommit to recovery and move forward

Examine your Plan and shore up the holes. You mentioned feeling in a funk prior to the drinking. Be sure to put contingencies in place for times like those.

SR is a great place to come when you are feeling in a funk or feeling triggered. There are always people who will stand with you and help you kick your AV to the curb.

As for moderation, I tried valiantly to prove that I could do so. Every single attempt resulted in failure.

Stronger2017

Sorry to hear about the drinking. I did something similar. A couple of years sober and then I drank. It took about 18 months to get sober again. I have no specific advice but just do whatever it takes to get stopped. I was miserable those 18 months as, even when nothing bad happened, the fun had been taking right of drinking. All the best🙂

CreativeThinker

Hi Shitz- Sorry to hear of your relapse...BTDT too many times to count. Like many here have said, at least you're back and recommitted. Try to see it as just a blip and learn from it.

CT