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Old 07-19-2018, 03:34 AM   #361 (permalink)
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Warrior Queens, I like it.

I guess maybe my brain is recharging. It's like I don't have a thought in my head aside from getting through every day. It's not an arduous thing at all, it's just like... being on a journey. Through Nebraska. I know I'm getting somewhere, but there are no landmarks to measure my progress.

I always knew there was no life for me to recover, bemoaned it actually. I think I have it in me somewhere to instead find some wonder in the life I can construct. The term "baby steps" always turned me off when I was younger. I'm now at the age of the woman who used to make me cringe with the expression and I'm finding that makes sense. For me. Right now.

Eldest recently posted that being a grown-up is hard but she has learned that she can figure things out. I still have to remind myself of this, but really I'm at the point where I can start imagining how things can be. And making them happen.

Who says I can't retire to a tiny house on the water? All I need is a friend with the right back yard.

Physically: Headache is gone!
Mentally: Steady
Spiritually: Neutral

Day 38
(I keep having to double-check myself now. 38? yep, 38)
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Old 07-19-2018, 08:14 AM   #362 (permalink)
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i found/find a realistic imagining of how things can be to be a really useful exercise. soooo different from the unrealistic fantasizing when drinking.

38...awesome!
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Old 07-19-2018, 09:30 AM   #363 (permalink)
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Keep it up ,sis, and pretty soon you'll be like " hm. . wuldya look at that... I'm a teetotaler, go figure"
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Old 07-19-2018, 05:41 PM   #364 (permalink)
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Haha! Yep, Nebraska it is. I'm sure we can find a good coffee shop around here somewhere in all these dusty plains.

I've been trying to make my way to Colorado or heck, even Wyoming, but this brown landscape abounds.

Just keep driving.
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Old Yesterday, 03:10 AM   #365 (permalink)
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Put the convertible top down and enjoy the wide open spaces.
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Old Yesterday, 03:30 AM   #366 (permalink)
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Thelma.
I need a Louise.
No guns please.

Day 39
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Old Yesterday, 07:32 AM   #367 (permalink)
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The beast is squirrelly today. It's telling AV to suggest perhaps just doing an experiment - "Let's just try 1/2 pint and see how it goes. If you don't get sick after an hour, we can get more."

Stupid beast. Who cares that today is Friday? It's the same now as it was when it was yesterday. And I don't drink now.

Will reconcile myself to the edgy feeling if that's how it's going to be right now. I'm not drinking today. And that's all there is to it.
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Old Yesterday, 08:12 AM   #368 (permalink)
Marchia in Aeternum
 
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Bedamned squirrely beast! (boy, that freaked the spellchecker)

Real feelings are the goal.
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Old Yesterday, 08:41 PM   #369 (permalink)
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Doing ok still O?

It's lying. Don't get sucked back into its trap.
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Old Today, 01:18 AM   #370 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Obladi View Post
Thelma.
I need a Louise.
No guns please.

Day 39
Hold the cliffs too!
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