Harley1973

I’m 2 days out of a detox center and I just can’t seem to focus, depression, guilt and shame is killing me. This go round was a 2 week 24/7 bender that landed me in a 7 day detox facility. They did a Valium taper to wean me off.

soberandhonest

Hi Harley! Thanks for posting. The only advice that I can give is to let go the guilt and shame - they serve very little purpose. You will have to deal with the consequences of your drinking. You have to accept those consequences, but you don't have to add guilt and shame to them. Let those emotions go. Whatever you did was at least partially rooted in a disease for which you are not at fault. Don't drink today. Just get through it. Tomorrow will be easier. Sending support your way.

biminiblue

The further I got from my last drink, the less I beat myself up.

Hang on. It takes a bit of time, but if you don't drink it will all get sorted. Right now your brain and body are still recovering from a very serious illness, so be gentle. Lots of food, sleep, water, and fresh air.

doggonecarl

Normal for early recovery. It's vital that you stay sober. The withdrawals only get worse with every relapse.

What are you doing post-detox to ensure you stay sober?

Done4today

Guilt and shame won't kill you. Drinking alcohol will. Stay sober, get a recovery program and you'll see that guilt and shame turn to gratefulness and humbleness.

Good luck

tomsteve

glad ya made it through that.
Harley, this is where the rubber hits the road. this is when its necessary to get into action with a recovery program. this is when ya dont drink even if your ass falls off. this is when there aint no drink worthy event. this is when there aint nothing a drink will make better.

soooo, whats your plan of recovery? whats the actions youre going to do?

totfit

Unfortunately, I have been there with similar feelings multiple times in my life. There is no easy way go quickly feel good about ourselves afterwards. Taking steps "toward the light" or pointing oneself in the proper direction and taking steps that way will bring those feelings of guilt and shame further and further into the rear view. It is flat out amazing how doing the next right thing over time can take us exponentially far from feeling like a POS.

NYCDoglvr

Are you in a recovery program? I don't think substituting drinking with nothing works. What you feel is fairly typical of early sobriety but if you work on yourself, it passes. Get 90 days of sobriety and you'll feel different. AA is all over the country and it costs $1.

MindfulMan

You are in a very precarious place. The relapse rate for someone coming out of detox without some sort of rehab is very high.

To maximize your chances, I hope that you have some kind of recovery plan going forward, and that you stick to it. If it's going to meetings, seeing a therapist, getting into some sort of inpatient or outpatient rehab program, a psychiatrist to medically treat the depression. It's crucial that you have support to become sober rather than
just abstinent.

Focus on what you need to do, not what you have done. You can't change the past, but you can prevent the same behaviors from recurring in the future. You are not the only recovering addict/alcoholic who is suffering a lot of regret in early sobriety....people deal with it and move on to recovery.

Good luck on your journey, and work it!

SteelRes211

Stay sober the brain fog will lift with time. Back burner the shame and guilt feelings for now you can work on that later, just strive everyday not to drink again. Good luck to you from another Ohioan.

anxiousrock

I find the shame and guilt best dealt with when talked about to others so coming here is a great option. AA is also good. Full of people who just got out of inpatient and it’s part of their recovery plan.

Dee74

How goes it Harley?

D

Ken0331

Yeah, that brain fog takes a while to shake clear.

What's your plan to stay sober this time?


It was suggested to me I'd start feeling more self-worth when I started to do things that were worthy.

Mtphc

Yeah the first week sucks really bad, especially after a bender like that. Give it some time, you should start feeling a lot better after a couple weeks.

Harley1973

Well I’m still hanging in there. I have no energy, all I do is lay around and eat all day. I’ve got so many chores to do around the house but I just can’t get motivated.. God I wish I could feel good again like I did a month ago before the 2 week bender hit.

Harley1973

Thank you for alll your replies .

biminiblue

You will feel good again.

I would journal everything you are feeling right now so you never forget. The lack of memory of how bad this is trips up so many newly sober people.

Smarie78

Hang in there! I have been there for the aftermath of many a' benders with my ex. (In fact he is on one now). He usually did about 10 days to 2 weeks 24/7 drinking. Everytime he finished one he would get sucked into a deep depression and literally just binge watch television for the days during and following the detox. It's tough because I didn't want to keep saying "it's ok" because it wasn't, but at the same time there was no use in repeating what he already knew and was feeling. Just feel your feelings, try not to get too upset over the insanity of it, and get to a program or something you can do DIFFERENTLY to avoid the pattern. Something you've never done and you may get a result you never got.

Hang in there, feel your feelings, when you're done put them away in a box and put a program into place. Best of luck to you!