Cottontop1

Does anyone have experience working the steps with a dissociative disorder. I am starting step 4 and my face is quite numb which is a common symptom for me when emotionally overwhelmed. I am 27 days sober and concerned and want to know if dissociative symptoms improve with working the steps

Gottalife

The only way I found out about what effect the steps would have was to work the steps and see. I found they could not be understood in advance.

Step four seems to be a big issue with many folk. It was never meant to be, but some groups and lines of sponsorship, with a bit of help from the rehab industry, have complicated the hell out of it. It can look like a very daunting step and I think this is one of the main reasons so many never get past it and end up doing the 'AA three step" i.e. 123drink.

It was meant to be a simple process and if, like me, one finds it too difficult to tackle alone, one ought to be able to work it with their sponsors help. I had great difficulty understanding the meaning of words as they applied to me. It helped enormously to have my sponsor there to help me understand. We did my fourth together in the course of a Saturday afternoon, and did step five the following day.

Ken0331

Step 4 seems to overwhelm a lot of people.

Thing is, I was always doing something akin to it when I drank. I'd get awful damn sorry over the crap I'd done in my life I wasn't proud of, and try to drink it away.

All I had to do was get a lot of that stuff written down on paper and share it with my sponsor. Not so hard after all.

entropy1964

I recommend doing the steps with a sponsor while seeing a counselor. Sponsors aren't counselors and many don't understand co-occurring mental illness issues at all....and they shouldn't have to. I have also had the experience that some more 'hard liner' sponsors don't really accept that most mental illnesses aren't just untreated alcoholism. So, do the steps, mental illness vanishes. That isn't always the case....I know this from personal experience. I have re-traumatized myself on multiple occasions doing step 4/5 and just 'hoping' God will take it all away. Nope. So I did my step 4-5 slowly, with my counselor. That's what worked for me.

Ken0331

Now that is an awesome idea!

treeguy24

If you mean feelings of unreality, feeling like the world isn't real or feeling out of it, then ya I wound say a lot of people here who have drank and then started recovery will tell you it's not uncommon. The technical term would be depersonalization. It's just something that may come at times, but the important thing is to stay calm and it will pass. It takes time for your brain to get back to normal after it's become used to having a substance every day.

I'm not sure if that's what you were referring to when you say dissasociation. If this is what you mean then know it's normal, and it should go away with time.

MindfulMan

I'm doing Steps 4-5 with my therapist, who has also been through recovery (for sex addiction) and has worked the steps himself. The best of both worlds.

I do the resentments in two steps. The first is to write out a free-form "character assassination." No holds barred and letting out the anger and resentment. The second step, and where we spend most of the time, is discussing my part in it, what I could have done better. Because therapy we often delve into the "why" I may react or handle a situation in a certain way, and figure out alternative strategies when difficult situations come up.

It's been going pretty well so far, it also helps that a therapist is trained to deal with mental health issues as well as addiction, as well as being helpful with anxiety that might arise.

Cottontop1

Thank you for your replies. Made it through my 4th step sober. Anxiety symptoms lessening, but still coming and going. Your reassurance helped. Teia

Ken0331

Outstanding!

jrspinks

What I was talking about within the first Month man. It's like a confused Delirious state, and yeah I would definitely say it's rather Disconnected with everything, it's highly strange.

PeacefulWater12

Well done.

SoberCAH

Congratulations on your ardent pursuit of the 12 Steps.

That is what working the program is all about.

I agree with the indispensability of getting and using a sponsor to help you with the steps.

The 4th step was very difficult for me to do because I knew it would be like looking into the mirror.

And I knew that there wasn't much I would like or respect when I did.

But the rest of the 12 Steps are about repairing that damage and they teach us how to live on a daily basis which doesn't have to include the repetition of the mistakes we made during our alcoholic lives.

Glad you're here and working the 12 Steps.

Please continue to keep us posted.

luck99

well done keep going

Intothebluesky

Yes that can be a unnerving feeling/experience. I will sometimes experience depersonalization or dissociation. Sometimes in or after meetings. Sort of through memories jumping back into my mind. Talking about it takes some of the fear out and allows you to describe your experience. Connect with others who get this.

Stayingsassy

I had that feeling in spades in the first couple months. I think my brain couldn't take all the lucid reality so it would kind of check out on its own. It got better.