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Can't ignore it today

Old 12-30-2017, 08:31 AM
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Lpg
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Can't ignore it today

Oh my word today I'm struggling.... Bad. Trying to stay away from the house as my fiancé is out and I know iw there is alcohol at home.

I've cried all the way home, I want to drink and for some reason today I feel angry resentful and jealous. I'm lonely and I really feel it especially this time between Xmas and new year, everyone's out and I have no one. Iv even started to convince myself that my partner is being controlling and that I don't have a problem at all.

Today it has hit me like a tonne if bricks.
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Old 12-30-2017, 08:47 AM
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If your newly sober, and I assume you are, find something to do to distract your mind from drinking. Most of my cravings came from dwelling on how I felt.

Also, know that how you feel will be all over the place for a while. That's normal. Don't overreact and do something, like drinking, that you will regret.

I hope you feel better. Stay strong!
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Old 12-30-2017, 08:57 AM
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Your addiction will tell you whatever it needs to, make you feel whatever it needs to, to make you drink.

If your commitment is to sobriety you won't let your addiction have its way.
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Old 12-30-2017, 08:58 AM
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I know how that feels....remember it is the AV. Try playing the tape forward, eating a large amount of food, going for a run... anything. Drinking won't make you feel better. The memory is fresh for me. I felt better for at most 30mins. After that it was like entering the gates of hell again. Hang on and keep posting.
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Old 12-30-2017, 08:59 AM
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I cried for a month. If anyone so much as looked at me...

Hang on.

How are you now?
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Old 12-30-2017, 09:15 AM
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Thanks guys I need to see these replys. Today iv lost all reason in the space of a few hours and went off at the deep end with my emotions . My brain just went into overdrive.

This is torture I was feeling so great.
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Old 12-30-2017, 09:20 AM
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It's tough in the beginning.

I sat in a lot of AA meetings in early sobriety, crying for an hour straight. They helped sometimes, sometimes they made it worse - it was good to know I would be normal someday. Scary in the meantime though.

Try some calming sounds. If you have a white noise machine, turn that on. I listened to a lot of classical instrumental music in early days. You can go to Pandora and search for Classical music...

Here's one I like, "Classical for the Soul"
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Old 12-30-2017, 09:38 AM
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It is OK to cry.
I had to be told that a lot in the beginning. I didn't have to stuff or smother my emotions with bad behaviours that were just going to hurt me.

Do you have any sober friends or family you could spend time with, or even call?
Local AA chapters often have 24 hr gatherings on Christmas Eve/Day and New Years to support people and share some comraderie.
Do you have any other outlets to let off some steam? Journal? Run? Punch a pillow? Scream in a field?
You are not alone. Don't just ignore your feelings, accept they are there but also that you don't need to respond to them by drinking.

You are here, which means... you are not alone. And you are in a good, safe place. The ups and downs are pretty intense in the beginning. Keep posting and reading, and let that bring you some light... you are not alone. It will get better.
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Old 12-30-2017, 09:39 AM
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I'm also on board with hitting up AA will be a very good idea. There will be tons of support for you to get there.
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Old 12-30-2017, 10:22 AM
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If you drink your gonna have to quit again sometime. So why put yourself thru all that misery again.
Stay strong, stay sober and let these crappy emotions past. They will. Trust us. It's part of healing and your doing just that.
Hang in there!
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Old 12-30-2017, 10:57 AM
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It’s hitting me too today, day 7.
Someone pissed me off today and I want the bottle of champagne I know is in the house somewhere.
I laid down for a nap (early sobriety is exhausting), now I’m going with my fiancé to look at lizards at the pet store. AA at 8pm.
You can do this!
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Old 12-30-2017, 11:16 AM
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Hey , Lpg I am also struggling these last few days. I am going to go wash my truck just to get my mind off things. Keeping busy helps me keep my mind clearer.
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Old 12-30-2017, 11:17 AM
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Hi, Lpg. The AV can be torturous, but stand strong and don't let the monster have its way. If you drink you may get a moment's release but that will be swiftly followed by pain, guilt and remorse. Play the tape all the way through and keep fighting. You can win this battle; I wish you much peace, strength, a sober end of the year and continued sobriety in the new one.
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Old 12-30-2017, 11:59 AM
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Stay strong. I'm back on day 1 and its awful. I woke the beast and I'm going to have to deal with that for some time now. If you want a wee reminder of the hangover then here goes. I have:

Dry and horrible mouth.
Bloated fat stomach.
An appetite that craves everything junk related.
A stinking headache
A lethargy that means I can't even be bothered getting dressed.

I hope that helps! Gabe x
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Old 12-30-2017, 01:09 PM
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I find flavored sparkling water... Even the cheap stuff in a nice big glass with ice.. with a slice of fruit, helps immensely when I crave a drink. It gets me through these rough moments...
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Old 12-31-2017, 01:39 AM
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So glad I didn't drink yesterday. Came home and read a book in bed instead. Feeling much calmer today. Iv been very lazy over the festive time no meetings for two weeks the sooner I go back the better just not sure if meetings are running as normal over this time.

I hate this thing so much it really is hard work but I'll stick at it the good times far outweigh the bad but it's so easy for the mind to really go off on one and really forget everything Uv learned. Well for me anyway that took no time at all yesterday to go from I won't drink to I want to drink. Really tortures the head.
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Old 12-31-2017, 02:53 AM
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You got through it though! That shows that you can and you should be proud of that. You'd be feeling awful now if you had given in but you were strong. Well done ^_^
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Old 12-31-2017, 03:00 AM
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Originally Posted by scaredikklegoth View Post
You got through it though! That shows that you can and you should be proud of that. You'd be feeling awful now if you had given in but you were strong. Well done ^_^
Thanks scared, I was extremely close to caving but somehow made it through. Going to reward myself with some retail therapy today I never treat myself and iv saved our household a fortune with my drinking antics.
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Old 12-31-2017, 03:53 AM
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Really glad you got though lpg

D
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Old 12-31-2017, 08:35 AM
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Meetings in my area are 24/7 over this holiday (most holidays) - just drop in at any time...this is at AA clubhouse meetings, dedicated locations.
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