cruiser1911

I just joined and am dealing with drinking issues i have drank for years and I was continually increasing how much I was drinking. I was drinking a pint of 100 proof a night 7 nights a week And my wife was starting to get tired of it I tried aa and stuff like that but kept giving in and didn't have time off work for all the meetings. I went to a doc 5 weeks ago he gave me a prescription for antabuse and its working of me. I haven't had a drink for 5 weeks. The urge comes and goes but most mornings Im upbeat so I take my pill. the first week was awesome,I accomplished a lot of stuff that I was needing to get done. every week since has gotten worse, problem is the brain fog is not getting any better and the exhaustion is always there Im sleeping 8-10 hours a night. my doc is not an addiction doc (can't afford one of those self pay)but all my blood tests are coming back good, blood pressure in range, but Im foggy and thought processes are scrambled, is that normal for someone in the beginnings of trying to dry out? and when does it pass? need advice thanks for any help

MindfulMan

Duration and severity of withdrawal varies from person to person, depending on the individual as well as the amount and duration you've been drinking. There is acute withdrawal and more long-term.

It's hard to say for sure "how long." But it does get better and better. I started
better at 8 weeks and feeling a lot better at 90 days.

Keep it up. It gets much easier.

What is your sobriety plan? Taking antabuse and not drinking isn't enough.

SoberLeigh

Welcome on five weeks, cruiser, and congrats on five weeks of sobriety.

The brain fog and exhaustion will vastly improve, and eventually dissipate. The time for that to happen varies from individual to individual. Be patient and believe.

I found that being grateful for sobriety and truly cherishing every sober moment helped me a great deal.

Again welcome to SR and an exponentially better way to live.

cruiser1911

mindfulman that I know and Im not sure were to go from here I started drinking from boredom, and to self medicate pain, and then it got fun. right now Im not having issues (lost a bunch of weight) but I know they will all be back, and that is scaring me. I need something to fill that hole and Im not finding it. my mood with my kids is sporadic and confuses them. I have been going to a faith based program at my church and its hard to really get into it because I feel like Im trying to quit drinking because my head says I have to but my heart is not there yet. My dad when he was a young man asked my grandpa why he drank everyday he said "because I like it" he died of liver failure as an old man years later. so I dont have a plan right now besides knowing if I drink I puke my guts out, thats why Im coming here.

ScottFromWI

Welcome Cruiser. I tried to fill that "hole" with alcohlol too, but eventually it just washed it out and made it bigger in a sense.

I can tell you that it's not only possible to fill that hole with other things, but to do so permanently and securely. You can even start piling stuff up on the top of the filled in hole and learn new ways to enjoy life without alcohol.

I'd recommend doing some reading here about not only the struggles we face, but also the success stories. I drank for the better part of 3 decades, daily for the last couple. I could simply not fathom how I would do anything without alcohol - but now I see that it was really holding me back instead.

Hope you can stick around!

Hevyn

Congrats on your 5 weeks sober, Cruiser. I was still foggy & exhausted until around 2 months. We've beaten ourselves up badly - need time to recover & heal. It's so good to have you with us.

Dee74

Welcome to SR Cruiser

I think the fogginess is different for just about everyone...I felt a lot better by 3 months, but things got progressively better during that time.

5 weeks is great

D

SteelRes211

Very well stated ScottfromWI.

cruiser1911

had a horrible night last night. up all nite couldn't sleep haven't had one of these that bad in years I wasn't thinking and drank 3 cups of coffee and some d vitamins before bed. did all my normal things to go to sleep. finally got up and read a lot on here. some of the stories are awful and glorious at the same time.
questions I dont know how to ask this with out sounding like an ass
I'm not at that place in my life. I have never been fired from work, never got a dui, did scare myself twice. that cured me just drank at home. but Im afraid of what its going to cost me long term. Im drinking my extra money away, I dont want to lose my family my wife knew about my drinking before we got married but it had increased we dont fight over it but its started to bug her. I dont want my kids to think its okay to drink. I love them and want to embarrass them sober as they grow up not drunk . Im not making any sense here I know. I cant have 1 drink without drinking to black out I have tried that multiple times. is there some litature and books that some of you can recommend to help me get through this? the fog is a little better today maybe because Im tired.
Can a person get to the point mentally that they can quit. before it costs him everything?
For me today, anyway, its a bit like leaving a girl that you love, have fun with, get along good most of the time with, but know it will never work.
I think Im talking to much, Im rambling.
38 days today found my start date november 5

DreamCatcher17

Welcome and congrats to 5 weeks!

Everyone is different, for sure!

I am on day 80 and my insomnia will come mostly on Saturday night now, whereas the first week it was almost daily.
The fog was lifted pretty quickly. (I am not sure if the pill has an effect that may have prolonged some of these or not, I am not a doctor, but I would imagine anything artificial will have some sort of effect)
My emotions for the most part have leveled out, I am still female and have hormones that I have to control.

In due time, you will feel so much better. There will still be off and on days, for years to come, you'll just realize and understand them better.

Best of luck to you!

Keep coming back

Dee74

For me a bottom need not be an event - it can be a simple decision not to live our lives that way one second more..

so yeah I think you can definitely opt out of alcoholism before you reach the bottle in a brown paper bag living under a bridge stage.

Sorry about the sleep - I'd maybe nix the nighttime coffees?

D

Hevyn

You're wise to be concerned, cruiser. Most of us go through different phases. I was at the stage you are now once. I knew I didn't ever drink normally, but still felt I was not in as much danger as many. So I continued on playing with it. The result was that I ended up drinking all day - I got 2 dui's - ruined relationships, health issues, many people disappointed in me. All the things I swore I'd never do while drunk - I did them. Hopefully you'll never reach that stage & will save yourself a lot of misery. Congrats on your 38 days.

cruiser1911

thank you all for the help today
It was fun putting our kids to bed not being 3/4s loaded I was able to read them a book without slurring. I have some build projects coming up with my uncles that are going to be tough usually those Saturday projects mean a couple of 24 packs and a 5th of bourbon and a pile of work done. also curious what ice fishing and snowmobiling is like sober never tried that right now the antabuse is just crutch that I can lean on and make it through these days when I have a weak moment but I dont want that to be the way of life for me I want to be sober and enjoy it Im sure I will eventually. I was in a wreck years ago in a little gambling town in Nevada and was stuck there overnight while waiting for a ride back home.the guy I was working with snored like a chainsaw mating with a grizzly bear so I went down to the casino and played slots most of the night I lost 40 dollars and remember thinking that was stupid I could have drank that and had more fun, but the person in the next machine over that their addiction. I didn't get it then, but I do now. Thanks for all the help and advice

Stayingsassy

I believe if Antabuse gets you through the first part of it then it is worth it....but I don’t believe that Antabuse helps heal your brain from addiction. It’s as if the beast is alive and raging, but in a cage.

On Antabuse I always felt as if I had forced myself into sobriety, when I quit without it and worked on my thought patterns, I felt like I had chosen sobriety.

Again, will never knock any reasonably healthy method that gets an alcoholic out of the alcoholic prison. Staying out, however, can be another ballgame entirely.

cruiser1911

I had a good weekend and they fog is getting better and the insomnia worse. but I need something more than what Im doing. I can already see this is not a long term solution. I had family come over and an uncle brought a bottle I have drank with him for years. we have built shops, decks, one cabin, and even a small creek bridge all this on weekends half lit. he is a full blown functioning drinker he limits it 5 beers a night and a hard alcohol drunk on saturday. I can't control it that well. I told him I couldnt drink, that it would react with my medicine. he didn't push at all but I know I would have given in because just one will not hurt right . I need something deeper and stronger. my wife, and her family also socially drink and we get together every week. Im surrounded by it and it seems unfair that just because I have a problem they can't drink around me, so I haven't dried up the house. Just getting my thoughts out, while dealing with insomnia thanks for listening.

ScottFromWI

Good job on making it through the weekend. It is definitely harder when we are around others that are drinking but I think you handled it well. Have you considered seeking out a recovery group locally or perhaps doing some self help related work? Both of those could certainly get you a deeper/stronger connection to being sober. Spending time here on SR can too - you could join one of the monthly threads in newcomers as a suggestion.

cruiser1911

what did you mean by self help related work? that sounds like something I would do. I have tried the local groups and my work hours make it incredibly hit or miss. I have been reading a lot on here thats helping. I hadn't seen the newcomer section will head over there

SickInLove

Cruiser I can definitely relate to your story. I too have a family that loves to drink socially. Family get together are always filled with bottles of wine, ice boxes or beers. I’m only on day 5 of sobriety (I’ve relapsed a few times) and I know the holidays are going to be especially rough for me with all of the alcohol around. My family doesn’t know about my drinking problem. As a mother I of small kids I’m to embarrassed to admit it to anyone. I’m pretty much on my own with this, which is why I love this forum. I put my kids to bed last night without being buzzed also! It was a great feeling to be completely present with them.I don’t have any advice because it’s all new to me as well but hang in there!

fini

cruiser, way to go on five weeks and grappling with your thoughts and everything that's coming up for you.
yes! yes, you can get and stay sober before you loose everything. and i totally understand how you want to embarrass yourself in front of your kids sober

and yes, fogginess and such is "normal"; you may find this link useful.

https://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/3836936-post1.html ("stages" of recovery)

i also found the challenge to be, ultimately, about finding/building a deeper way of living, and have confidence you can find a way forward that can do that for you.

theVman31

Hello Cruiser.
First of all well done for coming here. I mean really well done I konow it wasnt easy. It was a fantastic move. You have to rember we all have our problems here.
If you want this you have to want it more than anything you wanted anytime in your life. Its the most beautiful yet the most complicated gift, sobriety.
Your journey will be an adventure but your going in the right direction.
Thats a good start isnt it ?
Take care. And keep posting.
Really keep posting !!