Day 1 here
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2015
Location: Auckland
Posts: 22
Day 1 here
Gave up drinking a year or so ago for a couple of months, but then thought I had it under control, so decided I could drink again in moderation, well yeah got back to where I started 
I now know I need to give up for good, its ruining my relationship with my wife if it hasn't already.
I think I really need to identify what my triggers are, anyone have advice on how to do that?
Cheers
Craig
I now know I need to give up for good, its ruining my relationship with my wife if it hasn't already.
I think I really need to identify what my triggers are, anyone have advice on how to do that?
Cheers
Craig
Administrator
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,355
HI Craig - welcome
I actually think the foremost step for anyone is to not drink
It sounds simple and it is - not always easy though - but you'll find support here. Read around a little see what others are doing to stay sober
I think that by not drinking you'll find that after a few weeks you'll have a much better idea of where you are, who you are and what the factors are in your addiction.
I also thought I needed to work out my triggers before I could quit too - all that did was give me leeway to drink some more, and get farther and farther away from clarity.
D
I actually think the foremost step for anyone is to not drink
It sounds simple and it is - not always easy though - but you'll find support here. Read around a little see what others are doing to stay sober
I think that by not drinking you'll find that after a few weeks you'll have a much better idea of where you are, who you are and what the factors are in your addiction.
I also thought I needed to work out my triggers before I could quit too - all that did was give me leeway to drink some more, and get farther and farther away from clarity.
D
Member
Join Date: Feb 2010
Location: UK
Posts: 732
The thing that makes me want to drink the most, without doubt, is being very upset. That's because I've numbed any upset for decades and I can't handle feelings very well - this is what I work on the most in my support group.
However, triggers - um everything I think! I can think of alcohol and a reason to drink it any time or place.
As dee says, when you stop it's easier to pick things apart and distract yourself etc. A big thing for me is filling up with food and cups of tea - I force myself and it takes 90% of the craving away.
You will never be able to remove triggers because you can't control most of what might happen around you.
However, triggers - um everything I think! I can think of alcohol and a reason to drink it any time or place.
As dee says, when you stop it's easier to pick things apart and distract yourself etc. A big thing for me is filling up with food and cups of tea - I force myself and it takes 90% of the craving away.
You will never be able to remove triggers because you can't control most of what might happen around you.
Member
Join Date: Sep 2015
Posts: 3,163
For most of us its about lack of control on some meta physical level. Dodd has done some great work on this.
But the key for me to stop regardless of cravings was the total and complete emotional acceptance that I was addicted to alcohol. Once I accepted that I knew I could never drink again. So I didn't.
But getting there was a journey. And afterwards if I ever really flashed a desire to drink, a real craving, it was always around feeling out of control at work or with my kids, my Ex. Whatever.
You will do this, if you can accept that you are addicted and realise that for addicts, its poison. Drink cyanide, not this girl.
Sounds easy, know its not, but you can do hard things, we all can. nothing is harder than active alcoholism.
As for whether its worth it, there is a great recent post you should check out called "Two Years - The Gains Are So Much Greater" -- she nails it.
But the key for me to stop regardless of cravings was the total and complete emotional acceptance that I was addicted to alcohol. Once I accepted that I knew I could never drink again. So I didn't.
But getting there was a journey. And afterwards if I ever really flashed a desire to drink, a real craving, it was always around feeling out of control at work or with my kids, my Ex. Whatever.
You will do this, if you can accept that you are addicted and realise that for addicts, its poison. Drink cyanide, not this girl.
Sounds easy, know its not, but you can do hard things, we all can. nothing is harder than active alcoholism.
As for whether its worth it, there is a great recent post you should check out called "Two Years - The Gains Are So Much Greater" -- she nails it.
Soberado
Join Date: May 2017
Location: Cleveland Ohio-ish
Posts: 395
Originally Posted by Dropsie 
For most of us its about lack of control on some meta physical level. Dodd has done some great work on this.
But the key for me to stop regardless of cravings was the total and complete emotional acceptance that I was addicted to alcohol. Once I accepted that I knew I could never drink again. So I didn't.
But getting there was a journey. And afterwards if I ever really flashed a desire to drink, a real craving, it was always around feeling out of control at work or with my kids, my Ex. Whatever.
You will do this, if you can accept that you are addicted and realise that for addicts, its poison. Drink cyanide, not this girl.
Sounds easy, know its not, but you can do hard things, we all can. nothing is harder than active alcoholism.
As for whether its worth it, there is a great recent post you should check out called "Two Years - The Gains Are So Much Greater" -- she nails it.
But the key for me to stop regardless of cravings was the total and complete emotional acceptance that I was addicted to alcohol. Once I accepted that I knew I could never drink again. So I didn't.
But getting there was a journey. And afterwards if I ever really flashed a desire to drink, a real craving, it was always around feeling out of control at work or with my kids, my Ex. Whatever.
You will do this, if you can accept that you are addicted and realise that for addicts, its poison. Drink cyanide, not this girl.
Sounds easy, know its not, but you can do hard things, we all can. nothing is harder than active alcoholism.
As for whether its worth it, there is a great recent post you should check out called "Two Years - The Gains Are So Much Greater" -- she nails it.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2015
Location: Auckland
Posts: 22
Hi all, thanks for the comments above, just over half way through Day 3 and still all good, my resolve to not drink again is still strong, but I have been here before and I am sure there will be harder days down the track to come, getting my coping strategies in place is definitely a priority for when that voice in my head says "just one drink wont hurt"
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