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Resentful

Old 11-15-2017, 12:12 AM
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Lpg
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Resentful

Morning everyone. How's it going? I have the worst migraine, sore eyes and hot sweats think my body is still recovering my my last bender 4 days ago.

I'm really struggling to stay in a good mood and interacting with people I feel like I want to hide away. I haven't spoken to any of my friends or family. I'm feeling a bit resentful of everyone being happy and that's not like me at all. I know this feeling won't last and I'm just being miserable.

I've not told any of my friends I need to give up drinking yet, has anyone here told friends yet?
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Old 11-15-2017, 05:39 AM
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i didnt really tell anyone. the main reason is i didnt want to be held accountable. I didnt want to give anyone that kinda power over me. I still feel good about that choice too but It can be beneficial if others are holding you accountable. I also didnt want to advertise it or make it out like there was some sort of problem because at the tiem I felt there was not a problem.

Lifes got its ups and downs dont be resentful it'll just breed more bad vibes for you and i doubt you wanna feel bad hence the post.

But theres not harm in hiding away taking some time for yourself keeping to yourself do what you gotta do to get better. Yes I said better. If your in some sort of a mental funk to me thats just the same as a sickness. sometimes its good we avoid others when we are like that so we dont spread our depression and so on around and be downers. At the same time its important to reach out at least a little cause we do need support from others. Just have to find the right ballance maybe.

But theres no shame in keeping to yourself some as you recover.
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Old 11-15-2017, 10:12 AM
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I did not announce it. Sure people noticed it, but we did not get in long discussion about it. People seemed to not really care in my case. They did not give me grief. I do not give them grief about still drinking.
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Old 11-15-2017, 10:17 AM
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Every time I tried to quit before, I didn't tell anyone because I didn't want to be prevented from drinking when I inevitably went back to it. This time I have told all the important people in my life as well as some friends that I only see at parties occasionally because I want to be held accountable to prevent me from failing.
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Old 11-15-2017, 10:21 AM
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I did not announce it to anyone publicly either. I told my wife and my parents, that was about it. I have no problem telling people that I don't drink if they ask me if I want a drink, but usually "no thank you" is all I need to say.

Regarding this statement:

"I'm feeling a bit resentful of everyone being happy and that's not like me at all. I know this feeling won't last and I'm just being miserable. "

First off, good job on realizing that this wont' last forever. We all have bad days and they do pass fortunately. Second off though - it's dangerous for your own well being to assume that "everone else is happy". Everyone else has bad days too, even those who aren't alcoholics, right?
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Old 11-15-2017, 11:24 AM
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People without a drinking problem really don't understand, and announcing it to the world usually does more harm than good.
Get yourself sober, be it AA, and addiction therapist, or otherwise.
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Old 11-15-2017, 12:48 PM
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Thanks everyone for the replies. some amazing points in there and support.
I spent the day thinking over things and I feel in so much more a positive attitude.

I think I'm going to keep it private and only let family know. I sounded out vibes today about going to the Xmas party with work and not drinking, let's just say that didn't go down well. Possibly staying home and taking care of myself is best as I don't need alcohol flaunted in my face right now.

Thanks everyone for replys
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Old 11-15-2017, 02:31 PM
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Originally Posted by Lpg View Post
I've not told any of my friends I need to give up drinking yet...
There are usually two reasons we don't tell people we are giving up drinking:

1. None of their business, or
2. If I don't tell them, I can drink and no one is the wiser

Just be sure what your motivation is for keeping your sobriety to yourself.
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Old 11-15-2017, 05:10 PM
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I should add that I don't think telling all and sundry about it is a good idea but the important people in your life knowing can be a big help (it has been for me anyway).

I know that some of the party friends I told were judging me but *shrugs*, maybe they just didn't want to look at their own drinking.

Everyone is different of course. I hope that, whatever you do, you stay strong and have plenty of support in place. You're doing great!
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Old 11-15-2017, 05:38 PM
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I didn't have to announce it. People knew it. I looked different. I acted different. I showed up to work every day to run my business. I became alive again. I got hugs from everyone. Nothing to hide. Little was question. No resentment. Just grateful. I put myself thru 35 years of hell. It was time to join humanity again.
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Old 11-15-2017, 06:25 PM
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Whether you tell friends/family you plan to stop drinking is irrelevant. It's the action you take that matter, only that.
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Old 11-15-2017, 11:33 PM
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Originally Posted by waynetheking View Post
I didn't have to announce it. People knew it. I looked different. I acted different. I showed up to work every day to run my business. I became alive again. I got hugs from everyone. Nothing to hide. Little was question. No resentment. Just grateful. I put myself thru 35 years of hell. It was time to join humanity again.
love this thank you. Very uplifting. Well done on your recovery hope I can say the same I'm months to come.
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Old 11-15-2017, 11:34 PM
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Originally Posted by NYCDoglvr View Post
Whether you tell friends/family you plan to stop drinking is irrelevant. It's the action you take that matter, only that.
true words. Thank you
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Old 11-15-2017, 11:46 PM
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Originally Posted by scaredikklegoth View Post
I should add that I don't think telling all and sundry about it is a good idea but the important people in your life knowing can be a big help (it has been for me anyway).

I know that some of the party friends I told were judging me but *shrugs*, maybe they just didn't want to look at their own drinking.

Everyone is different of course. I hope that, whatever you do, you stay strong and have plenty of support in place. You're doing great!
I think I'm only going to tell my family and my best friend (singular) I've realised that most of my other friends are only party friends and apart from that I'm quite a loner lol. Which is something I've only just realised. I think part of my plan is to maybe attend a group thing for a hobby as I don't have any hobbys (partying was my hobby)

It's amazing how much this time I'm really realising it's not just stopping drinking that has to change, my lifestyle has to aswell. I need more out of life and try some enjoyable hobbys and quit being a loner.
Thanks for your reply hope your doing good.
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