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Breakthrough

Old 11-13-2017, 07:21 PM
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Fall down 7 times, stand up 8
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Breakthrough

Well my day was mixed. I would not say it was a good day and I was happy but I feel - accomplished. I have been to some AA meetings and know the serenity prayer, Grant me the serenity to accept what I can't change, the courage to change what I can, and the wisdom to know the difference. That became real to me today. One of my coworkers is a one upper, backstabber and know it all. She butts into everyone's business. Today someone came to me for information. Before I could open my mouth, she told them she had the information and so they went to her for help. Normally I would fume the rest of the day, how dare she act like that, undermining me. By the end of the day I would be totally wound up and would stop at the liquor store for something to de-escalate. But then it dawned on me that no amount of fuming I did was going to change her behavior. But my fuming would take my focus OFF of what I could change, my reaction i.e. drinking. So after she helped the person I politely thanked her for the help and LET IT GO and moved on. At the end of the day, I was not wound up and I could focus on what I could change - NOT DRINK. I went to my doctor's appointment and then straight home bypassing the liquor store. Feeling calm and even a little proud of myself. On another note, my doctor ordered another x-ray and will be referring me to an orthopedic surgeon. Possible surgery on my hand is scary, my hands are my livelihood. But I can't control it, drinking will not change what happens with my hand. But I can face it clear headed. Only one day and I don't know if I will have the same resolve tomorrow but I will face that tomorrow.
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Old 11-13-2017, 08:07 PM
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Sounds like you handled things well, TOTP.
Good for you.
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Old 11-14-2017, 10:07 AM
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Tired,
Great story - that’s the power of acceptance! I have been noticing the same thing in the last few months: Over the course of the day, there are always things that annoy you, what really counts is how you react. You can either engage in bitter, fruitless battles or you can just let it go.
Standing up for principles, yes, but fighting the self-serving petty battles of your ego, nope, I’m done with that!
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Old 11-14-2017, 02:07 PM
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Sounds like you are starting to think before you react.

It took me decades to realize the things you posted; I was just too stubborn to give up my need to control everything and got pissed off and/or drunk if I didn't get my way - and it is still a work in progress.
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