Notices

I'm back and hoping it's different this time

Old 11-13-2017, 03:29 PM
  # 21 (permalink)  
Member
Thread Starter
 
scaredikklegoth's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2015
Location: UK
Posts: 323
Originally Posted by corriec View Post
Every day is a new day, Scared. Stick it out and know you're not alone; not with this problem - never...
That's very kind, thank you ^_^

Day 74!
scaredikklegoth is offline  
Old 11-13-2017, 11:04 PM
  # 22 (permalink)  
I am not these thoughts - I am the Master of these thoughts.
 
ForestFrenzy's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2017
Posts: 134
I, too, sense the determination and conviction in you, Scared.
And I am excited for you to welcome your baby into this world as sober and truly alive.
ForestFrenzy is offline  
Old 11-14-2017, 08:44 AM
  # 23 (permalink)  
Member
Thread Starter
 
scaredikklegoth's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2015
Location: UK
Posts: 323
Originally Posted by ForestFrenzy View Post
I, too, sense the determination and conviction in you, Scared.
And I am excited for you to welcome your baby into this world as sober and truly alive.
Thanks Forest! I had another good talk with my mum last night about it and she's being so supportive and saying how proud she is of me and how she thinks I'm gonna be a great mum and that's such positive reinforcement for me. My stepdad is also an alcoholic but hasn't managed to quit yet so my mum knows firsthand how damaging this addiction is and how hard it is to fight.
scaredikklegoth is offline  
Old 11-14-2017, 08:53 AM
  # 24 (permalink)  
Forum Leader
 
ScottFromWI's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2012
Location: Wisconsin, USA
Posts: 16,945
Sounds like you are making some great connections and moving in the right direction. Personal relationships became much more important to me after I quit, and I shied away from them while I was drinking - mainly to avoid conflict and/or my responsibilities. It's not easy but it's a super important part of recovery IMHO, glad to see you making those connections.
ScottFromWI is offline  
Old 11-14-2017, 09:03 AM
  # 25 (permalink)  
Member
Thread Starter
 
scaredikklegoth's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2015
Location: UK
Posts: 323
Originally Posted by ScottFromWI View Post
Sounds like you are making some great connections and moving in the right direction. Personal relationships became much more important to me after I quit, and I shied away from them while I was drinking - mainly to avoid conflict and/or my responsibilities. It's not easy but it's a super important part of recovery IMHO, glad to see you making those connections.
You're so right on that. I used to tell myself I didn't care about being on my own a lot as I'm a solitary person. Now I'm an introvert but I was using that as an excuse to stay home and drink alone. I'd sit there with my headphones on, either watching the same show over again or listening to music and ignoring the world around me. I'd even resent when my partner would speak to me because I was busy getting drunk!

It's a terrible thing, this addiction. I never ever want to be that way again.
scaredikklegoth is offline  
Old 11-14-2017, 12:39 PM
  # 26 (permalink)  
Member
Thread Starter
 
scaredikklegoth's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2015
Location: UK
Posts: 323
I had a lovely swim. Must've done 40 lengths! Now I'm going to have a jacket tato and crawl into bed as I have volunteering tomorrow morning. I did a healthy thing again! I like being sober ^_^
scaredikklegoth is offline  
Old 11-14-2017, 02:56 PM
  # 27 (permalink)  
Member
 
Ringo123's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2016
Location: California
Posts: 2,722
SLG, AA meetings are for everyone regardless of one's spiritual beliefs. That's the beauty of its inclusiveness--all, whether religious, agnostic, nostic, atheist, or undecided can achieve quality, long lasting sobriety through Recovery, Service and Unity.

Welcome to your new life!
Ringo123 is offline  
Old 11-15-2017, 09:01 AM
  # 28 (permalink)  
Member
Thread Starter
 
scaredikklegoth's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2015
Location: UK
Posts: 323
Originally Posted by Ringo123 View Post
SLG, AA meetings are for everyone regardless of one's spiritual beliefs. That's the beauty of its inclusiveness--all, whether religious, agnostic, nostic, atheist, or undecided can achieve quality, long lasting sobriety through Recovery, Service and Unity.

Welcome to your new life!
Thanks Ringo. I think I will try attending a meeting as I have nothing to lose and much to gain. There are a few in my town so I can always try another if the first one I go to doesn't fit

I didn't go to my volunteering today as I was still awake at gone 6am despite swimming 40 lengths and being exhausted. I think it's pregnancy stuff keeping me awake which unfortunately can't be helped. I'll try again next week.
scaredikklegoth is offline  
Old 11-15-2017, 02:40 PM
  # 29 (permalink)  
Member
 
Ringo123's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2016
Location: California
Posts: 2,722
That's right, if a particular group doesn't sit well with you, try another! And maybe later go back to the first one to see if maybe they just had a off night.

In any case, keep taking good care of yourself--and your baby (smile).
Ringo123 is offline  
Old 11-15-2017, 05:07 PM
  # 30 (permalink)  
Member
Thread Starter
 
scaredikklegoth's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2015
Location: UK
Posts: 323
Originally Posted by Ringo123 View Post
That's right, if a particular group doesn't sit well with you, try another! And maybe later go back to the first one to see if maybe they just had a off night.

In any case, keep taking good care of yourself--and your baby (smile).
Thank you, I will! ^_^

My laptop has officially died. A friend who works in IT got it working earlier but it didn't last. This means I cannot write (I'm working on a few projects and I need to be able to type, not write longhand) and it's driving me crazy. Writing is such a huge outlet for me and drinking always made it harder, like it suppressed my creativity (perhaps it did). Now I've been sober for 77 days (it's after midnight here), the urge is coming back and my brain is buzzing with ideas but I can't get them down! I think a keyboard for my tablet is a necessity so writing can be my drug again (but in a good way! )

If it turns out that drinking was ruining my writing then I'll be so happy to get going again and it will be yet another joy of being sober.
scaredikklegoth is offline  
Old 11-15-2017, 05:45 PM
  # 31 (permalink)  
ours de petit cerveau
 
andyh's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2017
Location: London, UK
Posts: 1,630
old-school suggestion maybe, but ... pen & paper til your laptop gets fixed?
andyh is offline  
Old 11-15-2017, 06:01 PM
  # 32 (permalink)  
Member
Thread Starter
 
scaredikklegoth's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2015
Location: UK
Posts: 323
Originally Posted by andyh View Post
old-school suggestion maybe, but ... pen & paper til your laptop gets fixed?
Heh, I did think about it but the project I'm working on needs editing before I continue but I can't access it. It's such a pain! I'm going to have to use a hard drive cradle to extract it then upload it to my tablet.
scaredikklegoth is offline  
Old 11-15-2017, 07:20 PM
  # 33 (permalink)  
I am not these thoughts - I am the Master of these thoughts.
 
ForestFrenzy's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2017
Posts: 134
You are a light Goth - shine, shine, let it shine.
ForestFrenzy is offline  
Old 11-16-2017, 12:34 AM
  # 34 (permalink)  
Member
Thread Starter
 
scaredikklegoth's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2015
Location: UK
Posts: 323
Originally Posted by ForestFrenzy View Post
You are a light Goth - shine, shine, let it shine.
Tehe! ^_^
scaredikklegoth is offline  
Old 11-16-2017, 06:54 AM
  # 35 (permalink)  
Member
 
Ringo123's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2016
Location: California
Posts: 2,722
Goth, I understand how you need a device for projects. I only use good old fashioned writing for my journaling--so therapeutic.

If a sponsee says her writing is awful and wants to typing to be her mainstay (for step homework), I share with her the benefits of getting it out on paper--the messier, the better! Even if she tears the paper; good, I say.

Continue to take good care of yourself--You are worth it!
Ringo123 is offline  
Old 11-17-2017, 09:24 AM
  # 36 (permalink)  
Member
Thread Starter
 
scaredikklegoth's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2015
Location: UK
Posts: 323
Originally Posted by Ringo123 View Post
Goth, I understand how you need a device for projects. I only use good old fashioned writing for my journaling--so therapeutic.

If a sponsee says her writing is awful and wants to typing to be her mainstay (for step homework), I share with her the benefits of getting it out on paper--the messier, the better! Even if she tears the paper; good, I say.

Continue to take good care of yourself--You are worth it!
Thanks Ringo!

I feel rough today. I have a cold and my morning sickness has popped up again so struggling to do anything but feel a bit sorry for myself. Just feeling a bit grumpy.
scaredikklegoth is offline  
Old 11-19-2017, 07:26 PM
  # 37 (permalink)  
Member
Thread Starter
 
scaredikklegoth's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2015
Location: UK
Posts: 323
I have a party on Saturday where everyone except myself and my partner will be drinking. Thankfully, a few of the guests already know that I'm on the wagon for good and I know I won't give in to temptation while I'm pregnant. Afterwards it will get harder but I hope to have a relationship meeting I attend and therapist that I see to head that off at the pass.
scaredikklegoth is offline  
Old 11-21-2017, 09:14 AM
  # 38 (permalink)  
Member
Thread Starter
 
scaredikklegoth's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2015
Location: UK
Posts: 323
Off swimming this evening. I've been sleeping really badly but I want to go so I'm going to power through and go, even if I mostly just float around and daydream.

82 days sober!
scaredikklegoth is offline  
Old 11-21-2017, 09:38 AM
  # 39 (permalink)  
ours de petit cerveau
 
andyh's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2017
Location: London, UK
Posts: 1,630
have fun & well done on 82 days

have you tried a SMART online meeting yet? they're very friendly & you don't have to say/type anything if you don't want to the first few times
andyh is offline  
Old 11-21-2017, 09:47 AM
  # 40 (permalink)  
Member
Thread Starter
 
scaredikklegoth's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2015
Location: UK
Posts: 323
Originally Posted by andyh View Post
have fun & well done on 82 days

have you tried a SMART online meeting yet? they're very friendly & you don't have to say/type anything if you don't want to the first few times
No I haven't been able to get on there as my partner's laptop has died too! I tried downloading that software on my phone but that didn't work either

I think I'm going to have to give up on the idea until I get a new laptop (which will be a loooooong time as got a house move and baby to pay for first) and find a local AA meeting instead.
scaredikklegoth is offline  

Currently Active Users Viewing this Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
 
Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are Off




All times are GMT -7. The time now is 05:39 PM.