iew101

Hello,

One of the reasons I quit drinking was anger outbursts while drunk. Usually verbal but a few instances of physical altercations (long time ago). I seemed to "fly off at the mouth" while drunk and for a week-ish after a binge.

I'm now 3 months sober and seem to be having similar, obviously not as bad as when I was wasted, issues with anger. Snapping easily, seeming to assume comments are always coming from a mean place and just a lot of fighting with my wife. I assumed that the longer I was sober the better my anger management would get. I seem to be trending downward lately.

We do have a 6 month old so I was expecting some added stress/fighting but it seems like it's more than normal. I'm just trying to figure out if I'm the main cause or if I'm somewhat depressed etc. I am seeing a therapist for OCD so I can address this as well. Curious if others have gone thru similar situations.

ScottFromWI

Glad to hear that you are seeing a therapist Iew - if you have not mentioned this I would definitely do so as soon as you can.

As with most psychological issues, there are usually a multitude of reasons behind them. So it's probably a combination of stress, quitting drinking, and underlying issues. The good thing is that you recognize it and are seeking a solution.

Stayingsassy

I had anger issues when drinking. Af 2 weeks sober I'm still not sure if it was drinking related, or it was me. I feel calmer and I notice my husband spending more time talking to me and hanging out with me, so I'm hopeful it was mostly drunken belligerence. I'm sure I have issues though.

Have you tried thought-stopping? An awareness of thoughts coming in. Drinking, I didn't have the ability to check in with myself, I just popped off, now when I notice resentment building i try to stop and ask myself...."ok, wait a minute before you start accusing. Where is this coming from? Is this valid? Does this require an open discussion, or is this better kept to myself?"

One of the greatest gifts of sobriety: the chance to check our emotions before acting on them. I love this part. This part was actually most of the reason I quit.

NYCDoglvr

The most common issue people have in recovery is anger. We work on it with the steps and helping others. It's a process and there are no quick fixes.

Bunny211

Yup. Was never angry (that I knew of) until I quit drinking. Now I realize I drank to mellow out. I've been absolutely furious for most of my 2.5 years of recovery despite working the steps, going to meetings, doing service work etc. I am working with a therapist and trying to get more physical exercise to combat the intense rage I feel most days.

SteelRes211

Oh ya big time anger even after seven months especially while driving and I drive a lot because of my job. I never had a anger issue, I could usually take a ton of BS before I would unravel on someone. But now my anger flares up out of no where, generally over stupid things like slow people at the gas station trying to pick out stupid instant scratch off lottery tickets at the sales counter while a line is forming behind them. This summer I blew up bad while at Cedar Point because this innocent college kid was following the rules by refusing to re-fill my $11.00 drink all day soda pop not a minute before the never mentioned 20 minute wait between refill rule. My brother looked over at me with a "what the heck just happened" look on his face while I tossed out every nasty word I could throw out there... I walked away and felt like an ass the rest of the day. So yes it happens but it does diminish over time thank God.

Stronger2017

I get angry sometimes. It’s something I really want to fix.