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Tapering advice

Old 10-09-2017, 08:23 AM
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Tapering advice

Hello. I am a new member but have browsed this forum several time. I have been drinking heavily for many years (15). At least a fifth of vodka a day on most day for the last year. Some times less, some times more. The last few days I have been cutting back a little...even more yesterday. I started drinking in the mornings and during the day about a year ago to keep the anxious feelings away. I have anxiety attacks. I bet sometimes they are withdrawals AND anxiety. I work from home which doesn't help! I have a business trip next week and I obviously can't bring my bottle of vodka with me to the all day meetings. I will not be tapering to zero for this trip but I need to get it under control. I do have .25 Xanax to use as needed and they do help. Here is how I am approaching my taper. I am going to wait until I NEED that drink before I have one. For example, I had my last drink at 9:30 last night. I didn't sleep great. Sweats started at 2 but I did not have a drink or a pill. It is now 11:15am and I have not had a pull. I will see how long I can go and then only drink what I need to. I hope that if that is 2pm today....tomorrow it is 3pm etc. Has anyone tried this approach?

And my liver enzymes are bad so I am also trying to avoid the Xanax. I was taking it daily and my enzymes are 176 and 221.

Yes I have a doctor and he is aware and supportive but we didn't talk about tapering. He also gave me a sleeping pill that is safe with alcohol and non habit forming. He advised me to increase that if needed as my insomnia will get worse before it gets better as I cut my drinking.

And so you know a little bit more about me.....I am 47 and I am married to an alcoholic (worse than me with deteriorating health issues), a very difficult son that has made my life hell (love him!) so my "excuse" for drinking is stress, a commission based job, anxiety and insomnia. Plus to be honest, I love the social aspect of it.

And I am the healthiest unhealthy person around. I eat very clean, gluten free and vegan. I exercise often but not as much as before because I get too anxious at the gym in the morning. I drink decaf herbal tea and about a gallon of water a day. I had my labs done recently and they are perfect except for the liver enzymes and high iron (caused by the liver likely). I do smoke too but 1/2 pack a day on most days. My friends laugh at my diet because of my drinking and smoking.

Thank you in advance. I look forward to your comments without judgement.

Last edited by tko48326; 10-09-2017 at 08:33 AM. Reason: More information
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Old 10-09-2017, 09:22 AM
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Welcome to SR tko48326. Tapering is one of the most oft-disscussed/asked about topics here on SR. The general consensus is that it's extremely difficult, and for most it does not work well as it represents a form of "control" of our drinking. And for most of us, the reason we are here is that we don't have control over our drinking.

I'd highly recommend that you also discuss tapering with your doctor. Taking Benzo's ( Xanax ) while drinking alcohol can be an extremely dangerous combination. I'd let him know that you still plan on drinking some and see what he recommends.

I'm glad to hear that you've decided to quit - that's a big step for anyone to take. I hope you can make SR part of your journey.
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Old 10-09-2017, 09:51 AM
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Hi tko, and welcome. I don't post here often anymore but your post got my attention. I was filled with anxiety just reading about your struggles to taper off your alcohol usage. It's been close to 3 years since I last tried that and I still remember how miserable and half-crazy it made me. I did manage to make it "work" once, but I celebrated by having extra drinks. It never worked again, and was unsustainable to begin with. As Scott pointed out, if you weren't addicted to alcohol, this would be a non-issue, but if you are, the inability to manage your drinking on your own is exactly why you are here.

Your drinking habits sound very much like mine were - a 5th/day, give or take - and I was a daily drinker. I tried many different ways to stop, but unfortunately (or fortunately, depending upon how you look at it), I had to lose nearly everything before I stopped trying to figure it all out myself. Becoming an AA member, getting a sponsor, and working the steps has kept me sober these past 2 1/2 years. It was the last thing I ever wanted to try, but the first thing that actually has worked.

Whatever you do to get your drinking problem under control, if you determine that you are addicted and unable to successfully and consistently keep it under control, I urge you to get help with it. Also as Scott pointed out, mixing alcohol and benzos is very dangerous. You should definitely confide in your doctor about everything you are putting into your body, including the alcohol.
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Old 10-09-2017, 09:54 AM
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Hi tko,

I have tapered a number of times but wouldn't presume to tell you what might work for you. I will say I did a one day outpatient detox and that was SO much better. If you are in the US, you might want to call some IOP programs to see what options they have.

Also agree with Scott on contacting your doctor to run your plan past them. Sounds kind of scary, maybe, but I'm sure they've heard it all and I'm positive they want to help.

Welcome!
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Old 10-09-2017, 10:05 AM
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Thank you for the response thus far. I have read all the pros and cons of tapering. The deal is I need a short term fix (not quit) to get through this business trip. I need to be able to make it through the day without a drink. I was hoping had some success (even short term) with the approach I am taking to tapering.

And my doctor is aware of my drinking and says the small amount of Xanax I am taking is ok. I use it to avoid the bottle sometimes vs mixing the two together.
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Old 10-09-2017, 10:20 AM
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I see. Waiting until later in the day each day makes sense to me. If you're not going to stop completely, I'm not sure people here can help much because we're overwhelmingly an all or nothing crowd.

Unsolicited advice: I'd worry about messing up some time before Monday if it were me. ("I feel better, I've got time to rinse & repeat before the conference!") Actually, I wouldn't worry about it at all of it were me - I know for certain that's just what I would do. And then I'd find a way to drink during the day at the conference. I know because that's exactly what I did. And it was horrible.
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Old 10-09-2017, 10:28 AM
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Oh I know. I am the master of airplane bottles! But I would rather get it under control. And I have the time zone working against me. When the meetings start it will already be 10:30am my body clock. And I get to fly first class. So many challenges.
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Old 10-09-2017, 10:50 AM
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Originally Posted by tko48326 View Post
But I would rather get it under control.
That was my goal too, and likely almost all of us. Problem is, there is no "control" available to us - that's why we are here in the first place, right? I bargained with my addiction for years. I tried every possible form of "Moderation" that was known...and even invented some of my own.

My personal solution was that I simply had to take some time off work and quit. Screwing around with tapering/moderating and "fitting recovery into my schedule" always failed for me. Our addiction is a master at giving us excuses as to why today won't work to quit - too busy at work, too much going on at home, too much stress, etc.
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Old 10-09-2017, 11:48 AM
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I tapered. My appraoch was to cut down 1 beer each night till i was down to nothing. at about 5 i just quit cause if i couldnt get **** drunk i felt what was the point. This worked for me.

Now i tried doing things like your suggesting. like i wont drink till i absolutly cant take it rarara yeah i always and a reason why i coudlnt take it so i just drank.

what ever works I guess. But dont do it casue you have a meeting and cant drink or something. do it cause you should quit drinking.

its incredible how irrational we can be. Your vegan you excercise and you smoke and drink? are you insane? I say this with all due respect. Because I am vegan a former smoker and a long distance runner and a recovering alcoholic. I can tell you there your thinking is nuts and i can say this because I can understand. There is a sick twisted part of me that would happily smoke a turd if it had nicotine and drink **** if it had booze in it and throw away all my health and fitness gains in an instant!. This part of me is an addict and a self destructed part of me that wants to do nothing but see me crash and burn.

Sobering up has helped me get a handle on this sick and twisted part of me and get me get a grip on it etc..

I once asked someone who knows my story some what they would think if tommorrow i went out got a pack of smokes and case of beer and bucket of fried chicken. And they replied I'd think your absolutly insane. To loose all that weight fix your health quit yoru vices and then go do something like that.

there right too. It is what it is.

I think you can do it. I guess do what you gotta do to get through these meetings. But I dont haste on getting sober and staying that way. its ultimatly more important then those meetings if i had to guess.
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Old 10-09-2017, 11:49 AM
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I dont think there is really a short term fix theres no Hack for life.

But keeping your doc in the loop and staying safe is a good starting point.
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Old 10-09-2017, 12:23 PM
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The ER doctor that I first saw suggested tapering for me, but I knew I was "all or nothing", so I quit cold turkey. Perhaps not the wisest decision, but it all worked out for me as the withdrawls weren't too bad. Once you do stop for good, I hope you have some sort of plan in place to stay stopped.
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Old 10-09-2017, 12:47 PM
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Good luck TKO,

Sounds like you embrace your drinking. You sound open and honest about it with people around you. I only suggest that you share with someone your plan that will be around you on this trip. Alcohol withdrawals can be deadly. Have an emergency plan with this person in case you have a seizure or go unconscious.

Good luck with tapering, if I could have changed my drinking I probably would still be drinking. Comeback and share your experience with us please. Thank you.
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Old 10-10-2017, 10:09 AM
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I couldn't taper. Not saying no one can. I just found it difficult to keep to the lower amounts.

You're at an advantage in that you already had the discussion with your doctor, so you could just go to him, explain your fears of increased anxiety in withdrawals so he can give you the appropriate meds so you can get through work and the business trip more easily: then just quit.

Guaranteed your drinking is doing as much or more damage to your liver than benzos for 4-7 days, once it's our of your system you'll no longer need them.

Then you won't be missing gym workouts anymore! (Can relate to missing the gym after drinking....)
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Old 10-10-2017, 11:06 AM
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Alcoholics can't taper. If I could have cut back on my drinking I wouldn't call myself an alcoholic.
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Old 10-10-2017, 09:54 PM
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Originally Posted by tko48326 View Post
The deal is I need a short term fix (not quit) to get through this business trip. I need to be able to make it through the day without a drink.
No such thing exists, as much as we wished it did.
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Old 10-11-2017, 02:59 AM
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Firmly against tapering as we can set all the end dates we want and then convince ourselves a future one makes more sense etc. further, I echo what Gottalife said.
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Old 10-11-2017, 04:59 AM
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Hi tko,

It sounds like you're going to try to control your drinking through this business trip, either way. Any plans for when you come back home?
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Old 10-11-2017, 12:12 PM
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Tapering, particularly using benzos, rarely if ever works in an outpatient situation if one is drinking as much as a 5th a day. Xanax is very short acting and somewhat euphoric, so it's rarely used to ease withdrawals. Longer acting benzos are far more common, particularly valium or librium.

I realize that you are under a doctor's care, but I would suggest a doctor is a psychiatrist who specializes with addiction.
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