what happened
 

Hi Everyone,
Been on this site for years never really posted much
I will let everyone know about were i am at.
18 to 20 drank
sober 21 to 25
drank ,got in trouble
sober from 27 to 42
42 to 44 back
45 to today cannot get on track
Went to meetings for years and always heard about the 1 more drunk in me,not sure about the recovery.So True....

e

Hi, gregslo.
Welcome back.
So you are drinking now, but would like to stop?
Okay. Keep posting.
We are here.

Yes, Just went from a Binge drinker to every night for the last 4 1/2 years.Have a hard time now stopping,never under estimate.It never stops drinking or not,powerless.You do not leave of at last point of drinking with that first drink you are beyond that..Always remember powerless over your addiction,1 day or 20 years same thing,same place.

Do you have a sponsor? Working a program? Put down the booze, make a plan and get to work.

Welcome back Greg. I don't think it's ever too late to write a new chapter in our story :)

D

Over the course of the last decade my drinking went from
moderate amounts occasionally to
moderate amounts every evening to
moderate amounts every evening with frequent overdoing to
overdoing it every evening and way overdoing on weekends to
morning drinking continuing throughout the day Every Single Day

I've got 16 days now and the trick for me is to throw everything I have into changing things up. The combination of physical activity, rearranging my living space, eating regularily, reading and posting here, therapy, AA and IOP have pretty much helped me to sail through. I'm certain there are choppy waters ahead, but I am working hard to make sure I have everything I can in place before that storm hits.

We are not powerless over our addictions, we are powerless over what happens when we ingest substances that change us. I believe that I can force my addiction into remission by working as hard at it as I would any other chronic disease.

O

Greg,

I know how frustrating it feels to be starting over, and how mad you are at yourself.

But let it go -- you did it before means you can do it again.

We allll did.

You got this.

Great post Obladi.

Hi Gregslo,
I was certainly powerless over alcohol in every respect. I relate exactly when the big book talks about being powerless over the first drink.

I have also seen the progression you talk about, even in dry spells. Alcoholism seems to progress even when we are not drinking. When guys like me drink, who have been sober a long time, it is like we never stopped, which is why most of us never make it back. A scary thought.

It was important for me to recognize that powerlessness. That was the main reason for me to seek a power greater than myself to solve the problem. Lack of power was my dilemma.

The big book emphasizes this over and over. "The alcoholic at certain times has no effective defense against the first drink. Except in a few rare cases, neither he nor any other human being can provide such a defense. His defense must come from a Higher Power"

Being alcoholic, I thought for a time that I would be one of the rare cases. Don't we love to be different? But no, I am just the standard real alcoholic as described in the book and my defense had to come from a Higher Power. That was what the steps were for, to make the connection, and it worked.

Today I have all the power I need to stay away from the fatal first drink. It is just not my power. Meetings do not bring this about, only action on the steps as a way of life.

I hope you can find a sponsor and get going on those steps. You will find you re only a few steps away from permanent recovery.

Welcome back, Greg. Sobriety can be yours again, but you gotta want it!