BullDog777

I was in my head the whole day. I could have done a ton of stuff, but instead I slept until 2pm because I started obsessing about my health the night before.

I did everything wrong today. I shut myself in, didn't talk to any one and just let myself obsess.

So, I had 4 really good anxiety attacks and just sat in my studio where I am now at 2:00 AM. Head in my hands until I decided to write this.

The only thing I did right was not drink. This is how I feel..


that's all. thanks for listening...I just needed to vent my stupid decisions today.

Dee74

Somedays all we can do is stay sober BD - doesn't have to always be graceful

D

BullDog777

That was AWESOME, and soo true!!! LMAO!! i think that was the first time I laughed all day. Thanks a bunch D. I needed that.

Dee74

no worries man

D

Grungehead

I've found that days like this (while no fun) make me stronger in the long run, having come out the other side still sober.

ScottFromWI

I had days like that too. Getting a handle on my anxiety was really what was needed....you've been working on that, correct?

Dave42001

Sounds like you Won to me!! Don't beat yourself up!! take it one day at a time!

Wishing you the best!! Nice job!

nez

Not true, you did at least two other things right (probably more).
1.)you reached out, by posting here.
2.) you recognized behavior patterns.

Progress my man, not perfection. Cut yourself some slack.

It is wise to keep an eye on regression, but don't forget to acknowledge progression. :~)

airyfairy123

Hi,
Not posted in a long while... agree with what everyone says, sometimes just staying sober is hard enough without tackling all the other stuff.

BullDog777

yeah, I am...but I think there are a few things that are really stressing me out right now that I'm finding hard to deal with.

The first thing is my daughter is starting 6th grade in a week. I always worry about taking her to school and picking her up. What if something happens to me during the day? etc..

I want to move...nobody else does or cares about it.

I guess those are the big things.

Being the father of a teenage daughter is challenging enough...she's strong willed and a little rebellious. My wife says if i go into over protection mode, it'll make things worse. This is a balancing act I fear I'm not ready for.

Every time I talk to my dr. about going back on anti anxiety meds, she's never opposed it, but rather thinks my anxiety is situational. So in one breath she's saying OK, but maybe you don't really need it if the stressor is dealt with.

So basically she's saying...gut up dude...this is normal anxiety. It seems like she's really wanting me to learn how to live life on life's terms.
I don't much like that right now. I feel like if i pushed the subject, she'd put me back on them, but what if she's right?