Analog71

Is there a relapse forum? Didn't see one. If I am posting in the wrong place please let me know.

I relapsed. For just over 3 weeks. The guilt is unreal. I cant really say what happened other than it was a Saturday night and I was bored and I basically woke up 3 weeks later. There was a lot of bad decisions in that 3 week time. Maybe August will bring something better.

Jeez I'm not really sure what I'm trying to say or do here. I just had to tell someone, anyone.

Mummyto2

Hi, we have all been there, keep posting its a great place to be good luck

Andante

How long were you sober before you relapsed? If it was for a period of months or more, then you know what you need to do to get back on the horse. If it was just a few days or so, then you didn't really "relapse" so much as have a brief interruption in your drinking.

For most people, staying sober requires more than just stopping drinking. The first requirement is a deep desire to stay sober MORE than the desire to get drunk -- and doing whatever it takes on an ongoing basis to keep those priorities in that order.

There's no "relapse forum" on SR because, contrary to some popular belief, relapse is a part of addiction, not recovery.

ScottFromWI

Welcome back analog. There is not a forum here specific to "relapse" but we are all familiar with returning to the bottle after a period of not drinking.

How about instead of waiting for august to "maybe be better" you could make a plan to ensure that it's better? There's plenty of support and information on how to do so here.

RecklessEric

Your story rings lots of bells, Analog.

That horrible feeling will pass if you stay sober and take good care of yourself.
This is the best place for support, I find.

shauninspain

I know exactly how you feel as I relapsed so many times there were occasions when I thought I was attempting a world record. Like you the guilt and shame of what I did in blackout was crushing. However, you are here now and just posting is a sign of progress. Fortunately, the negative emotions that you are experiencing will fade, but try to remember them sufficiently enough so that you can recall them before picking up a drink. All the best.

NulaMeansZero

fight fire with fire...

realize how much sobriety means too you and fight back..

you made a decision to drink, your not happy with outcome, fight back..

You are a amazing person, you have a amazing opportunity here to never feel horrible or lose track of anything ever again, you need to guard your sobriety this time around as you (and I, and every other person that relapses time and time again) that drinking is not for any of us.

Respect your body and you will be rewarded!!

Dee74

Great advice here Analog

I just finished someone else that success at this stage depends on effort - so do everything you can to stay sober - go to meetings (AA SMART LIfeRing etc), post here regularly - do whatever it takes.

You'll get back what you put in

D

SoberCAH

We're very glad you are here and seeking sobriety.

Please keep us posted with your efforts.

We all hope you never drink again, at least not today, and that you stick around

waynetheking

Glad your back. Now go to work on your sobriety. Get a plan and work it. Relapse sucks. Avoid this time.

DayTrader

I know the feeling all too well. Eventually I figured out though, that the guilt FOR ME was present mostly because I was 100% convinced I could or should have done better.

As an AA guy, eventually I took the first step - a step where I finally admitted that on my own power, I would continue to drink....and kill myself in the process or just flat out kill myself the old-fashioned way. Worse yet, maybe I'd just continue to live and it would just keep getting worse and worse and worse. I had to do like someone who's crippled in a car accident and then confined to a wheelchair - admit my limitations. It would be silly to be that paralyzed person who continues to feel guilty for not getting up and jogging. Same thing happened once I admitted I was alcoholic - I had to admit that the nature of alcoholism is that I'll continue to fail. That I simply don't have the ability to master it. That no matter how much dry-time I can put together, it just won't work. My experience bore that reality out and while it seemed like a "bad" thing to admit, it opened me up from a standpoint of willingness to continue on with the rest of the process of recovery. Think of all the things that guy in the wheelchair can accomplish once he/she stops putting all their effort into something that can't possibly happen - proper direction of the will, as they say.

Analog, perhaps your different in that maybe you can keep yourself sober - what we'd call a "hard drinker" in AA. If that's the case, keep up the effort and hopefully you can pull it together in time with some practice and straighten life out. On the other hand, perhaps you're an alcoholic, in which case that you drank isn't an indication of failure so much as it is a sign-post to the condition of alcoholism like it's talked about in AA. In either case though, there is a solution. Which one is necessary for you will become clear, if it isn't already.

best of luck to ya whatever you decide.