MachinistGuy

Recently I have been chatting online with a new female friend. I like her, she's clever, sarcastic and cynical. We share interests in common.
Doesn't hurt that she is very attractive too.

A few days ago she suggested we meet up in the real world, for a date.
As we were discussing the logistics of the date I started feeling the beginnings of anxiety. Except after a while I realised that it wasn't anxiety, it was anticipation - of a fun day out with someone who is on my wavelength. I can't remember the last time I had any kind of positive emotional response to a situation.

Before I would have been thinking like this :-

1) I look and feel like crap, how can I disguise that ?
2) I have to drive, how am I going to handle withdrawal so I do it sober ?
3) How can I time things so I can get another drink ASAP ?
4) I'm going to feel anxiety, will I have a panic attack ?
5) She'll hate me anyway, why bother to put myself through this ?

Anyone recognise any of those feelings ?

Now it's different and I owe this to the absence of alcohol in my life. It really is like having a great weight lifted off my shoulders, and the first positive mental change I have noticed since I stopped drinking.

Bird615

I like to think of not having to drink anymore as freedom! It really is a huge weight lifted off of me.

ScottFromWI

Yes, it's pretty amazing what can happen when we quit sedating ourselves every day, isn't it!

NewDayOne

I use to feel very much like what you described.

I'm only on day 6, but feeling a million times better than I use to.

Congrats on the freedom and the opportunity!

MachinistGuy

It's quite disconcerting and a little bit scary too, when you mistake happiness for anxiety

Jules714

You are night and day different from when you started posting! It's really great to "see"
Have a wonderful date.
Jules

Mummyto2

I can identify with those 5 things, its amazing what we can achieve sober, hope you have an amazing time

hellrzr

Not to poo poo on your excitement but have you been sober long? If not it would be a good idea to hold off and work on yourself some more so you can be the person you want to be before getting into a relationship with someone else. Or at least keep things in mind and go very slowly with this lady if you really like her. Good luck and if you do meet up I hope it goes well for you!

MachinistGuy

3 months. I'm not expecting anything from this meeting except a day out.

The exciting thing is that I am starting to look forward to certain events now I haven't got booze getting in the way - it's not really about the date as such. Does that make any sense ? - I hope so

RecklessEric

It makes perfect sense.
Who knows, maybe the one date will turn into two.
The point is, the real you will go on the date. Not some fearful, medicated person.
I really hope you have fun.
And if nothing else, it proves that people find the real you interesting.