day 1
Member
Join Date: Oct 2015
Posts: 2,393
Jenuk, welcome to the family. You CAN do this. Please read all over SR, so much experience to relate to...and be inspired to emulate! Share, post, partake of the community. I talk as if I represent SR, ha! Hardly. I just want to encourage you to get what I got here...hope and strength from comrades.
I hope the awesome support and wisdom here can help you get sober for good. Member
Join Date: Apr 2014
Location: UK
Posts: 6,902
Welcome Jen. This is a great support network, and no doubt there's a room full of people who'd love to support you through this just round the corner from where you live. Why not check out the options for meeting them. They may well be sober now, but they remember just how this feels and can support you through this... Find a Meeting | AA Meetings | Alcoholics Anonymous (Great Britain) Ltd
No doubt your A/V (addictive voice )will be up and shouting before you've even considered breakfast, telling you that there's no need to be so dramatic, life would not be worth living without alcohol, you can't get sober, no one would like you sober, etc. Etc. Those AVs are fairly predictable and really know how to lie to us.
Tips for today...
Resist thinking beyond today. Just focus on not drinking today. And tomorrow do the same, and the next day and the next day. If we start thinking about the whole future without alcohol it's a little scary and panic inducing.
Keep your fluids up.
Avoid the HALT triggers (Hungry. Angry. Lonely. Tired.) You may not feel like eating, but do it anyway, little and often. (Honestly. Remember that Snickers advert? That.)
If you feel ill and there are possibilities that it could be wishdrawal get yourself to a doctor (or A&E if needs be - getting an appointment at my surgery is like getting an audience with HRH granted).
Check in here and read and post regularly. Constantly if needs be.
Today and the next few weeks might not feel comfortable. That's okay. Feelings are very raw in the early stages so they feel really intense. That does pass. But only by pushing through it (sober).
The longer it is between the present moment and your last drink, the quieter your AV will become. So the bad news is that you can't switch the little eff-er off, but the good news is that you don't need to act on anything it says. I tended to think of mine (once I recognised it for what it was) as a wingeing, whining toddler.
You can do this. It might feel scary, and like the end of your life. But it can be the start of your living, not the end. Sobriety might seem boring and painful just now, but believe me (and plenty of others on here) it can be amazing, and full of blessings.
I wish you all the best for your sobriety and recovery. BB
No doubt your A/V (addictive voice )will be up and shouting before you've even considered breakfast, telling you that there's no need to be so dramatic, life would not be worth living without alcohol, you can't get sober, no one would like you sober, etc. Etc. Those AVs are fairly predictable and really know how to lie to us.
Tips for today...
Resist thinking beyond today. Just focus on not drinking today. And tomorrow do the same, and the next day and the next day. If we start thinking about the whole future without alcohol it's a little scary and panic inducing.
Keep your fluids up.
Avoid the HALT triggers (Hungry. Angry. Lonely. Tired.) You may not feel like eating, but do it anyway, little and often. (Honestly. Remember that Snickers advert? That.)
If you feel ill and there are possibilities that it could be wishdrawal get yourself to a doctor (or A&E if needs be - getting an appointment at my surgery is like getting an audience with HRH granted).
Check in here and read and post regularly. Constantly if needs be.
Today and the next few weeks might not feel comfortable. That's okay. Feelings are very raw in the early stages so they feel really intense. That does pass. But only by pushing through it (sober).
The longer it is between the present moment and your last drink, the quieter your AV will become. So the bad news is that you can't switch the little eff-er off, but the good news is that you don't need to act on anything it says. I tended to think of mine (once I recognised it for what it was) as a wingeing, whining toddler.
You can do this. It might feel scary, and like the end of your life. But it can be the start of your living, not the end. Sobriety might seem boring and painful just now, but believe me (and plenty of others on here) it can be amazing, and full of blessings.
I wish you all the best for your sobriety and recovery. BB
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jul 2017
Posts: 219
Thanks to everyone for all the messages, it means a lot. Not got much to say for myself at this point. Threw away another month yet again. Had a bad night last night and feeling exhausted and low. Hope to be back soon. No more day 1s.
02.27.15 :): ▽VII△VIII
Join Date: Mar 2013
Location: California
Posts: 2,802
Welcome! Keep posting. Also check out the newcomers forum. Staying close to SR has made a huge difference to so many. It definitely kept me sober on many nights that could easily have gone wrong.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jul 2017
Posts: 219
Hi guys. Thanks again for the replies. I have never tried anything like this forum so it feels strange, but good.
Feeling a lot better today having finally slept.
As you may have guessed this is not my first day 1. I couldn't even guess at how many there have been now. I have been doing it on my own and in secret for years now because I was convinced I was in control and knew best. I wasn't someone who needed anyone else. I could stop anytime and it was always my choice to go back to it when I did. Recently I have come to the realisation that I have spent the last 10 years of my life having that last ever drink and beginning day 1. Convinced without a doubt it was my final day 1 ever. Again. Until a few days or weeks later I would be back at day 1 again like some kind of alcoholic groundhog day.
I was basically doing the same thing over and over and hoping and expecting it would turn out different. The exact definition of insanity. I has been visiting this forum for quite some time before but never registered. But now I realise I need to do something different. Even if it is just one thing to start. What I have been doing so far is not working. Just typing this makes me feel a little more positive this time around.
Feeling a lot better today having finally slept.
As you may have guessed this is not my first day 1. I couldn't even guess at how many there have been now. I have been doing it on my own and in secret for years now because I was convinced I was in control and knew best. I wasn't someone who needed anyone else. I could stop anytime and it was always my choice to go back to it when I did. Recently I have come to the realisation that I have spent the last 10 years of my life having that last ever drink and beginning day 1. Convinced without a doubt it was my final day 1 ever. Again. Until a few days or weeks later I would be back at day 1 again like some kind of alcoholic groundhog day.
I was basically doing the same thing over and over and hoping and expecting it would turn out different. The exact definition of insanity. I has been visiting this forum for quite some time before but never registered. But now I realise I need to do something different. Even if it is just one thing to start. What I have been doing so far is not working. Just typing this makes me feel a little more positive this time around.
Member
Join Date: Oct 2016
Location: CA
Posts: 1,060
Welcome to a new life Jenuk,
The first few days, weeks, months are tough. You have to commit to being strong and surrender to the fact that booze will not pass your lips. I would also suggest attending AA or some other recovery program. They are structured and help to alleviate the anxiety, loneliness, and isolation. Plus you might meet a supportive sober friend. It sounds scary right now but you have to change everything to avoid doing the same thing. Good luck and comeback often especially before picking up a drink. We are here 24/7 to help one another.
The first few days, weeks, months are tough. You have to commit to being strong and surrender to the fact that booze will not pass your lips. I would also suggest attending AA or some other recovery program. They are structured and help to alleviate the anxiety, loneliness, and isolation. Plus you might meet a supportive sober friend. It sounds scary right now but you have to change everything to avoid doing the same thing. Good luck and comeback often especially before picking up a drink. We are here 24/7 to help one another.
Member
Join Date: May 2017
Posts: 82
Is there anything you would like to do, but can't because of your drinking ?
Is there anything you are currently doing, but that you could do a lot better if you didn't drink ?
I have found that promising myself something as a light at the end of the tunnel has helped me.
Is there anything you are currently doing, but that you could do a lot better if you didn't drink ?
I have found that promising myself something as a light at the end of the tunnel has helped me.
Community Greeter
Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: Upstate New York
Posts: 51,536
Good to meet you, Jen. I felt the same way when I first came here - I just couldn't do it anymore. That was almost 10 yrs. ago - so I know you can get free and stay that way. Congrats on your decision to reclaim your life. We're with you. 
Soberado
Join Date: May 2017
Location: Cleveland Ohio-ish
Posts: 395
Originally Posted by jenuk 
Hi guys. Thanks again for the replies. I have never tried anything like this forum so it feels strange, but good.
Feeling a lot better today having finally slept.
As you may have guessed this is not my first day 1. I couldn't even guess at how many there have been now. I have been doing it on my own and in secret for years now because I was convinced I was in control and knew best. I wasn't someone who needed anyone else. I could stop anytime and it was always my choice to go back to it when I did. Recently I have come to the realisation that I have spent the last 10 years of my life having that last ever drink and beginning day 1. Convinced without a doubt it was my final day 1 ever. Again. Until a few days or weeks later I would be back at day 1 again like some kind of alcoholic groundhog day.
I was basically doing the same thing over and over and hoping and expecting it would turn out different. The exact definition of insanity. I has been visiting this forum for quite some time before but never registered. But now I realise I need to do something different. Even if it is just one thing to start. What I have been doing so far is not working. Just typing this makes me feel a little more positive this time around.
Feeling a lot better today having finally slept.
As you may have guessed this is not my first day 1. I couldn't even guess at how many there have been now. I have been doing it on my own and in secret for years now because I was convinced I was in control and knew best. I wasn't someone who needed anyone else. I could stop anytime and it was always my choice to go back to it when I did. Recently I have come to the realisation that I have spent the last 10 years of my life having that last ever drink and beginning day 1. Convinced without a doubt it was my final day 1 ever. Again. Until a few days or weeks later I would be back at day 1 again like some kind of alcoholic groundhog day.
I was basically doing the same thing over and over and hoping and expecting it would turn out different. The exact definition of insanity. I has been visiting this forum for quite some time before but never registered. But now I realise I need to do something different. Even if it is just one thing to start. What I have been doing so far is not working. Just typing this makes me feel a little more positive this time around.
Alcoholic Groundhog Day summed it up for me for a long long time. It was tough for me to share here for awhile too, I just wasn't comfortable spilling my guts about my drinking problem because I really felt that nobody could possibly care. Well I was so wrong, folks here do care and have gobs of wisdom to share and help. I check this forum everyday now and always learn something about myself, others and this disease we share.
Sobriety is always the better option and definitely worth giving it a go for good.
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