LancashireLass

I'm my opinion I have coped really well for the past few months but I have suddenly hit the wall!
My husband really doesn't get me being sober and is constantly bringing alcohol into the house, getting drunk etc etc.
I have actually found myself questioning my sobriety for the past few days but I don't think meetings are something I can do. I am struggling in an argument with myself.

awuh1

What will it hurt to go to a meeting?

Perhaps understanding AA a bit better could give you enough information to determine if it's for you?

If you go I'd advise that you let folks know it's your first meeting.

All the best to you.

least

Altho I no longer go to meetings, I'd suggest you not write them off until you've tried a few. Can't hurt and might help.

Aellyce

AA is not the only recovery meeting option. I've tried different kinds with different philosophies. Ended up liking SMART the best - their program is very useful for relapse prevention and for coping with challenging situations.

Doug39

AA has changed my life. AA isn't only about being sober - it is about changing your way of life and thinking.

PhoenixJ

AA IS NOT FOR ANYONE. It is there because people who cannot drink help each other. I go- it is not 'for me'. Being very rich and happy would be. It is free. Support to you.

hellrzr

Folks seem to think that everyone in AA wanted to attend meetings to get help. Believe me, no one every wanted to start going to AA meetings!!! We all tried to find a softer, gentler way but if you ever found yourself at an AA meeting then you know those other methods we try on our own don't work. When the pain is bad enough and you are truly ready to change an AA meeting will be there full of people just waiting to help!

Also, you need to know that by you going to an AA meeting and asking for help that you will be helping other people more than you will ever know. You might actually help save someones life by asking for help. That will make sense someday if you start working the program of AA : ).

fini

hi LL,
what is the argument with yourself about? drinking or not drinking?
is that what you mean by 'questioning my sobriety'?

i don't know your history, but do remember comparing myself, after a little while sober, and always coming up with ah, i'm not so bad....not questioning my sobriety as such but questioning the need and want for it... and then later, when i was convinced of the need, i couldn't stick with it.

there is no requirement to go to meetings in order to be and stay sober.
questioning your sobriety and questioning meeting attendance are unrelated.
it is certainly possible to be and stay sober without ever going to a meeting.

however, it does sound iffy whether one will stay sober when questioning one's sobriety....you are not convinced of the need for it and wonder if you need to find out for certain?

August252015

AGREED!!!

I started going (I did about 82 meetings in 90 days) after years of kicking, screaming and railing against AA. Why it wouldn't work, etc....but it does, if you work it, as we say in the program.

It is tough when others don't support us and I am incredibly fortunate that everyone in my life supports and cheers on my sobriety. If anyone doesn't, I don't "let them in" - I understand that is very hard with family, but my sobriety is the single most important thing to me. Period.

I'd give AA a try -a legit try. This isn't about your husband, but about your life and your sobriety. Take care of yourself.

VigilanceNow

I agree with the others. I didn't think AA was for me either... The religious aspect especially turned me off. It had also been described to me as somewhat of a cult, as if the people who go are completely obsessed with it. And hey, sometimes that's the case; mostnof the time it's not. It's literally just a group of people who follow a program and support each other. Your husband doesn't have to "get" it, though it must be hard with alcohol in the house. That was my first rule for myself - no booze in my living space under any circumstances. If it's there, 99% likelihood I'll drink it if I think I can get away with it.

Honestly, give AA a solid chance! It saves lives :-)

Fly N Buy

The program of AA is not for those who need it but for those who want it. Your thread reminded me of this quote from the book Alcoholics Anonymous;

There is a principle which is a bar against all information, which is proof against all arguments and which can not fail to keep a man in everlasting ignorance-that principle is contempt prior to investigation."
--HERBERT SPENCER

Berrybean

Maybe have a look through Dees thread about making a plan (again). There will no doubt be things you can add into your own recovery plan without AS being necessarily a part of it.

One suggestion I have is making more use of this forum as a resource. You have been on the forum for about 4 months and only posted 17 times. So only once or twice a week. Perhaps reading and posting daily could be a part of your plan so that you feel more in touch with this community.

Have you joined any other groups since quitting the booze, pursuing your interests and getting to know people in non-drinking environments. Forming some good quality sober friendships can only help.

Wishing you all the best for your sobriety and recovery. BB

PS. I think it's a shame to write off meetings before trying them though. Contempt prior to investigation would be a pretty sorry stumbling block. Xx