Reaching out yet again,
 

Why do I sabotage myself? It seems when everything is on the up and up I ALWAYS end up back in the same situation. It always starts with an innocuous 6-pack then, almost instantly, wind up back in the same situation. Was doing well for a couple of months, now this, sheesh!

I found when I drink my life turns to crap quickly then when I stop it gets better quickly. I think my hugher power is trying to tell me something and I think I finally figured it out. I Do not want to get complacent ever again so I emerse myself in meetings, steps, and forums like this.

Do you want to quit? More than anything else? That's what it came down to for me: the choice of an uncertain sober future or certain death by drinking. I'm an extreme case in some ways, yet the choice is the same for each of us.

You can quit, if you want to. There are tons of ideas and suggestions on how and on plans/programs - mine is AA and it has saved my life. Others have seen success with other options from just SR support to AVRT and other.

Good luck.

Thank all of you for your input, it provides the strength I so need to whip this beast!

Welcome back Steadwell. My guess would be that you end up in the same place because you keep doing the same thing. What exactly have you tried when you quit drinking? Have you tried a formal plan/program or meetings? Have you spoken with a counselor or doctor? Have you tried to engage yourself here on SR or other recovery communities?

As a general rule, you'll get as much back out of sobriety as you put into it.

I came to understand that in AA, as a lack of an effective mental defense against the first drink. So I had to find a reliable defense. It tried to get picky about that, but in the end it came down to a simple choice. Live life on a spiritual basis, or face an alcoholic death. Pretty stark. I tried my best to find an alternative, but there were none.

The result has been a totally reliable 24/7 defense which has stood every kind of test over many years, and never failed.

When you're clinging on to life by a thread because alcoholism is Robbing you of everything then you'll realise what a farce and illusion that alcohol really is. Or you can quit now and formulate a plan and go to work on it. It's your choice. I hope you choose the latter.

It always starts with an innocuous 6-pack

Steadwell, it starts before that. exactly where and how...i don't know. but it starts before you drink the first one out of the six-pack, and it starts before you buy the six-pack...it starts in your head before you open the door to the store or the get into your car to drive there.

which is why you'll hear so many speak about needing to change some fundamental mindset.

Supporto to you. Soberw has it nailed- i think.

I had to remember that 6 packs were never innocuous to a drinker like me.
It was always the first drink that started the madness, not the last.

I'd look at whatever you've been doing to stay sober and accept that that's not been enough.

What could you add? :dunno:

D

A 6 pack is not innocuous. A normal drinker would not think that sucking down a 6 pack of beer was harmless.