Old 04-11-2017, 05:25 PM
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Join Date: Jul 2015
Location: Tampa, Florida
Posts: 42

I haven't come here in a long time. Things were getting better for a while and then, a few months ago... Started drinking again and using diet pills... Told myself the same old lie, this time I will manage, and of course, today, desperate to find a solution, feeling powerless. When will I ever learn. When will I ever stop? For a while, I bought these small bottles of vodka (So that I would control my intake of alcohol... Same with the pills by the way...) I ended up with drinking 750ml/day of vodka and spending 440 dollars a week on these pills... Completely broke... Owing money left and right... Exhausted... So here I am again... Looking for help. I am down tonight. Scared and very lonely. Haven't had a drink and a pill for 48 hours now. Not feeling too well either but staying over at my mother. Managed to work both days but staying in bed the rest of the time. Very very depressed, tired, anxious...
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Old 04-11-2017, 06:01 PM
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Location: SF Bay area, CA
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I hope you can get back on the sober path soon.
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Old 04-11-2017, 06:06 PM
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Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: Upstate New York
Posts: 49,103
I felt the same when I first came here, futureve. Talking things over with those who understood made a huge difference to me. You're never alone - there's always someone around to listen and care. Glad to have you with us!
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Old 04-11-2017, 06:09 PM
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Location: Wareham, Mass
Posts: 7,067
Just think about today, futureve. Don't drink today.
Truly, a day, an hour, a minute at a time.
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Old 04-11-2017, 10:37 PM
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Join Date: Jan 2016
Location: Seattle, WA
Posts: 69
You are more than just an alcoholic. Alcohol just holds us back from being who we should be. I'm just 3 days ahead of where you're at. Don't fret about the money issues. They will get worked out in time. Focus on you right now. Try and go for a short walk even though you may not want to. Thank your mom for being there for you. Maybe help her make a nice dinner. I stayed with my dad during my first 4 days and we made chicken picatta... It was delicious and was something that made me feel accomplished and helpful even though i was tired after. I started perking up day 3 and feel pretty good day 5. You will get there.
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Old 04-11-2017, 10:50 PM
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Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 205,707
Welcome back eve - this community gave me hope and support when I needed it.

You're no different to anyone else here
Welcome back

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Old 04-12-2017, 06:22 AM
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Join Date: May 2012
Location: Wisconsin, USA
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Originally Posted by futureve View Post
. When will I ever learn. When will I ever stop?
Welcome back futureve. I asked myself that same question lots of times too, most of us did. The answer is that it's your choice - you get to decide when you stop. The power lies within you already. Stick around and we'll help you bring it out.
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Old 04-12-2017, 09:03 AM
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Join Date: May 2014
Posts: 258
I really hope you can talk to your doctor honestly and soon.
Maybe he can help you get the depression under control.
Actually thinking about anti-depressants myself. They don't all make you sleepy and with very little or no side effects. I'm 45 and well let's face it, getting to that phase in life. Can't wait for the hot flashes!
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