Madnellie

Hi folks, I'm a regular lurker on the forums but I don't post often. I'm 11 months sober today and I'm really struggling, I feel like I just want to give up . Life feels very overwhelming without alcohol, even though objectively my life is so much better now it doesn't feel that way inside. Do any of you kind folks have any words of wisdom to help pull me out of my funk please? I don't want to call my sponsor right now as it's 4am here and I'm at work, but I could really do with a bit of a kick up the arse!

Gottalife

Life is way better today, yet internally things are not so good. The steps are what treat the internal condition. How are you going with them. If you are well on, maybe it is time to sit down quietly and talk to the God of your understanding, try and pick up what his will is for you, and do it.

Often in my journey I run into a bad patch for only two reasons. One is I am doing something I should not be, and the other is I am not doing something I should be doing.

Hope that is enought food for thought/action.

It will pass.

Simplicity4114

Hi Madnellie! I'm glad you reached out First, congrats on 11 months sober I've had a similar experience.....I quit drinking and life improved exponentially on the outside; my relationships improved along with my work performance, my house is far more orderly, and yet I found myself white knuckling my way through every day. After almost 7 months of sobriety I relapsed. This was my wake-up call, my fork in the road. This is when I made the choice to move from sobriety (strictly not drinking) into recovery. I visited my doc and got on an anti-depressant and began meeting regularly with a counselor. After several months of counseling I feel so much more balanced, my internal self is in harmony with my external life.
I'm not trying to advocate meds if they're not necessary, just trying to say that for me sobriety (no alcohol) was only one piece of the puzzle. I had to dig a little deeper to find the other "missing pieces" towards wholeness.
Praying you find that internal peace that feels lacking right now.......keep posting away, dig deep, and never, ever, ever give up!

SnazzyDresser

Hang in there, Madnellie. Your 11 months sober is a fantastic achievement, keep at it.

2ndhandrose

Hi Madnellie, 11 months is fantastic!!!

I felt a lot like you in my first year. The outside was improving but I was feeling not so great on the inside still.

I have found that recovery is a lot like peeling an onion, just when I think "is that all there is?" another layer comes off and so much more is revealed.

Also, I do have depression which I finally took the plunge and agreed to try an antidepressant. That has gone a long way to evening me out.

You are doing great! I look forward to see you posting, this is an amazing place for info, wisdom and support.

Dee74

hi and welcome back madnellie

maybe stick around here for a while? there's security in numbers and nothing like some SR to recharge me and ground me in my recovery.

D

MrMcTell

I pretty much just logged on to start a thread like this. I'm not even at three months yet but have hit a big slump again.... There ain't much today but get putting one foot in front of the other and just keep going!

11 months is a great inspiration to me. You are doing great.

Madnellie

Thank you so much everyone for your support and kind words. Today has been much better. I got a good day's sleep (I work midnights) which has helped a lot, had a very honest chat with my HP and my gf (although not at the same time lol) and I'm heading right to see my sponsor and to a meeting after work in the morning. I can't thank you guys and girls on here enough for being there for me. And Dee74, I'm definitely going to be sticking around, I'm floored at how so many people took to the time to offer comfort and wisdom to someone who has barely posted. Thank you!

Madnellie

3 months is amazing! Every day we're both getting closer to where we want to be Keep it up my friend, this too shall pass.

PhoenixJ

welcome

CoffeeInstead

Congrats on 11 months - almost a full year, that is amazing. Hang in there. The hardest part for me right now is I feel like I lost my best friend. Hopefully I can find something to replace that feeling!!

grubby

I like your name

Madnellie

That's exactly how I feel! I've been told that's completely normal because alcohol was a best friend to many of us. I had it described to me as being like the grieving process - you have lost something very dear to you and it's OK to mourn that. Knowing that helped me very much. I'm still looking for something to replace it with, for me the winter was especially hard because I have a tendency to isolate myself anyway and the bad weather just encourages that.
How long do you have sober, Coffee?

MeMeMe7711

Please hang in there you're an inspiration to all try to get one day sober let alone 11 months.