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I hate myself

Old 04-05-2017, 08:31 AM
  # 21 (permalink)  
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Originally Posted by drunkgirl97 View Post
...it hurts to think of everything I've destroyed because of alcohol .
Yet your solution is to keep drinking. You hate who alcohol has made you, yet you are scared you won't meet people if you don't drink.

The insanity of alcoholism.

There is a solution if you are willing to grasp it.
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Old 04-05-2017, 08:32 AM
  # 22 (permalink)  
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Originally Posted by drunkgirl97 View Post
thank you everyone I'm going to take you r advice and call up some numbers it definitely wont hurt

right now though I'm going to go lie down, I've just got off a three day bender and I'm not feeling too hot ...
thats probably the best time to start action and get on the phone.
DG, yer 19.you have your whole life ahead of you and if you get into action NOW to get help( you don't have to do it alone and deserve the help) theres YPAA-young people AA. ya know, one of the BEST AA speakers I have heard was a woman that had just celebrated 28 years sober and she was 42 years old.
I went to a meeting a while ago and a 41 year old man had just celebrated 22 years of recovery.
I have met and seen young people in AA and it ALWAYS puts a smile on my face to see youngens comin in AND staying.
PLEASE get into action NOW. you deserve it!
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Old 04-05-2017, 08:36 AM
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The hopelessness and the helplessness is all the disease talking. It will sh*t all over your feelings every opportunity it gets. Once you begin to learn to face life sober, those negative feelings begin to stop. But you have to be willing to put the work in. Is it hard? Sure it is. But as anyone else here will tell you, it's worth the effort. Every. Single. Second.
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Old 04-05-2017, 10:15 AM
  # 24 (permalink)  
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hope is never lost, maybe misplaced.

rest up and keep posting.

deargirl, I will keep you close in my thoughts.

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Old 04-05-2017, 10:19 AM
  # 25 (permalink)  
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Hi drunkgirl..

I hope later you will feel a bit better.

I know that heart wrenching feeling of a sick body and mind after drinking..

You will have all the support possible here for you, but we all know, the only one who can truly change things is yourself.

It's never too late.
If you fall down, pick yourself back up.

Keep trying. X
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Old 04-05-2017, 03:40 PM
  # 26 (permalink)  
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Don't wait too long to call those numbers dg

D
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Old 04-05-2017, 03:56 PM
  # 27 (permalink)  
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Drunkgirl - give yourself credit for coming here & being honest about your drinking. When I was 19 I was just beginning to think it was an answer to everything. Back then I thought it was helping me cope with life - it was my friend. I would never have admitted I had a problem - just thought I needed to use more willpower. As a result, my life was almost destroyed. I was completely dependent on it & drinking all day when I found SR.

You can have the wonderful life you deserve. You already know what many of us didn't at 19 - you can't drink. I'm glad you're here - please keep reading & posting.
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Old 04-08-2017, 06:54 AM
  # 28 (permalink)  
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Hi everyone

sorry for the depressing rant the other day ,

I'm afraid to say things have not improved I am "getting drunk 24/7 now " getting more and more sick everyday , to sick eat anything etc. ; what can I say , you've all tried to help me but I'm incapable of helping myself

thanks all the same
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Old 04-08-2017, 07:06 AM
  # 29 (permalink)  
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It's not over yet, deargirl

Keep posting here, I don't believe you are incapable of helping yourself. Because you are posting here, it shows that you are reaching out.

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Old 04-08-2017, 07:06 AM
  # 30 (permalink)  
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Sounds as though you are fully aware how your life is being destroyed and that you need to stop, but you can't imagine the thought of not drinking.

I'd be willing to bet everyone who posts on here has felt the same way. I remember actually thinking sober people were fools and how they didn't know what they were missing. This is how bad alcohol can warp the mind.

Unfortunately, you're probably going to have to experience something tragic, or face an ultimatum from loved ones before that switch is flipped in your brain that will force you to make a change. I'm not criticizing you at all, I've just been down this road and know the power alcohol can hold over you.

In the meantime, just don't get behind the wheel. Good luck to you.
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Old 04-08-2017, 07:11 AM
  # 31 (permalink)  
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deargirl, did you ever look into rehab? I know you have said AA didn't work out, I think Dee suggested looking for a women's only group?

I haven't used anything but SR. There is a lot of wisdom and some very caring people on this board.

We come here as strangers and very quickly become part of the SR family.

please stay with us

You are already part of the family!
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Old 04-08-2017, 07:14 AM
  # 32 (permalink)  
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Originally Posted by puddlejumper70 View Post
In the meantime, just don't get behind the wheel. Good luck to you.
luckily I don't drive so that's one thing to be happy about , at least I'm only destroying my own life
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Old 04-08-2017, 07:20 AM
  # 33 (permalink)  
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Originally Posted by ScottFromWI View Post
It does sound crazy, but then again addiction is crazy. To be honest I think you need to probably quit seeing him...so whether he wants to go out with you or not is kind of irrelevant. If you keep drinking bad things are going to happen to you, so you need to get away from people who promote it.
I agree, d-girl. It sounds like perhaps you have gotten "the gift of desperation?" When I finally had mine- after so, so SO many lows and losses and pain of every kind- I quit drinking.

I hope to see you here and I would also hope you seek outside help - AA can truly be the best start- free and it is available every day.

Good luck. it might seem absolutely impossible - crazy- to think that you can have a completely different and better life - but you can. Promise.
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Old 04-08-2017, 07:29 AM
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Originally Posted by August252015 View Post
it might seem absolutely impossible - crazy- to think that you can have a completely different and better life - but you can. Promise.
So, so, so true ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

You can make this happen
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Old 04-08-2017, 09:26 AM
  # 35 (permalink)  
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I hate myself too. And I'm not a victim either.

I was just an ******* when I was drinking, and now that's the person I am to people. I deserve it.
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Old 04-08-2017, 09:50 AM
  # 36 (permalink)  
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I'm scared if I stop drinking I'll stop going out and meeting people .
Drunkgirl97, your statement was a major concern of mine too. Goin on 7 years sober those people I meet that were hoping to get a drink out of me just move on to the next person and it don't bother me one bit. All those worries will go away with time sober and you will meet people, even drinkers who won't care at all that you don't drink. We are all rootin for ya.
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Old 04-08-2017, 02:49 PM
  # 37 (permalink)  
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Originally Posted by drunkgirl97 View Post
I'm afraid to say things have not improved I am "getting drunk 24/7 now " getting more and more sick everyday , to sick eat anything etc. ; what can I say , you've all tried to help me but I'm incapable of helping myself

thanks all the same
I don't believe you'd post if you've given up hope.

If nothing else think about joining the April support thread.
It's for everyone quitting this month & all you need to do to join is post.

http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...art-one-5.html

Great support there...with a few sober days under your belt you might be able to figure out what's next?

D
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Old 04-08-2017, 03:09 PM
  # 38 (permalink)  
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god bless all you people I never thought id get so many responses , I don't know what id do if it wasn't for this site , I'm going to try and get to rehab or another treatment center and get sober and as for the guy, you're all right my health is more important .
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Old 04-08-2017, 05:54 PM
  # 39 (permalink)  
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You can turn it all around and have a wonderful life, DG.
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Old 04-08-2017, 06:23 PM
  # 40 (permalink)  
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Originally Posted by drunkgirl97 View Post
I'm 19 ,I know pretty young to be in such a state
I was 21 when problems with alcohol became noticeable to myself and others.

But I was young and that was that. Fifteen years later I realized enough was enough.

Most people can drink responsibly but that wasn't me. Why not me?

I don't know and it doesn't matter.

All I know is I can't enjoy a couple of drinks like say my wife.

And if all I can have is a couple then best not to drink at all.
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