Back to square one
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2016
Posts: 60
Back to square one
So that just one more drink has turned into a full blown relapse. I'm back to square one. My sister said she will lend me some money to get myself into a proper rehab. I've found one that isn't 12 based and no pressure to fill in my life story and read it out to strangers. It's for 6 weeks.
It's quite a lot of money but if it keeps me sober then it will be nothing compared to what i'll spend on alcohol if i carry on drinking all year.
If you had this chance and was as desperate as me, would you take it. I can't do this on my own and my doctor won't prescribe meds because i have a bit of a history of overdosing on various medication.
It's quite a lot of money but if it keeps me sober then it will be nothing compared to what i'll spend on alcohol if i carry on drinking all year.
If you had this chance and was as desperate as me, would you take it. I can't do this on my own and my doctor won't prescribe meds because i have a bit of a history of overdosing on various medication.
Member
Join Date: Aug 2016
Location: Queensland
Posts: 568
Definitely do it. I went to rehab and it was the best decision.... 5 months sober and before November last year I could not get 2 days sober in a row.
You have a great sis
cherish her and yourself. You deserve to have a happy life free of poison.
You have a great sis
cherish her and yourself. You deserve to have a happy life free of poison.
12 Step Recovered Alcoholic
Join Date: Apr 2012
Location: New Zealand
Posts: 6,613
Rehab often gets people sober. It's not too hard to not drink in a friendly and sheltered environment. But it is a mistake to think it will keep you sober. That will require a whole new mindset, and at the moment, you seem to be picking and choosing what you will and wont do to get sober.
I was in your shoes one time, took the rehab, stayed sober for about three months in total. Then later I had another opportunity, by which time I was totally desperate. I knew the rehab game, what to say and do so no one got too close or bothered me too much. I instinctively knew that it was a bad idea for me. I turned it down, (and it was free) in favour of staying out in the world and facing the things I didn't want to face, and doing things I didn't want to do. I've been sober ever since.
I was in your shoes one time, took the rehab, stayed sober for about three months in total. Then later I had another opportunity, by which time I was totally desperate. I knew the rehab game, what to say and do so no one got too close or bothered me too much. I instinctively knew that it was a bad idea for me. I turned it down, (and it was free) in favour of staying out in the world and facing the things I didn't want to face, and doing things I didn't want to do. I've been sober ever since.
Member
Join Date: Mar 2017
Posts: 72
I think everyone is right!
If you feel like you absolutely cannot stop drinking unless you go to rehab, then go. You are very lucky to have your sister willing to lend you the money.
But, it won't keep you from drinking once you get out, it may give you tools to use, but only you can keep yourself from drinking by using them.
Whatever you decide I wish you the best.
But in answer to the question "If you had this chance and was as desperate as me, would you take it?" I was as desperate as you, but I did it myself because in the end, I thought it was my own responsiblity to take control of my own drinking. But everyone is different and go about the same things in different ways
If you feel like you absolutely cannot stop drinking unless you go to rehab, then go. You are very lucky to have your sister willing to lend you the money.
But, it won't keep you from drinking once you get out, it may give you tools to use, but only you can keep yourself from drinking by using them.
Whatever you decide I wish you the best.
But in answer to the question "If you had this chance and was as desperate as me, would you take it?" I was as desperate as you, but I did it myself because in the end, I thought it was my own responsiblity to take control of my own drinking. But everyone is different and go about the same things in different ways
Member
Join Date: Aug 2016
Location: Queensland
Posts: 568
A couple of posts here seem to imply rehab is not a great opportunity to assist in sobriety and that you should do it in your current environment if you want to succeed which I find outlandish!
Yes, you need to be willing to use the tools you will learn while there but my god, it is an absolutely awesome kick start to stop the vicious cycle of drinking.
Without rehab I know I would still be drinking without a doubt. It saved me and countless other people.
Yes, you need to be willing to use the tools you will learn while there but my god, it is an absolutely awesome kick start to stop the vicious cycle of drinking.
Without rehab I know I would still be drinking without a doubt. It saved me and countless other people.
Member
Join Date: Mar 2017
Location: South Dakota
Posts: 48
I'm not sure how long you were sober, before that 'one drink' set you spiraling downwards, but couple of things I would say to think about.
Rehab I think can be a great thing to help you stop drinking. But, is stopping the problem or is it staying stopped over the long term?
I've never had a problem with stopping, but resisting that 'one drink' 1 week, 1 month, 1 year on is mine, and many others problem.
I think I said this in another thread, an alcoholic's brain isn't wired like normal folks to drink in moderation, it only takes that 'one drink' and it starts all over again.
So I'd take up your sisters very generous offer to get you through the short term quitting, but I'm less than convinced that it'll cure the long term issue, for that you are going to need to figure out what support you need when those stressful times will get that voice in your head telling you, "don't worry, it's only one drink"!
Rehab I think can be a great thing to help you stop drinking. But, is stopping the problem or is it staying stopped over the long term?
I've never had a problem with stopping, but resisting that 'one drink' 1 week, 1 month, 1 year on is mine, and many others problem.
I think I said this in another thread, an alcoholic's brain isn't wired like normal folks to drink in moderation, it only takes that 'one drink' and it starts all over again.
So I'd take up your sisters very generous offer to get you through the short term quitting, but I'm less than convinced that it'll cure the long term issue, for that you are going to need to figure out what support you need when those stressful times will get that voice in your head telling you, "don't worry, it's only one drink"!
Forum Leader
Join Date: May 2012
Location: Wisconsin, USA
Posts: 16,945
I would certainly take the offer as you may never get it again. What's probably most important though is whether you are actually ready to quit - if you aren't you'll most likely be wasting your sister's money. You have been to rehab before - are you prepared to do what it takes while you are there? It's not a place where they will just "fix" you..the bulk of the work that needs to be done will need to be work done by you. And you probably won't like doing some of it to be honest.
So yes, absolutely do it if you are willing and ready to get sober.
So yes, absolutely do it if you are willing and ready to get sober.
Member
Join Date: Jan 2017
Posts: 67
I would be weary of taking someones money with the hopes it makes you sober. You could leave there and go right back to drinking and still owe her the money not to mention hurt her as she sees you slip back into it.
I think you need to put the booze down and go take a long walk each day and avoid all drinking places and friends.
That's me personally. Like I say I am just worried if it fails then you are worse than you are now. But if you just stop drinking without the loan from her and without rehab then its a win for you personally and your sister not to mention financially.
I think you need to put the booze down and go take a long walk each day and avoid all drinking places and friends.
That's me personally. Like I say I am just worried if it fails then you are worse than you are now. But if you just stop drinking without the loan from her and without rehab then its a win for you personally and your sister not to mention financially.
Member
Join Date: Apr 2012
Location: northern michigan. not the U.P.
Posts: 15,281
Originally Posted by Poppy79 
A couple of posts here seem to imply rehab is not a great opportunity to assist in sobriety and that you should do it in your current environment if you want to succeed which I find outlandish!
Yes, you need to be willing to use the tools you will learn while there but my god, it is an absolutely awesome kick start to stop the vicious cycle of drinking.
Yes, you need to be willing to use the tools you will learn while there but my god, it is an absolutely awesome kick start to stop the vicious cycle of drinking.
Member
Join Date: Jun 2011
Posts: 50
I do have to sort of agree that Rehab sounds like a great opportunity for you, but borrowing your sisters money may hurt her in the end if you don't stick to it afterwards. Unless that would be more motivation not to take that first drink.
Member
Join Date: Apr 2012
Location: northern michigan. not the U.P.
Posts: 15,281
Originally Posted by Poppy79
Not sure how you read 'take a walk.... and do it on your own...' is encouraging rehab tomsteve but each to their own I suppose!
is in any of the replies in this thread. read em over a few times even to find it.
maybe im tired and missed it though.
Member
Join Date: Mar 2017
Posts: 72
Poppys comment ..."A couple of posts here seem to imply rehab is not a great opportunity to assist in sobriety and that you should do it in your current environment if you want to succeed which I find outlandish!"
Came BEFORE the "take a walk" post haha
Then she use the "take a walk" post to justify her comment above to tomsteve! When she made that comment above, the "take a walk post " hadn't even been written
Just an observation
Came BEFORE the "take a walk" post haha
Then she use the "take a walk" post to justify her comment above to tomsteve! When she made that comment above, the "take a walk post " hadn't even been written
Just an observation
Administrator
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,442
Hey guys- if you must make personal remarks about other posters or what they're posting, take them to PM please?
Rehabs been a great opportunity for many of my friends here and on that basis I encourage everyone to look into it if they can.
To say that rehab alone is often not enough to keep someone sober is not an outlandish statement to make though. I've seen that reflected here in my friend's stories here as well.
Let's all chill out - we're on the same team
D
Rehabs been a great opportunity for many of my friends here and on that basis I encourage everyone to look into it if they can.
To say that rehab alone is often not enough to keep someone sober is not an outlandish statement to make though. I've seen that reflected here in my friend's stories here as well.
Let's all chill out - we're on the same team
D
Last edited by Dee74; 03-24-2017 at 12:00 AM.
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