Day one without drink but hopefully not without partner
 

I've finally accepted that I can't moderate my drinking and it's been making my marriage unhappy for a few years now so I've decided I need to quit.

I thought I'd post my decision here as a kind of public declaration of my intent which hopefully will help me make the inner resolution that I need. Writing this has also helped my clarify and simplify my thoughts.

I hope my marriage will survive this because we have a divorce on hold and my drinking yesterday may have blown this, but I guess I have to do this for myself and look on my marriage as a nice consequence if it survives and something that I need to accept if it doesn't.

Thanks for reading guys!

Hi and welcoem back Aleric :)

I get you want to save your marriage - but you need to do this for *you*...no other motivation lasts the distance.

Have you thought about how you'll stay sober now?

D

Welcome Al- I agree with Dee- for you first.

Thanks Dee.

I've read many posts by you where you stress the importance of having a plans now that I've made the decision myself I really see the wisdom of this.

The plan I will try will be to practice mindfulness (often called urge-surfing in the context of addiction) and try to allow any cravings or obsessive thoughts about alcohol to just come and go without me trying to block them or get carried off by them. And also to regularly read this forum. I think this will work for me if I do it, but of course I will have to regard it as something I must absolutely do whatever else is happening in my life.

Thanks Phoenix. I do too.

Keep posting Al. Perhaps join the Class of March 2017 thread?

Good idea Phoenix. There doesn't seem to be a class one for March 2017 but I will join the next one that comes up.

Welcome and good luck AlericB. You can do this!!! get sober and stay sober the rest will workout the way it should. Write out some back up plans if you find yourself wanting booze. Good luck and many prayers.

I've been in that boat before.
There comes a time for us to grow up and stay sober.
M-Bob

Thanks Steve.

Good suggestion about having a back up plan. I am a Christian actually - I probably shouldn't but I always feel that I have to add that I respect other religions and philosophies too whenever I say that - so I think my back up plan would be to pray for help.

Thanks for all the feedback. It's a great help.

Indeed. I've left it as long as I can!