Repeat1234

I have a full time job, I work hard, I've been married almost 30 years and I have 2 diseases, autoimmune and apparently I'm an alcoholic. I didn't drink when I raised my 2 kids, never even thought about it. When they grew up and left the house I began drinking wine on the weekends, then at nights, every night. Then I started drinking and couldn't stop until I passed out. One episode led me to the hospital because I was choking on water and my husband took me to the emergency room. That was not my rock bottom. Just a few days ago I drank (with my husband) and then took sleeping pills and I got up in the middle of the night to use the restroom and I actually fell on the toilet and injured my back, where I have had a back fusion. I'm too embarrassed to tell anyone what happened and afraid I have ruined my back fusion because I'm in pain. Some of those nights I passed out I didn't want to wake up.

Repeat1234

I joined this forum in 2009 because I have a sibling who is an alcoholic.

Repeat1234

The only thing that is keeping me from drinking is my husband

Caramel

Lots of support here at SR for you Repeat1234.
Best wishes

PhoenixJ

Repeat - thanks for the brave share. I think you NEED to see a doctor about your back. Avoiding this will not do you any good. What can you do about the drinking/ A sobriety plan? Meetings? Journaling, therapy, counselling? Taking meds and drinking is unsafe. You have to stop drinking for you - not your hubby. There is lots of info in the stickies- here at SR on plans. Will power did not help me without support. Perhaps look at the other newcomer's threads- women's, 24, monthly - there are lots.
Keep posting and sharing. Support and empathy to you. PJ

Dee74

Hi repeat

Please do go and see your doctor to make sure things are ok. It's worth the embarrassment, surely?

I remember you had to go to the ER another time not too long ago.

Maybe it's time to get some outside help for your drinking?

D