JWS

The vast majority of people that enter the rooms of AA legitmately want to quit drinking. In fact, that's a REQUIREMENT of membership. Sadly, some have no desire whatsoever to do so. Rather, they are only there to avoid incarceration. Yes, I know the success stories of those who first entered on court slips. Still, I find with those not serious about our program. They simply do not respect the spirtitual foundation of our program: anonymity. Again, they don`t even want to be there. Why should they care about gossiping? (their thinking)

Because of my job, I have professional contact with those who break the law. Though I strategically attend meetings to vastly reduce the risk of recognition, it has not eliminated the encounters altogether. Long short, my anonymity has be broken several times. Though my sponsor, who works in the same field, says there was worse places to be seen, that is beside the point. I know for a fact there are true alcoholics who don't come in the rooms for the exact concern I described.

Closed meetings can be just as bad. These guys always have someone who will discreetly sign for them. They are all about attending meetings that minimize their inconvenience. The message is bey

Our 7th tradition says we are fully self-supporting, declining outside contributions. So is it about time agents of the government stop mandating people into the rooms? When they are ready on their own, the alcoholic is welcomed and encouraged to return.

tomsteve

theres a thread or 75 on this topic.
you might want to read the pamphlet
A.A. Guidelines on Cooperating with Court, D.W.I. and Similar Programs

and bring it up at a GC meeting.

7th tradition has nothing to do with court ordered attendance.

good on ya for 5 months!
how far along are ya with the steps?

did you value your anonymity of being a drunk when you were drinkin?

JWS

Yes. I rarely drank in public. I was a basement drinker.

paulokes

Personally I have no problem with anyone attending AA meetings. I don't feel threatened.

Personally I'm not convinced ordering someone to AA, who doesn't want to be there, works for them...but I know some folks here have a different view based on their own experience.

In short...it's none of my business

P

JWS

I don`t have a problem with anyone attending a meeting UNLESS they are indifferent or careless with another`s anonymity.

biminiblue

I don't see the problem?

You've quit drinking. No one is forcing you to go to meetings, are they?

I found that people in the world really don't care if I'm an ex-drinker. In my area the groups are huge, like 100 people in a meeting at the one down the street from me. It's likely on any given day I'll see someone I know from their jobs. I've seen a fireman with rank, a surgeon, a local prominent attorney, police officer, teacher, nurse, people from the "good" rich families - meh. I don't care - they're getting help and helping, right? It's actually comforting to me to see them out in the world.

That said, you could opt for a psychiatrist who is versed in addiction if you don't want to be seen. I mean, I'm just another person in recovery in the rooms, so maybe I don't understand what it's like to be so important as you.

tomsteve

p.s.
youre free to start a meeting and have it your way.

NYCDoglvr

I used to judge other folks at meetings but eventually learned to keep the focus on my own program. "The only requirement for membership is a desire to stop drinking......"

Forward12

Just my own opinion, but I don't see why you would be so paranoid about being seen at an AA meeting, people from all walks of life attend them.

tomsteve

one of the hardest things for me to accept is the world and its people weren't here to conform to what i thought they should do and when i had a problem with the world and its people, the problem was mine- the world wasn't going to conform to me.
i had to stop playing God.
good stuff about it in the big book, starting about here:
The first requirement is that we be convinced that any life run on self-will can hardly be a success. On that basis we are almost always in collision with something or somebody, even though our motives are good.

helped me tremendously to stop playing God then look at the causes and conditions for why i wanted the world to conform to me.

seems to be a lot more serene and peaceful life that way.

JeffreyAK

I know this topic used to come up a lot at Lifering meetings I attended, particularly online meetings. The reality is, mandated attendees by and large don't want to be there, and can cause problems for other folks who do want to be there. I've never seen anonymity be one of those problems, but subtle or not-so-subtle aggressiveness and rudeness can be. I suppose if you're still in denial and angry about getting caught and sentenced to attend meetings with a bunch of people who remind you of what you really are, it can turn you into an ass.

The only solution I saw in Lifering was, meetings where no attendance slips are signed. That's up to the group to decide, but there's no obligation for a meeting facilitator to sign attendance slips, and no signatures or stamps does drive out people who are required to attend (all of them, those who are causing problems and those who are not). In my opinion that's an extreme move, and mandated attendees would have to be causing major problems to justify that move. But in a couple online meetings, that was happening, and "no slips signed" solved the problems.

That was Lifering. AA is more evangelical, and "no slips signed" is probably less likely to be viewed favorably.

Doug39

Personally I don't care about remaining anonymous about going to AA.

What I don't like about the people that are court ordered to attend is that they do not participate and sometimes disrupt the meeting. Most of them just play on their phones the whole time.

Sure maybe one court ordered person out of a hundred might get something out of a meeting and change their ways - I guess that is the point of the court doing it.

I currently have the luxury to go to morning and/or lunchtime meetings and they seem to have mostly people that want to be at AA.

I went to a night meeting that was probably 80% court ordered in the group - they heckled the lead and were very rude - I never went back to that meeting.

ScottFromWI

Several posts and replies have been removed. Personal attacks against other members and personal feuding is prohibited in our public forums.

Steely

I wouldn't want to belong to a club where some people didn't want membership. I would defend their right to not attend.

2muchpain

Two quick things. First, I work with kids. Occasionally I'll see members bring their kids with them. I think it's great that they do this for several reasons, but I have to admit it always made me uncomfortable. Kids talk no matter what the parent says. I've seen people I work with at these meeting and I have no problem with that.
Second, I don't think it's any of my business why or how a person ended up at a meeting. I've seen people in treatment centers that were there to avoid jail time. Sometimes it worked, other times not, but the important thing is that the seed is planted. That's gotta be a good thing. John

BrendaChenowyth

Then you inform the person who takes an issue to your attending AA meetings that they need to learn a little more about them.

paulokes

It's a problem...but I think it's a PERSONAL problem. I work in Mental Health and do have to consider I may bump in to people at meetings that I have met at work, or people at work that I have met at meetings.

I have actually met someone in an inpatient psychiatric setting that I knew well from meetings. They were probably more concerned about me having a loose tongue than I was about them. But of course when it happened I panicked a little.

By the nature of their difficulties, this person was at the time a little delirious, not aware of their surroundings, not in complete control of their actions and potentially hostile. They definitely recognised me though and were aware of how we knew each other.

I've previously worked in other 'professional' jobs and again came across people at AA I knew professionally. Same thing.

It's all about how I decide to deal with those circumstances...and wether I choose to live in fear or trust that I can deal with any situation that comes up, if it comes up.

P

paulokes

Personally I would blame the court system and not the "club".

AA doesn't encourage court-mandated attendance but it doesn't turn people away either. Doesn't turn ANYONE away. Kind of a non-judgemental, last-chance-saloon kind of a deal. I personally would not want to deny anyone their last chance.

P

ljc267

Just curious.

Does AA receive state and/or federal funds? Just curious as to how the court is able to assign people to the program.

JeffreyAK

I don't know about funding, I doubt it, but in many places in the US, a DUI (and probably some other charges) will result in a judge telling you to attend alcoholism support group meetings. He can't legally tell you to go to AA, but in practice in many places, there are no options other than AA. That was the typical mandated route in meetings I used to attend. The rest were mandated by treatment programs that required them to attend a certain number of outside meetings, and in some cases those treatment programs were also mandated by a judge, but that seemed uncommon.