icefisher

Just curious, I'm at 8 months today. I have mostly avoided situations with friends who drink excessively. My partner does not drink at all so I'm lucky in that way. I have had lunch or dinner where people have a couple and didn't bother me a bit. I do feel like I'm sheltering myself a bit but I know it's for the best. I know I should try and make friends who don't drink but seems to be hard for me. I'm worried about being at the lake this summer where family will drink the entire weekend.

JeffreyAK

I still do avoid situations where people drink excessively at over 6 years, but not because I'm afraid I'll be tempted. It's because I really just don't want to be around drunks, they annoy me. You may find yourself feeling that way over time, too.

Dee74

I avoided them until I had no fear of relapse.

For me that was towards the end of my first year.

I knew I preferred being sober, I had no longing or regrets left regarding drinking.

Like JefferyAK tho I'm still not drawn to drinkfests - again, no fear/not tempted, I just find then boring - drinking to excess and drunk jerks test my patience.

D

Done4today

I too still avoid them at times. When I need to make an appearance I show up after the cocktail hour and seems to help avoid the "what are you drinking?" "what can I get you?" "why aren't you drinking?" questions. I have avoided gatherings that wasn't going to be a drunkfest but I wasn't feeling very spiritually fit. Rather apologize for missing an event than apologizing for relapsing and acting a fool.

MissPerfumado

Great question! Not counting work functions, I've only attended a few in 14 months of sobriety. A wedding, a couple of reunions with friends who visited from out of town, a couple of birthday functions, I can't really think of many more.

I also found, by the way, that my family now drink far less when we get together. Part of this is because I was the biggest drinker and worst influence ("Shall we have another bottle ...? Sure why not!") and part of this is because my family now seems to moderate when I'm around. Like I'm some sort of living reminder of the shadow of alcoholism in our family. You might find the same with your family ...?

Gottalife

For thirty seven years I have avoided functions where people drink excessively. It just so boring and I have better things to do. But as far as social events where alcohol is consumed, I probably stayed clear for a year or so. It wasn't so much the drinking I was concerned about as my lack of social skills.

AAPJ

For me it was a pretty short time - maybe one month of sobriety. It was a fundraising event at our church and the evening ticket included dinner and an open bar. We are Catholic so unlike some of the fire and brimstone protestants we serve alcohol. I was with my wife so that was helpful.

Anyway the evening went fine. What I discovered was that to everyone else I'm not the center of the universe and my not drinking was not noticed.

FBL

I "tested" myself about a week in by spending a few hours at my favorite bar. I drank soda and watched everybody else get drunk. I quickly realized that I needed to find something better to do, so I did.

BrendaChenowyth

There hasn't been a time I haven't had alcohol within reach, so I don't really know what it's like to be in alcohol-free environments. I have six months.

Doug39

I am 4 months sober and during these 4 months I never avoided places that involved liquor. My wife still drinks everyday so alcohol is always in the house. We still go to bars at least once a week.

I do not want to drink. 27 years of daily drinking took a toll on my mind, body and spirit.

Avoiding places and people that are involved with alcohol will not keep you sober. If you really don't want sobriety you will drink. I want sobriety and sanity - I will stay sober no matter how much alcohol is in front of me.

Tonight I am going to a reverse raffle at my church. I have been going to this event every year for many years. In the past I would make sure I got there as soon as the bar opened so I could suck down as much free booze as possible.

Tonight I look forward to the nice dinner, the conversations with family and friends, and everything else. My focus will not be on the booze - like in the past.

icefisher

Thanks for the feedback! I know I cannot avoid it forever, I just wanted to get some time sober before exposing myself to many temptations. I have avoided some ice fishing trips and a annual poker game. I miss hanging out with my friends but I could not envision watching 3 guys drink in a fish house for 3 days. I like the idea of showing up after happy hour. I have been working on my social anxiety issues so I'm hoping i have an easier time making some new friends who don't drink.

Have a great weekend!

thomas11

I avoid functions or places that are happening exclusively to drink. No point in being there. I think I felt comfortable around people drinking after a few months.

ScottFromWI

My thoughts on this are similar to Thomas. I still avoid events or places that are exclusively about drinking. Bars, bachelor parties, guys drinking weekends, etc. I will most likely avoid these forever as there is nothing for me there. I do attend weddings, anniversaries, family event, etc where alcohol is present, but not the main reason to be there. At these events you will notice that most people aren't there to get drunk, a pleasant surprise indeed!

NYCDoglvr

I'm sober 25 years and will NEVER go anywhere someone is drunk. If it happens when I'm out I leave immediately.

Sudz No More

I'm not afraid to be around it but I try to avoid it. I have no desire to go to functions that have alcohol but I would go to a friend's party and just not drink. I'm certainly not about to hang out at the bar, that's something I may never do again.

waynetheking

I go anywhere I want to. Alcohol will never determine what I do in life again. Period.

Aquafina

I had almost 3 years once. Played pool in bars 5 days a week. Drank sprite. It wasn't always easy... but I could play pool for 4-5 hours and I loved practicing and playing the best I could. I'd occasionally go to drinking buddies houses as well.

I don't advise doing what I did.
Avoid dating active alcoholics. I can't believe started again.

least

Altho I was a home alone drinker, I didn't go to any events that featured drinking for the first few months. I now trust myself to not drink, but as was said, drunkfests are boring. I'd rather be home with the company of my dogs and cats.

degadar

Well done on the 8 months.
I avoided functions and drinkers for the best part of 2 years I think. Work christmas parties were pretty much unavoidable and I left early as soon as everyone was getting drunk.
Don't worry about appearing antisocial. They'll be so drunk they won't even notice you're not there. That's how social drinking is.