Caring too much what others think & anxiety
Member
Join Date: Aug 2015
Location: US
Posts: 5,095
Hey Centered
I'm sure I have nothing new to say, but I think you handled the situation just fine.
Wine helping Alzheimers....PAH-lease! Alcohol is a neuro-toxin. Nuff said. Your friend owns a wine business....she may not want to false advertise
I think that's the kind of stuff snake oil salesmen used to say. The alcohol industry will have us believing all kinds of stuff that simply isn't true.
But obviously the point of this is caring about what others think. Oh man, I relate. I used to think it was my responsibility to make everyone feel good. And if someone didn't, or something seemed off, clearly it was my fault. I felt I had to be all kinds of things that I'm simply not. Hence the reason I loved alcohol so much. It made me into what I thought I should be...or so I thought Its been a real challenge for me to learn that I'm ok, just as I am. If someone has an issue, its not mine to own, or change (btw, your thread has helped me because its reminded me of this....and I need to always be reminded). If there's an awkward silence, or something is hanging in the the air, its not my job to change that. I don't have to do anything, really. Some other people pleaser will jump in soon enough
Anyway, I get it. You are wonderful just as you are. If someone has an issue, its there not yours. You'll know when your aim isn't true....and you'll make an amends when that happens. You just keep being you.
I'm sure I have nothing new to say, but I think you handled the situation just fine.
Wine helping Alzheimers....PAH-lease! Alcohol is a neuro-toxin. Nuff said. Your friend owns a wine business....she may not want to false advertise
I think that's the kind of stuff snake oil salesmen used to say. The alcohol industry will have us believing all kinds of stuff that simply isn't true.But obviously the point of this is caring about what others think. Oh man, I relate. I used to think it was my responsibility to make everyone feel good. And if someone didn't, or something seemed off, clearly it was my fault. I felt I had to be all kinds of things that I'm simply not. Hence the reason I loved alcohol so much. It made me into what I thought I should be...or so I thought
Its been a real challenge for me to learn that I'm ok, just as I am. If someone has an issue, its not mine to own, or change (btw, your thread has helped me because its reminded me of this....and I need to always be reminded). If there's an awkward silence, or something is hanging in the the air, its not my job to change that. I don't have to do anything, really. Some other people pleaser will jump in soon enough Anyway, I get it. You are wonderful just as you are. If someone has an issue, its there not yours. You'll know when your aim isn't true....and you'll make an amends when that happens. You just keep being you.
Member
Join Date: May 2014
Posts: 2,950
Alcoholism is a risk factor for neurodegenerative diseases, I understand.
I believe that one 4 oz glass of wine a day might make me healthier. Our liver is cool with that.
But how many people are having just 4 ounces a day?
I believe that one 4 oz glass of wine a day might make me healthier. Our liver is cool with that.
But how many people are having just 4 ounces a day?
Member
Join Date: Jun 2010
Location: UK
Posts: 2,931
Hey!!!!
You never feel bad for being the person you are.
You know what there are some of us who actually do care about what other people think of us.
I am one of them.
I do not believe anyone who says they 100% do not care.
Some people we meet in life should start to wonder what people think of them, like this 'lady' you encountered.
It drives me up the wall the crap we take for not drinking.
You do not need to have a reason why you are not drinking.
This is your battle, and like my battle, fight it as you see fit.
You are not smuggling rare animals, committing serious crime, planning a dangerous robbery, smuggling ivory, hurting the elderly for goodness sake - you are just having a soft drink.
I often find 'I said no' works.
Do not let anyone make you feel inferior EVER yep?
You never feel bad for being the person you are.
You know what there are some of us who actually do care about what other people think of us.
I am one of them.
I do not believe anyone who says they 100% do not care.
Some people we meet in life should start to wonder what people think of them, like this 'lady' you encountered.
It drives me up the wall the crap we take for not drinking.
You do not need to have a reason why you are not drinking.
This is your battle, and like my battle, fight it as you see fit.
You are not smuggling rare animals, committing serious crime, planning a dangerous robbery, smuggling ivory, hurting the elderly for goodness sake - you are just having a soft drink.
I often find 'I said no' works.
Do not let anyone make you feel inferior EVER yep?
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